Demon Village
by firebirds416
Summary: Are legends true? Of course not, right? Right? But what if one was...Srry, currently on hiatus, no time due to schoolwork, i'll try to work on it some more. Definitly will update by summer vacation.
1. Shinobi legend

Disclaimer: Ya'll know I don't own Naruto right? Good. Oh, and this applies for the rest of the story, what can I say, I'm lazy.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"This is an old legend. About the First of the firsts, about times of war, and times of peace, but most important of all, its about friendship and loyalty.

There exists, neither here nor there, between the nonexistent and the infinite, and forever held in the midst of time, a hidden village. It was once a wondrous place, full of marvels and strength, for within its walls lay the tombs of the first shinobis. They were the finest warriors ever, even though they were but four. There was the master of taijutsu, of genjutsu, and of ninjutsu, and then there was the master of the light and the dark, the first shinobi ever. It was said that this man had been trained by demons, and grew up around them, had befriended them even! And that a prophet had told him to go and seek a master of each of the three bodily traits: of the physical movements, of the mental and the spiritual, and-a mix of the three-of the elemental energies. These four all became fast friends, and eventually taught each other all they knew, though they each stayed the master of their respective categories. These four friends eventually founded the first ninja city, the Hidden Village of Miracles.

Their village prospered and grew, and some kids were chosen for shinobi duties. They were taught under the four friends, each in each of their respective categories. Eventually the ranks grew until there were a respective amount of Nins, with more training in the wings. The village grew until it seemed a city in size, if not in name. It was no longer small enough to walk from one end to the other on a whim, people kept to their communities, and clans came to be. This was a time of peace and prosperity, serenity and growth, and for a few years, the village was unknown to other countries, and was blissfully ignored until it was too late, as it had then become a strong power.

Of course, as with all great beings, others seek to rob them of that power, or at least bring them under their control. Others, not-so-graced in their strength, those whom were too lazy to improve themselves, greedy warlords of great armies and magnificent nations, these and many more, all tried to breach the city's wall. And yet, every time they tried to siege the village, they were deterred at every angle. The walls grew spikes when they tried to break it; the ground grew arms and dragonheads and attacked the enemy. Fire, water, even the very wind itself, all seemed to come to life around the village and ally themselves with the evil ones. Indeed, to them, the village was all the things that they hated and despised, which was part of the reason they called it Demon Village. They used black magic, they did not fight fairly, they even allowed women into combat! And despite all that, they were winning. None had yet to break through the wall, none had yet to scale its heights, though one daring and memorable, though foolish, commander took it upon himself to try and climb with half his army. The poor fools never got more than halfway before the wall suddenly sprouted people all clothed in black, all standing as if the wall was the ground, and a giant massacre ensued, and wall was as blood red as the moon that night. It was that night that history was made, the shinobis inside were tired of war, they wanted peace, they wanted to go outside and run in real grass, they wanted run up and jump in real trees, they wanted to walk on running rivers rather then just stand in bowls of water.

They sent a messenger to the warlords, the shinobis wanted peace, the warlords wanted peace, each also wanted the others to just disappear off the earth as well, but as that wasn't going to happen, they settled on an amnesty. "Demon Village" opened its gates to the citizens once more, and a peace was once again spreading its wings throughout the land. The Hidden Miracle started to become too small for some of the younger Nins. They were ambitious and strong, and they knew they had no place in a community where all the places were taken, so they did the one thing they could, they moved out, and started their own villages. They left with the Firsts' blessings, as they wanted to extend their hand farther out to others. They took jobs and commissions to survive, they were oppressed by others, some went back, thoroughly humbled, some survived, and took government positions and assignments. The strongest though, started their own villages, not all succeeded, some failed due to a number of reasons, mismanagement, overly ambitious, or they could have just angered a neighboring community that drove them out. Out of those that made it though, the only ones that really prospered, were the best of them all. They grew fast, and quickly progressed, some started to create new styles of fighting, new types of ninjutsu, and eventually, they were separate entities, self supporting and prospering, they owed debts to no one, and yet, they never forgot their Village of origin, and set their allegiances with the Hidden Miracle.

The warlords never forgot though, and had laid in waiting for many years, advancing, gaining allies, buying up weaponry with which to supply their new ranks of troops. They then reached a point in which all the warlords all owed-one way or another-one warlord their loyalty and help. Now history may have left us with many bits of information, but unfortunately, the name of this influential man is not one of them, all that is known is that he was brave in battle, had a slight tendency to dress flashy, and was respected, and loved by his men. Either way though, he gathered the largest army every known to this earth, and marched towards the Hidden Village of Miracles.

The Hidden Miracle wasn't wasting time though, the four Firsts, once the most respected ninjas throughout the land, were now gone and dead. All great men have to fall eventually, for them; their time had come a while ago. The Village was not defenseless though; a large jutsu was created in order to remove all of the shinobis to another land, one devoid of their hated enemy. The council called in all the defenseless, the elder and crippled, the women and young, they were all were called to Hidden Miracle before the great army could reach them. This was a never-before-done jutsu, was originally left unfinished since the time of the Firsts and hurriedly completed before the army could arrive. It was like a summoning jutsu, except in reverse, so everything was complicated to the extreme in order to make sure everything and everybody whom the jutsu was supposed to transport would arrive safely, and in one piece, instead of blown across half the landscape in a mist of blood. All the research was done, the jutsu, in theory, would work, but it would take time to complete the chakra charging and the multitude of katas, a full week to be exact, and the Warlord's army was upon their doorstep. All was thought lost, until a ninja army arrived. It was composed of the many, younger Hidden Villages, they had banded together and to try and buy time for the Hidden village. They numbered over ten thousand, but compared to immensity of the Warlord's army, they were greatly outnumbered. They were each as strong as many men, they could all fight continuously for a long amount of time, but an entire week was near impossibility. It was a futile effort, and they knew it, but still they fought.

They took down many of the enemy in the first few days, and few, if any shinobis died those days. Carcasses of fallen samurai and warriors littered the ground until the ground was covered in dead men three deep. Each new attack eventually started with soldiers charging over the dead bodies of their comrades, until they joined them. Even the lowest ranking shinobi killed over fifty soldiers, one man had claimed to have taken out half of a company with one soldier, and still another had claimed to have killed over a thousand. Those few days were ones of battle frenzy and victories; those were the Days of Glory. After the third day though, battle fatigue started to show. The enemy had more soldiers then positions with which they could attack them from, so the Warlord's army began each new attack with fresh, rested and well-fed soldiers. The Shinobi army however, was under supplied, as all available men were fighting, and tired, as they did not have enough men to take shifts fighting. The Shinobi army suddenly started dropping like flies under each new assault. Now, both sides had to fight standing on the bodies of dead men, once their friends and comrades, now a new/old battleground. Men were littered everywhere, no place had less then a pile of men five deep, in some it was more than twenty. The places where the largest battles had taken place started to become hills. Both sides fought for possession of the pile of bodies, each attempt adding to its size and desirability. Some shinobis started to live by the hour, taking soldier pills with frightening regularity. Others, started to lose their minds, and had to be under the effects of genjutsu to continue fighting, as that was their wish. The Shinobi's army started to lose its advantage of ninjutsu and devastating long-range attacks. More and more started to switch to conserving their chakra for an added advantage in melee fights. They started to lose land, little by little, the Warlord's army advanced towards the Hidden village, and it was only the fifth day.

On the morning of the sixth, barely any of the ninjas had any chakra left for anything but the most basic of jutsus, they were almost out of soldier pills, with enough for only one or two boosts more. All was lost, and both sides knew it. The Warlords dressed in fancier armor then the battle-ruined armor they had wore the past few days. The Shinobis just wearily pulled their tired bodies up and readied themselves for another long day; for some, shorter than others. They knew it was pointless, but still they fought, not only to rid themselves of a long-time debt the owned to the Village in helping them in times of need, but also for their pride. They had all depleted a great many enemy warriors; what was once lush and arable farmland and grassland was now a bloodstained battlefield. Men were littered everywhere, as everybody seemed to be fighting on a raised platform of dead friends. Their army was failing though, what was once a large army of over ten thousand now numbered only a fraction of that. The jutsu was almost finished though, they just had to hold them off for another day, and then they could all rest.

They all tried, they really did, with all their might they resisted, however, the Warlord's army, sensing victory, suddenly surged forward in a massive charge. Caught weakened and aged considerably with a week of relentless battling, they only managed a brief halt in the charge before they swept past them in a wave of blood as they the remaining shinobis performed all types of forbidden kinjutsus in a last-ditch effort to bring as many of enemy as they could to the afterlife. Explosions of chakra created vast holes in formations, silent one-on-one kills blew up commanders in gouts of blood, various types of elements were summoned from life offerings and wiped out vast amounts of troops. Even the ones who couldn't do or didn't know kinjutsus made their lives expensive. Wielding their kunais like daggers and using up the last of their shruiken, they fought in the enclosed space the doorway provided, while one of them ran to the main chamber as the harbinger of impending doom. The giant gates blew open as the pressing of bodies broke the lock-bar, for once, the wall wasn't attacking since they, and all other independent defensive jutsus had been drained of chakra for the jutsu. Gaining land step by step, the Warlord' army forced the remaining tiny group of Shinobis to the door of the main chamber. As they approached, the door swung open, and inside could be seen several Nins frantically trying to speed up their seal making without making any mistakes. Nothing could disturb their circle, so everybody not busy with the jutsu went outside to fight, somewhat rested if drained of chakra. Their slight reinforcements were a much-needed respite for the tired fighters. Accurately thrown shruiken and kunai forced the ranks back a bit, a second wave of various jutsus forced them back even more and fresh soldier pills helped to even up the score a bit. The enemy still had a large army, but barely a quarter to what they had before. However, with the majority of the thirty Nins tired from a weeklong war, and the others elderly and drained of chakra and energy, such a respite could not hold for long. They were overwhelmed and the Warlord's armies surged forward. He ordered his entire army through the gates, and before closing them himself he was heard by a few barely surviving nins say, 'to prevent the enemy from escaping, I have trapped them in here with us' As they burst through the doors, the few remaining nins were severely distracted for the first time since the beginning of the jutsu a week ago. One of them panicked and quickly did a series of ten seals, activating the unfinished jutsu, by the time the others noticed what was happening, it was too late. The entire city, the few remaining Nins, the entirety of the Warlord's army and the citizens of the village in the basement rooms…all were gone, as if a giant hand had scooped out the entire city, down to its very foundations.

The few surviving Nins regrouped, and started another Hidden Village. As all of the Warlords and their armies had disappeared along with the city, they were safe. By the time any of the communities had regrouped enough to pose a threat, the shinobis had prospered and grew. They now a full village, not just a bunch of houses whose residents knew each other. Their ranks had swelled so that instead of either crippled elderly Shinobi, and young wet-behind-the-ears rookies, there were full-time soldiers with various battles under their belt. Eventually, they grew and expanded, groups leaving and founding new Hidden Villages, some died, others grew, and then split up. In time, they grew into the Hidden Villages that we have today."

When the Third finished, he smiled as he saw his entire audience in rapture of what he said. The twenty something kids in front of him had sat with their complete attention towards him, not even noticing when their marshmallows had been burnt to a crisp. Every time he told this ancient legend to a new group of first year academy students, the reactions had been the same year after year. Disbelief. Amusement. Interest. This year though…

"YEAH! THAT WAS A GREAT STORY GRANDPA, DO YOU HAVE ANYMORE LIKE IT!"

Ah yes, Uzumaki Naruto, known by general consensus as the loudest student in the Academy, and as usual, slightly insulting without actually making anybody feel insulted. Sarutobi himself didn't mind the "Grandpa" crack, well, not too much anyway. Naruto's teacher though, was another story.

After hitting him on the head, he yelled, "SHUT UP! How dare you call the Hokage by such an insulting name! Now leave and go home!"

"What! But we're twenty miles from Konoha! And it's already night!"

Smirking until it looked just under cruelty, "So, you want to be Hokage right? Think of this as advanced endurance-survival training!"

Frowning slightly at the instructor's degenerative tone, Sarutobi said, "No, No, its alright. I don't mind, really, let him stay with the others."

"But Hokage-sama…"

"I said it's **alright!**" said the Third firmly, with just a _slight _emphasis on the last word.

Grumbling as he was walking off, the instructor mumbled, "…alright is it? No it's not…not as long as that _demon _is still around Konoha…"

Expressing some displeasure at the instructor's words, and hoping that the kids wouldn't hear and ask what they meant, the Third turned back to the group, "Now, where were we… Ah, yes. To answer your question Naruto, yes, there are two more legends affiliated with that particular one, want to hear them?"

"HELL YEAH!"

Smiling slightly at the boy's enthusiasm, "There were two more legends that they left behind though, in the form of scrolls. It is commonly believed that the Hidden Miracle contained four scrolls of great value, written by the Firsts themselves, containing the techniques they knew and how to perform them. Many believe that great, powerful jutsus are contained in these four scrolls. However, soon after they died, the council believed that the techniques contained in these scrolls were too strong, so they buried each of them with their respective writer, and hid each tomb in a large labyrinth below the Village. This labyrinth was said to be the ultimate test for any whom would seek the scrolls. It is filled with countless traps and summoned demons that live off of the corpses and each other. This is almost common knowledge as it is very likely, but almost impossible to confirm as the entire labyrinth is gone with the Village. The second legend though, says that the person whom finished the jutsu believed almost religiously in backups, and copied it down on another scroll, then hid it somewhere outside the village. This scroll is said to help the user find the Hidden Miracle, and everything affiliated with it that left when they did. Most regard this as pure myth though, as they believe it is highly unlikely the person had any time to copy such a lengthy jutsu down twice and hide the second outside the walls in the small amount of time he had."

"Hokage-sama?"

"Yes?"

"Did anybody even try to search for the scrolls?"

"Of course, mostly treasure hunters though, and none of them found anything, even though they must have followed up on every rumor and crater in the elemental countries. Oh yes! I forgot to tell you, there was also a poem that was passed down with the legend:

_Hidden 'tween, Tygers' blue road_

_Inside of the training tree_

_Defended by the home of gold_

_Defend yourself, pay the fees_

_Enclosed is the key, 'neath the seam_

_Need help? Bring a fox_

_Include a friend, take a team,_

_Slog through the maze of rock_

That's it, good night everybody!"

"(Chorused) Good night Hokage-sama!"


	2. God Save the Queen

A/N: I'm assuming that in the last chapter Naruto is around ten years old. Oh, and there might one major time jump later, or a few smaller ones, depends on my mood.  And I may digress a bit off the plot, don't worry about it; I'll come back to it eventually.

Human speech_Human thoughts_

Kyubbi speech_Kyubbi thoughts_

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

The bell rang…

For most kids, the end bell of the first day after summer break would be a time of relief and delight, as their parents came to pick them up form school. Uzumaki Naruto, however, was not 'most kids'. People hated him. Students hated him. Even his past three teachers hated him. This year, however, was different. This year, he had Iruka-sensei. Iruka-sensei was a kind person to him, he had actually taught him instead of ignoring him, or worse, throwing him out of the classroom like previous teachers did, and he didn't always leave through the door.

Now though, now, Naruto was learning, or trying to learn, bushins and kamiwari no jutsus, he was getting better at throwing his kunai and shruiken, he was learning how to be a shinobi! Such was Naruto's happy thoughts that he didn't notice the half-drunken crowd coming towards him.

For Naruto, it was a painful surprise as he was hoisted up by his shirt and thrown into the nearest alleyway. Crying as he hit the ground, Naruto turned around and saw the angry mob. It was always like this, people got drunk, they would see him, and they would beat him. It wasn't fair, you didn't see other kids get attacked like him, and he didn't even know why they were angry with him.

It was always worth a shot though, "Why are you doing this to me?"

"Because you're a demon!"

Figures, the usual answer, and the answer to almost every question he asked them. Knowing what was going to happen, and to weak to stop it, Naruto prepared himself for pain and curled into a fetal position. Then the pain came…

Those who lived next to the alley poked their heads out to complain about all the noise, once they saw that it was the demon getting his due, most nodded in a satisfied way, and drew their heads back in, some called out comments and advice on where or how to hit him, others just cut out the middle man and joining the mob. When they were done, they picked him up, waltzed right out of Konoha's walls, the gate guards mostly just looked the other way when they saw an unconscious Naruto, and pitched him into the forest.

Naruto landed with a loud crash as he landed in a small clearing. Most of the animals nearby ran away, some of the more adventurous started to examine him; some would have eaten him if it weren't for his protective red aura. One animal in particular felt himself drawn towards it…

When Naruto woke up, he was sitting against a tree. He felt better, there wasn't as much pain, and his wounds felt cool and comfortable. Looking at them, he saw herbs and medicinal plants on his wounds, some tied with fibers to keep them against his skin. Looking up, he saw that the clearing was full of foxes, all staring at him. That got him up faster than anything else, but corner against a tree, breathing hard, and having multiple wounds meant he wasn't going to be going anytime soon, so he stared back at the mob of foxes, trying to discern an answer for his fate. When they saw he was staring back, they all lowered their heads in what was unmistakably a bow.

"Huh? Owww" Naruto pressed his hand against his side, where it started to bleed again. Sitting down, he felt a furry head press against his hand, looking up, some of the foxes had left, and carried back leaves or herbs, most of which Naruto didn't recognize. The fox at his side was pulling the fiber rope off and gently lifting the huge leaf off his side, exposing a very bloody wound. Kindly, almost motherly, she chewed some of the new herbs up then spat it on his wound to make a paste that she spread around with her paws before covering it again with a fresh leaf and retying the fibers.

Throughout the entire operation, Naruto had been looking at the motherly fox with wondrous eyes and thinking in the back of his head, _How is this happening?_ He certainty didn't expect an answer of, **What; you think foxes, master tricksters and pranksters, don't know how to tie a simple knot?**

Looking around frantically he yelled, "Who said that?"

**I did**

"Where are you?"

Sounding amused, **Inside of you kit, where else would I be?**

Quieting down a bit, "What the hell do you mean in me, and who the hell are you?"

Still sounding amused,** First off, the Yondaime, for which I am forever grateful, sealed me in you, and second, I'm the Kyubbi.**

Hearing this, Naruto exploded, "WHAT THE HELL! THE KYUBBI WAS KILLED BEFORE I WAS BORN!"

**Actually, the Kyubbi was mistakenly thought to be killed on the exact day you were born, and I wasn't killed, I was sealed into a newborn babe, you.**

"Why would the Yondaime do that? I remember that the Kyubbi tried to destroy Konoha," starting to cry as he realized something, "So that's why I was called a demon, but why me? Did the Yondaime hate me or something?"

In about as soothing a tone as a demon could, the Kyubbi answered, **No, the Yondaime loved you, loved you and your mother, hell, he should have anyway, he was your father! And he sealed me into you because I was under the control of a jutsu; I was actually the Yondaime's best friend, well, best non-human friend. He didn't want to destroy me, so I was left to live, inside the body of his child. **

"Well," Naruto challenged the Kyubbi, "How do I know you're not lying? You could just be trying to trick me into letting you out."

**First off kit, this seal the Yondaime put on you is unbreakable, it is designed to let a body house two souls without destroying the body by forcing the souls to mix. In other words, your soul and mine are now pretty much one and the same, so when you die, I will be carried off to the next world with you, so I believe I have a pretty good reason in wanting to have you live as long as you can. On the plus side however, as you are the original owner and thus, controller of this body, you get to use, not only your chakra, but mine as well, and let me tell you a secret, my demonic chakra is _way _more potent than your human chakra, which means that where you might need, say, a hand full of your chakra, you only need a about a finger full of mine. **

**"**What the hell does that mean?"

Sounding exasperated, **It means that if our chakra capacity are the same-which they aren't-and we both do the same jutsu over and over again until we run out of chakra, I can do the jutsu three times as many times as you can. More on that later, I think you should let my people leave, extended bowing is not good for a fox's head you know.**

**"**How do I do that?"

**Just tell the queen here that they can leave; she's the one that patched you up.**

**"**Er, excuse me, um, madam fox?" The Queen of Foxes look up at him, "Um, You can go now, I'll be fine. Thank you for your attention." She bowed one more time, then turned towards her subjects, yelped a few times, and then bounded off into the forest with the rest of them.

Trying to get up, Naruto found that the wounds on his legs, which had started to heal, started to bleed again from the last time he got up. "Owww…"

**Here's a gift from me to you, you'll be ok now kit…**

With those words, Naruto found that his wounds hurt even less now, then they stopped hurting at all, peeling off his make-shift bandages, Naruto stared, his skin was unbroken, like he had never been hurt at all, not even a scar to show where there had been and injury. He had always healed rather fast compared to other kids, but he had always thought that that was a result of having all those rocks thrown at him in the past. Now, an open wound that was bleeding to the point that he fainted from blood loss was closed in a matter of seconds. Getting up and walking back to Konoha's gates, he started to smile, and then grin, the prospect of having a demon inside of you was starting to look better and better.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"What do you mean, you won't let me in?"

"Exactly that demon brat," answered a gate guard nastily, "you can go anywhere you like, just not back to Konoha."

"What! But I need to get home," when pleading didn't work, Naruto switched to whining, "I'm hungry, I'm tired, it's dark, and I want to go home and sleep."

"SHUT UP!" The gate guard had had about enough of this Kyubbi brat _Damn Kyubbi, why didn't you get eaten like a good little demon, eh? Huh, even the animals are afraid of that one, hate to be the one to let a demon back inside of Konoha for another massacre, even if it _is _just a twelve year old kid. _Backhanding him, the guard knocked him down a few feet. Walking over, he pulled out a kunai and said, "Well, if the animals of the forest won't eat you alive, you demon, how…about…dead."

At those last three words, the guard turned Naruto over, with every intention of slitting the boy's throat, until he saw the eyes. Those eyes were those of a demon, red, with slits instead of pupils. Dropping the kunai from shock, the demon's hand snaked out and grabbed it before it hit the ground, then released a large amount of killing intent. At that, the guard gave a cry of terror, and tried to scramble away before getting frozen from sheer terror.

"**Demon am I? Maybe you should see just how _demonic _I can be!" **With those words, Naruto/Kyubbi released a controlled burst of demonic chakra, engulfing the poor guard but keeping it shielded from Konoha and any annoying shinobis that might investigate. Creating a small dome shield of demonic chakra, Naruto/Kyubbi looked at the unfortunate guard inside with him, gave a very sinister grin, and said, "**Well now, this is an interesting predicament, you, and me, both in a sound-proofed barrier, where no one can hear your screams for help." **

_Hey, don't hurt him. _Yelled Naruto's consciousness from deep within his mind.

**_Don't worry, I won't touch neither hide nor hair of him, just scare him a little._**

Forcing the guard to look at him, Naruto/Kyubbi forced him into a terrifying genjutsu, and the guard started a soundless scream in terror, his eyes rolled up into his head, he turned pale as a ghost, then he fell down and curled up into a fetal position and started to mumble gibberish. Withdrawing his chakra Naruto/Kyubbi started to walk farther down the wall, while the other guard, now free from the killing intent, rushed to his friend's side.

Yelling after the boy demon, he said, "Hey, you demon! What did you do to him?"

Turning around, the other guard froze slightly as he looked into Naruto/Kyubbi's eyes as he radiated a slight killing intent, "**Don't worry, he'll be fine in a few days, he just needs to recover a bit from the genjutsu I put on him, though he might be frightened of small noises for a few months."** Pasting Naruto's traditional fox grin with an additional demonic twist to it, Naruto/Kyubbi turned back and walked farther, always next to the wall, until he turned a corner and was out of sight of the frozen guard.

Relaxing again after the kid turned the corner, the guard picked up his radio and spoke into it, " I have a guard down with me at the North gate, requesting Medic-nins."

"_crackle _Request received, two medic-nins coming your way."

The medic-nins came several minutes later, as they turned him over, they saw his face and blanched. The guard's face was pale as a ghost, and his eyes unnaturally looked like those of a Hyuuga's, to top it off, his lips were mumbling incoherently, and he refused to lie down, always curled up into a fetal position. One of them breathed, "Kami-sama, who or what under the stars did this to him?"

Smiling grimly, the guard answered, "The Kyubbi brat."


	3. Of Luck And Fear

A/N: Please report any and all possible grammar mistakes, misspellings, and missing words. I don't care how minor it is; I'm a perfectionist. I do try to pick them up myself through proofreading, but you know, there's only so much I can do on a limited time schedule and I want to get these chapters uploaded as soon as possible. Thanks!

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto somehow managed to stumble his way around the corner, and then his legs gave out as he fell against the wall.

_What did you do?_

**Just like I told you kit, I just scared him a little. It was all just a genjutsu, one that showed his deepest fears, although I must admit, I never expected such a strong reaction. Hmm, you think maybe my coming had something to do with it? **At these words, Naruto suddenly had a vision of a manically grinning fox. Finding the energy to get up and walk again, Naruto got up and started to walk along the wall again, then something the fox had said earlier started to pick at him.

_Yo, furball!_

**WHAT DID YOU CALL ME!**

Completely ignoring the possible implications of insulting one of the nine greater demons, not to mention a permanent resident of his body, Naruto continued his question, _How did The Fourth know you anyway? I mean, from what they say, you were two hundred foot high fox! It seems kind of hard to keep up a steady relationship when you could be easily found just by looking up!_

Starting to speak in a pleasant tone, just like someone does just before they lose it completely, the Kyubbi said, **Kit, first of all, it wasn't two hundred, think more like three to four, second, I was the lord summons of foxes, so the Yondaime used to just walk out to some secluded training area and summon me. And third, NEVER, CALL ME FURBALL AGAIN! **

_Well, what can you do about it? Seeing as you're locked up inside of me right now._

Grinning madly, **Kit, I'm the lord of _foxes, _how hard it would be to convince the local Queen to harass you for the next ten years I wonder?**

_Ok, ok, I get your point, no more calling you furball._

**Better. And kit, where do you think you're going?**

_I think there's another gate farther down the wall. Yeah, there it is, see?_

**Kit, imagine you have a brain for a moment.**

_Hey!_

Kit, I'm serious, you saw what happened with this gate, what makes you think the others will be any different? In the entire _damn _village, I'll wager _anything, _that there are ten, fifteen _tops, _that don't either actively hate you, or totally loathe you, and what are the chances of them getting guard duty this particular night, eh? 

_Well, I can at least try. I'll never give up, that's my ninja way._

The Kyubbi persisted,** Kit, you're not thinking straight, if you're even thinking at all. What are the _damn _odds! **At this moment, one of the guards was looking around, whatever he was expecting, it defiantly wasn't a beaten up kid looking to be around ten. Then Iruka did a double take once he got past the rips and dirt, "Naruto? Is that you?"

**Well I'll be damned…**

Smiling smugly at having beaten the fox at the odds, Naruto replied, "Yeah Iruka'-sensei, its me!"

Running towards the scruffy child, "Naruto, what happened to you? You're all dirty and your clothes are beaten up."

Quickly making up an excuse, "Uh, I was training in the forest and I kind of lost track of time," acting sheepish, Naruto asked, "Um, could you let me in Iruka-sensei."

"Sure, you're just lucky I have the night watch for this week."

"Thanks Iruka-sensei!"

Once Naruto got inside the walls again, he wasted no time in running home, all the while talking to the fox. _Kyubbi, could you teach me some cool jutsu?_

**Hm, I guess I could do that, but you have to promise to do everything I say. And I'll know if you're slacking off. **

_Alright! What kind of jutsu are you gonna teach me, huh? Huh?_

**All the ones I can teach you that don't require any demonic parts. Some of the demon jutsus require part-tail seals and flexible claws, as you don't have either, I can't teach them to you without risk of either permanently burning off your chakra pathways, or blowing up half of Konoha.**

While he was talking to the Kyubbi, he wasn't too aware of what was happening in the physical world, and had bumped into some of the mob that had thrown him out earlier.

"What the…Hey how did you get back in here?"

"He's a demon"

"Yeah, we should kill him this time. Make sure he never comes back."

**Kit, now would be a good time to let me take over real quick…**

_Just don't hurt them._

**You know, this no blood thing is _really _starting to tick me off. I mean, they're trying to kill you! **

_I don't want anyone hurt! _As this conversation was going on, the mob had picked up Naruto by his shirt and tossed him into a nearby alley.

Sighing, **Fine, just don't expect me to bail you out like this. Sheesh, how do you expect to be a good shinobi without killing anyone?**

When Naruto opened his eyes again, they were now red, which made the mob freeze for a while as they figured the Kyubbi was loose again, which was what he wanted them to think.

Examining his hands and extending some new-grown claws he commented in a guttural voice, "**Ah, its nice to be free again." **Looking up at the terrified mob, "**Ah, fresh meat!"** At this, everybody tried all at once to run away, and most ended up getting in each other's way.

"**Now, now, I don't want to have to play with my food, my getting stuck in that brat's body has worked up quite an appetite." **Placing his hands against the ground, arms of earth suddenly erupted beneath the villagers and held some of the less unfortunate, keeping them from getting away.

Walking towards the captives, and with them getting more scared with every step, Naruto/Kyubbi grinned, "**Well, well, well. Not enough to satisfy me, but still, blood is blood, and I haven't felt blood on my claws for _years._" **Reaching out towards the first guy, he suddenly fainted from fear. Making a slight face, Kyubbi/Naruto reached out towards the next one, this time though, the Naruto consciousness inside felt the slight chakra jump between the finger and the person before the guy slumped unconscious, held up only by the earthy arms. Doing the same for each of the others, the Kyubbi then relinquished control to Naruto again.

Looking around with blue eyes again, they widened as they saw the results, five men lying unconscious and supported only by earthy arms holding their limbs. Dodging through the unconscious men, whom were stirring as he ran, Naruto ran all the way back home, and locked the door before talking to the Kyubbi.

_How…how did you do that?_ Naruto placed a beaten up kettle on the stove and turned it on.

**Do what? **The Kyubbi adopted an innocent tone.

Scowling as he watched the kettle for signs of steam, _You know what I'm talking about. How did you knock out those guys?_

**Oh that. **In a casual tone, the Kyubbi dismissed it, **It was nothing, just a small trick with chakra. I just forced chakra to jump from your finger to a small spot on the back of their neck.**

_…but, you were in front of them._

**I know, the chakra line went through their heads. **

_Aw, c'mon, teach me, teach me, teach me!_

Smiling at his eager young charge/vessel, **Alright, but remember our deal? You have to do everything I say, and right now I say that you are not ready for such precise chakra control. If I hadn't controlled my power perfectly, those guys would be dead right now. _Though I must admit, I didn't actually do anything to the first guy, hm, my presence must still be feared and hated. _**The Kyubbi grinned, **_Its nice to know that you're still respected, even after a dozen years of imprisonment._**

Swallowing at just how close he had been to killing someone, even if he wasn't in control of his body, Naruto almost didn't notice the kettle boiling, almost. Pouring the water into the waiting ramen cup, Naruto thought, _Damn, what would have happened if the Kyubbi didn't hold back?_

**The chakra would have blown up their heads, or at least fried their brains to a crisp. **Naruto jumped, he didn't expect an answer to that question. The Kyubbi added dryly, **Don't forget kit, I'm stuck inside you, I can hear and see every single thought that manages to pass through that puny blob you call a brain.**

_Shut up you damn fox! _Naruto looked back at the clock, another two minutes to go before his ramen was done.** You know kit, you should really eat something other than ramen, its not healthy. **

_SHUT UP!_

**Look, I'll do the best I can in making a great shinobi out of you, but there's only so much I can do without a good foundation, and that means good eating as well. I'm not talking about giving up ramen altogether, just eat more vegetables. If you don't, I won't be able to teach you some of the better jutsus.**

Grumbling at the thought, Naruto started to eat his finished ramen. _Alright, I'll go to the market tomorrow, and get some…some veggies. There, I said it._

**Don't forget the fruits as well kit.**

_Bleargh!_

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

A/N: Sorry this chapter is so short, I'll try to make the next ones longer to make up for it.


	4. A Fight, A Plan

A/N: Does anybody know a good site for Japanese/English translations for jutsu names and such? I really don't want to have to create second hand names for some new jutsus.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Nine months later…

Naruto walked down the streets towards the Academy, he was smiling, today was graduation day, and with Kyubbi's training, he was sure to pass! Happy as he was, almost oblivious to the world, he didn't notice the three masked shinobi. He did notice however, when a barrage of kunai and shruiken started to pierce his body.

Lying face down among a field of assorted ninja weaponry was a young boy, about eleven to twelve years old with blond hair and orange clothes. He was obviously dead, no human, no matter how strong, could have taken several dozen kunai and shruiken to their back and still live. No human.

"Not even a decent shinobi, to not notice _that _coming."

"Did we get the demon brat?"

"Sure looks like it. Hey, we just eliminated any future threat to the village from the Kyubbi. Do you think the Hokage will reward us?"

"Maybe, but look, I think he's moving,"

"Can't be, nobody could take that and still live. Probably just last minute death throes"

"But he's not human, he's a demon!"

"Still, for now, he's a human, and humans die…" The words from the last masked shinobi trailed off as the figure in the middle of the street painfully pulled himself up. All three hidden figures stared in silent shock as the demon brat started to yank kunai and shruiken out of his back and drop them one the ground while cursing all the time.

"Ouch! _CLINK! _ Ow! _CLANK! _Damn that hurts…"

"He's…he's not human!" one of them breathed.

_Damn, Kyubbi is going to have my hide for this, crap that hurts._

**Damn right I am, how in the nine levels of hell did you not notice that!**

_Um, I wasn't paying attention? Ouch. _ Naruto hoped against all hope that the Kyubbi wouldn't be mad at him.

**Damn right you weren't, and just for that, YOU CAN"T GRADUATE!**

_WHAT! THAT"S NOT FAIR!_

**War isn't fair kit, besides, ninja aren't people that are just going to walk up to your face and demand a straight out fight. Shinobis backstab, lie, trick, and deceive. They set up ambushes and traps, they try to outnumber you, shinobis will do anything to win, and if that means through dishonorable means, so be it. **

_BUT STILL…I haven't graduated in the past three years, and I really wanted to impress Iruka-sensei…_

In a some what kinder but still stern tone, **Kit, if, in the months I've taught you, you haven't learned enough to dodge such a simple attack, your teammates _will _die on your first serious mission. With my gift of regeneration, you probably won't die from such an attack, but your teammates will as they're trying to help you out as you recover. **

Damn… 

**Well…just a suggestion, but you could still fight those bastards who just 'killed' you… **

Grinning at the prospect of revenge, Naruto didn't notice the slight aura of red chakra that the Kyubbi pushed out. With heightened senses, Naruto located all three masked shinobi, then turning around and leaping into a tree, Naruto grinned in the manner of a wild animal, showing canine teeth that were longer than any human's had any right to be.

The other two were stunned that the demon child could locate one of them after that abysmal example of shinobi talent. Before they could do anything, they both heard several sounds of flesh meeting flesh, and occasionally, a choked off cry. Then before either of them could move, a body flew out of the tree and landed on a roof across the street. Another figure leaped out and followed the previous one, once he landed, his friends relaxed as they saw a figure masked and dressed all in black. Leaping towards their friend and landing next to him, they were surprised when he suddenly snapped both his arms out and cuffed them both under the chin. With both of them in the air, their friend turned towards the one on his left, and began to beat the crap out of him. The one on his right had the misfortune of being on his dominant side, and so was knocked off the roof and down several flights before crashing into the street.

Grinning at his handiwork, Naruto released the henge and hopped back down into the street, ignoring the broken flagstones where the other shinobi landed and the curious stared of the villagers; Naruto took off his jacket and proceeded to collect the kunai and shruiken left from the first attack. Examining some of them, Naruto raised an eyebrow, some, roughly a third, of the kunai, were of a very good make; they were of higher-quality metal, and had beaten edges that never needed to be honed, quite expensive but a great time-saver as these rarely had to be looked after much. The others were regulation shinobi equipment, well used and dull-looking, but still deadly when thrown. Most of the time, shinobis used the regular weapons as they were usually used and thrown within a few days. With this many good weapons around, it probably meant that one of his attackers belonged to a large and prestigious clan. _Crap! _If there was one thing Naruto didn't want, it was the observation of a strong clan.

Sighing, Naruto continued to pick up the weapons, making sure to pick up the good-quality ones though, and when his jacket was full, he stuffed weapons into his ninja pouch and his shruiken holster until he couldn't hold anymore. Slinging his heavy load over his shoulder, Naruto started to sprint the rest of the way to school. Smiling at the thought of all the metal he carried on him, Naruto thought that the one good thing of being hated for having the Kyubbi was the weapons that he could carry off when they were done. He often sold some of the worse ones to the nicer metal-workers for the price of the iron, the ones in better condition, he either kept for his ninja pouch, or wore them down in target practice before selling. His mind coming back from a land of figures and extra Ichraku ramen, Naruto frowned as he thought of the good kunai. _What am I supposed to do with these high-quality ones?_

**I have an idea.**

Jumping slightly at the Kyubbi's voice, Naruto left a branch slightly early and started to drop, starting to run as if nothing happened, Naruto yelled at the fox, _Don't do that! I have several dozen pointy objects that were just in my back if you don't know, and I would like to keep them out of my skin. Anyway, what's the idea?_

**Well, first I think you should let me take a look at one of the kunai. Just relax, and you may feel a slight pain in your right eye.**

Naruto stopped in front of the Academy, then yelped as pain suddenly flooded his right eye. Anyone that could see chakra would notice that a lot of chakra was suddenly concentrated into Naruto's right eye and was heading off towards his belly where it stopped, apparently right at nothing. The pain quickly subsided however, as his right eye turned red and the pupil became a slit. When he pulled his hands off his eye, the Kyubbi said **Ah, it's so nice to see color again. Kit, you should really redecorate that cell of mine, its so dark and dreary, no color except gray and black. Even you are a relief on the eye when you show up in orange.**

_Yeah, yeah, cut the chitchat, I'm going to be late for the exam!_

**That's not a bad idea, since you're supposed to fail, REMEMBER!**

_I remember, I remember, but I at least want to make a good impression with Iruka-sensei. Now, about those kunai…_

**Yeah, these are good-quality, steel if I'm not mistaken, hold on kit, this might hurt a bit…**

_Aaargh! What did you do to my hand you fox!_

**Don't worry, I just borrowed it, like I'm borrowing this eye, hold on…aaagh! DAMN! DAMN! Oooh, that smarts! Yeah, that's steel alright, almost pure if my burn is any indication.**

_WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY BODY YOU DAMN FURBALL!_

**This one time, I'll let the furball remark go. Now hold on for a minute. **Taking out a blank scroll, and taking control of the other hand, the Kyubbi cut Naruto's right hand then started to quickly draw figures over and over again on the scroll with the blood. When he was done, he started to place the weapons Naruto collected, one on each figure, and started explaining what he was doing. **Alright kit, quick lesson. Scrolls can be used for other things than just writing on. You can write certain ninjutsu or genjutsu on these, you can write one-time summoning contracts activated with blood or spit, and if you do it right, you can store items in characters, such as I'm doing now. People have found that it makes for easy carrying of large, otherwise unconcealable, weapons, or larger numbers of smaller ones. Now, what you do is write the character for the weapon's name, actually you could probably do this with any character but this makes it easier to seal as it is the actual name, and it allows you to know what weapon you want. Then you mold chakra into the shape of the character, imprint it on top of the item, and…there it is. **Naruto watched with shock as the weapons started to sink into the characters underneath. **And here's your body back.**

With a slight sensation of his right eye and hands going dead, then having blood rushing back in, Naruto staggered for a bit as his vision went blurry for a moment. Looking at his left hand, Naruto saw a slight burn mark that came from just touching the kunai to his skin.

_What happened to my hand?_

**I'll tell you later, right now, you're late for the test.**

Yelping in surprise, Naruto hurriedlypulled on his jacket, and grabbed the scroll, rolling it up as he ran. Sliding into the entrance, just as Iruka was about to close the door, Naruto ran in and sat down before he could be called as late.

Five minutes later, Naruto was bored out of his mind as Iruka started to talk to the class about the Shinobi code and all it's rules. Calling upon the Kyubbi in his head, Naruto started to pester it.

**Kit, if you don't stop this soon, I will never teach you anything again!**

Horrified at such low threat below the belt, Naruto reluctantly stopped bothering the Kyubbi, then something hit him. _Kyubbi?_

Grumbling at losing his sleep, **What?**

_What were you going to do with those new steel kunai?_

Sleep was forgotten as the Kyubbi warmed up to the subject. **Oh that. Well, have you ever heard about imbuing a weapon with an element?**

_Huh?_

Sighing at his vessel's incompetence, **It's when you take an element, say katon, and capture some of it's essence into a weapon, which would allow you to use katon jutsus when you're wielding it, no hand seals, just chakra pushed into the weapon, and suddenly, your opponent has a karyuu endan to deal with. Naturally, lots of people want them but it takes you guys a _real _long time to make, since seals have to be carved into it in every step, and naturally, they are quite expensive. **

_So what does that have to do with those kunai? They're already fully made, and I'm not one for waiting._

Chuckling **_The kit's getting smarter. _**Out loud in Naruto's mind though the Kyubbi said, **Well, we demons aren't known for much patience either, so me and a few other demons devised a shortcut. The only problem was, that you need _very _good quality metal, or otherwise the essence would be too much for the metal to handle and it would shatter or break. However, anybody that's a full demon can't touch steel in any of it's forms, and we needed pure or almost-pure steel for the jutsu to work.**

_Cool! Why can't you touch steel though?_

**I don't know, nobody does, but some demonic beings can't touch certain types of metal. You're lucky that you have a higher-class demon sealed in you though, I've heard nasty stories of some half-wolf demons farther west, and they're proper half-demons, not humans with a full demon sealed in them, beings with a demon and a human for parents, bloody wolves are in heat half the year and go to a _human_ for respite. Ah well, anyway, they usually look normal, but the light of the full moon force them to change into something roughly half-way, not fully wolf, but not human either, those are the lucky ones. Most look like humans for the major part of the month, but some are…leaning more towards the wolf side you could say. Some look halfway all times of the month, and others have it backwards. All of them are vulnerable to silver though, so it's a good tip to have something silver on you if you plan on killing one. **

Naruto was so engrossed in Kyubbi's explanation that Iruka had to call Naruto's name several times before it registered in the blond's mind.

"Naruto!"

"NARUTO!"

"Huh? Wha? What Iruka-sensei?"

"Naruto, it's your turn for the graduation exam, you're last." Looking around, Naruto saw that everybody had left one by one for the exam and, due to his name, was last. Shrugging, Naruto sauntered out and down the hallway towards the exam room. When he got there, both Iruka and Mizuki were waiting.

"Alright Naruto, show us your bunshin no jutsu. Create three clones of yourself."

**Remember kit, you became vulnerable, so you fail.**

_And if I try to pass?_

The Kyubbi grinned**, Don't, you won't like the consequences, and I'm flooding your chakra system so you can't control it.**

Naruto grumbled, now that that damn fox mentioned it, he could feel his chakra fluctuating madly, some times it was painfully full, and other times he could feel only a trickle. Both Iruka and Mizuki must have felt the fluctuating, but Naruto figured they would put it down as nervousness and they did. Trying anyway, "Bunshin no jutsu!"

What appeared could only be described as pitiful. Naruto created only one clone that was almost entirely a bluish tinge, and lying on the ground like a rag doll. Naruto gagged, and tried not to laugh at his own pitiful attempt, it even had foam coming out at the mouth! Naturally, Iruka and Mizuki would fail him, but there was always that slight chance…

"Naruto," said Iruka.

"Yeah?" asked Naruto hopefully.

"YOU FAIL!"

When everybody else got their leaf hitae-ate, Naruto sat alone on the swing, slightly depressed and only half-listening at the adult's remarks.

_Aw damn, I really wanted to pass to. Now I'm stuck in the Academy for another year! Crap! I already learned this stuff, and will anybody take a twice-failed genin for their team?_

Slightly sad at his vessel's thoughts, in an attempt to cheer him up, **Hey kit, I'll teach you a new jutsu tonight…**

_Really? Alright! _Brightening up tremendously, Naruto jumped off and started to find a roof to sit on while the Kyubbi started to grin again at the easiness and abruptness in changing his vessel's mood. _Ok, I'm ready, so teach me this new jutsu!_

**You know kit, this isn't any low-level jutsu, so listen carefully… **The Kyubbi's voice trailed off as Mizuki's started to become louder, Naruto's face became dejected again, except this time it was at the interruption of a jutsu lesson.

"Hey Naruto"

"Hey…"

"I'm sure Iruka didn't mean to be so harsh on you."

"Hm."

"Well, you know that Iruka didn't have any parents growing up, so he grew up alone and feeling the consequences. He knows what its like to grow up alone but he wants you to grow up strong as well."

"Yeah, I guess, but I still wanted to pass."

Looking sideways at Naruto, Mizuki began, "Well, I guess there's no helping it…" and with that, he began to outline his plan to Naruto.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

A/N: I've been asked the ever vital question of pairings and I thought maybe slight NaruHina. I also figure that maybe after the main story plot, I might continue this in a sequel with more fighting. Any takers? If so, I hope to be done within twenty to thirty chapters, hopefully I'll be able to fit this story in, I have a tendency to run on a bit.

If not, I'll just kill this, and start without the first chapter and under a new title, and type more fights in. Vote on this please.


	5. Trust And Deceit

A/N: Due to complaints, I will not have NaruHina. Instead, I have decided on no pairings for this story, maybe I'll put pairings in a sequel…

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

_Why am I doing this again?_

**Because you wanted to, and I said so kit, so shut up!**

Naruto sighed, and started to wish that he had never heard of this plan.

Flashback…

Naruto started to drift off under the droning of words from Mizuki. _Gah, this is stupid, I could be doing something useful, like learning that new jutsu._

Kit! Pay attention! This is a great opportunity!

_What! He just wants me to rip off a scroll from the Hokage for him!_

So? Who says that you can't read that scroll before he finds you?

_Why would I want to?_

Kit, if this sniveling bastard wants it so bad as to resort to a twice-failed student, it must be powerful. Might even contain some forbidden jutsus…

At the word jutsu, Naruto's mind automatically started to pay attention

"…and then you meet me _there, _in the forest. Got it?"

"Um, Mizuki-sensei, could you repeat the instructions?

"Kami-sama…Ok, but pay attention this time Naruto…"

End Flashback…

Remembering all those forbidden jutsus that he could learn though, Naruto's mind practically started to salivate at the thought. Would it be some kick-ass katon jutsu? Or maybe a jutsu to destroy enemies with just a flick. Or maybe…_Rustle. _The sound of the guard changing brought Naruto's mind back to the real world.

_Alright, here I go!_

Wait, kit! Naruto's body froze from sheer force of habit; whenever he didn't do just what the fox said, the Kyubbi usually just increased his training regime. Naruto then started to sweat, partially because of nervousness, but mostly because of the kunai that just passed not an inch in front of him. Completely silent and motionless, Naruto could hear the guards rustling around the trees where he perched. When they left, he started to silently thank the fox over and over again for making him bring a camouflage blanket.

You're welcome, now get that scroll!

Sneaking his way into the top of the Hokage tower, Naruto inched down the hallways, and down the stairs, always careful not to make a noise. Turning the last corner, he was almost to where Mizuki said the scroll room was when he heard a voice call out, "What are you doing here Naruto?"

_Shit! _Freezing, Naruto recognized it as the old man's voice._WhatdoIdo? WhatdoIdo? Wait! What about that jutsu…_

Kit, no. I know you're proud of you're first original jutsu, but it's useless right now!

_We'll see about that… _Turning around quickly, he turned around and called, "Sexy no Jutsu!" Turning into a beautiful foxy-and naked-lady, Naruto got the desired effect when the Hokage suddenly had a nosebleed knocking him back several yards. When Naruto turned back, a grin could be seen on his face, _Haha! Useless is it? Not even the Hokage is immune to my perverted jutsu!_ Hearing the Kyubbi muttering about perverted old men and training regimes, Naruto decided that it would have been a good idea then not to push his luck.

When Naruto opened the door to the scroll room, his grin died a little. With all the rumors about the forbidden powerful jutsu that were said to be locked up here, Naruto expected quite a bit more then a small room of large, dusty scrolls. _What the hell? I thought they would be in special cases of gold and jewels and have all types of security jutsus on them! These are musty scrolls in a room that looks like it hasn't been opened in years! _

Kit, don't complain! This is great! Wait, don't touch anything yet!

Naruto's arm froze from his attempt to grab the nearest scroll. _Eh?_

There might yet be alarm jutsus on them! Quick, let me use your body for a while!

Naruto complied and let the Kyubbi start driving his body. Kyubbi/Naruto closed his eyes and made the seal of the tiger._ Hey, what's that seal for?_

Still with his eyes closed, A doujutsu I have, remind me to teach it to you some day, since it allows you to see chakra, like the Sharingan and Byukugan. Shut up for a second, will ya? Opening his eyes, Kyubbi/Naruto looked at the scrolls, then at the shelves, then at the room in general. Crap, we're in trouble! 

_Wha? What is it? What's wrong?_

**No time to explain, just be quiet!** Frantically looking at the shelves, Kyubbi/Naruto looked for the Scroll of Forbidden Seals. Finding it, the Kyubbi was about to depart when his eyes trailed over a pair of large, very old scrolls bound together, and a smaller one set on top. They were slightly set apart from the rest, but that wasn't what caught his eye. What did was the Uzumaki spiral seal on all three. Thinking quickly, Kyubbi/Naruto shoved the smaller scroll into his Ninja pouch, stuck the bound scrolls on his back, and held onto the Scroll of Forbidden Seals with his left arm. Suddenly he froze, and then struggled until his claws were fully extended on his right hand, waving it around like he was trying to slice an invisible enemy, Kyubbi/Naruto's progress was slowed to a jog. That stopped when he got outside though, but by then, guards had started to come out of nowhere. Only until he was clear of the Hokage tower and safe in the forest did Kyubbi start to answer Naruto's frantic _What's happening?_'s though he never stopped moving.

**Whew. We got away.**

_What the hell happened back there? We were safe! There was no alarm!_

**Idiot! It was a silent alarm jutsu! And man was it big! It took up the entire goddamn room! Whoever put it there was definitely good, very subtle, and very strong to for it to go on for as long as it had.**

_Huh?_

Sighing at his container's lack of worldly knowledge, the Kyubbi decided to be nice and give his charge a jutsu lesson. **Ok, kit! Listen up! Alarm jutsus are very hard to make, you need lots of preparation, lots of chakra and control, and they only work once, so not many people use them too much. They're very complicated jutsus, but they are essentially, chakra lines that are wrapped around both what you want protect, and where you want it protected, or just around the scroll if you want to keep if from being read without you're knowing. However, when they do activate, what pretty much happens is, all that chakra you put into it? It becomes something like a one-way explosive tag, whatever you want protected won't get hurt, but whomever tries to open it is now a steaming pile of ashes along with whatever else happens to be in the immediate area, and whatever you want protected is now enclosed in a solid shield of chakra, and giving off a signal in a preset pattern, allowing you to find it if need be.**

_So why didn't that happen to you when you took those scrolls, Kyubbi-sensei?_

_**Huh, 'Kyubbi-sensei' I could get used to that… **_**I told you before kit, it was a silent alarm jutsu. They were made specifically for museums, libraries, and archives, when an explosion might destroy the thief, but also everything else in the room. They don't work like regular alarm jutsus, they're set off with a chakra tripwire or something of that sort, and they're usually a lot nastier than just explosions. When you activate one by touching it, they stick to you, some try to slow you down a little, like weights, others drain you of chakra. The one in the scroll room looked more like a huge chakra web; you would've been screwed if I hadn't cut it.**

_How is getting your chakra sucked out worse than getting blown up into a thousand pieces?_

**Death by explosion is pretty bad, death by chakra depletion is much, much worse; the explosions are usually painless unless you try to block it, and even then it just takes a few seconds for the heat to fry you. When you get all the chakra in you sucked out though…remember how you feel after a long day of training? **

_Um…_

**Tired?**

_Yeah._

**Weak?**

_Yeah._

**Slightly hungry?**

_Yea-Hey, how did you know that?_

**Chakra depletion is like a hastened version of starving yourself to death. Your body uses chakra for many other things than jutsus, one such thing is to help your heart beat, no chakra, your heart gets weaker, then stops completely, if your other organs don't die first.**

_That doesn't sound too bad._

**Oh yeah? What do you think keeps your stomach acid in your stomach? How would it feel if a lung failed in a matter of minutes? **

Urrgh, that sounds painful. 

**Kit, the body has many ways in which it can kill itself, remind me to teach you some ways to make them happen when you want them to. **

_Um, I don't really want to kill anybody._

**_Kami-sama…kit, how do you expect to be a shinobi without taking other's lives? _Fine, you can adjust them to just pain and discomfort then, still useful in battle. Good we're here, I'll set up the genjutsu, you do your part, remember?**

_Yeah, yeah._

**Good. _Damn, genjutsus are hard to do with this body; I'll have to find out why soon. Hm, might as well hide these Uzumaki clan scrolls while I'm at it. _Here's your body back, NOW GET TO WORK! I'm going to sleep.**

Grumbling at slave-driving kitsune demons, but knowing the Kyubbi's genjutsu would only last half an hour at most, Naruto hurried up. He opened the scroll to it's full length, and took out a camera, Naruto started to quickly and accurately take pictures of the entire scroll, using up two rolls of film to make sure he got the whole thing. When he was done, Naruto was about to roll the scroll back up when he remembered the lesson the Kyubbi gave him just that morning. _Hm, if you can hide items in a word, could you hide words under words? I wonder…_Quickly remembering his lesson on how to push chakra into a non-living object; Naruto bathed his hands in his chakra, and then quickly ran them down the characters all the way down the scroll. When he was done, he was slightly disappointed; the scroll looked exactly the same. That disappointment vanished, however, when he picked up the scroll to roll it up again and found there to be another unrolled scroll underneath the first. Trying, and failing, to suppress a huge grin, Naruto started to roll up the first scroll, and then he noticed that it had characters on the other side as well. That was when he really lost it.

"ALRIGHT!" Waking up a very annoyed demon fox, Naruto quickly informed him of his findings.

Any feelings of irritation at being woken up early quickly disappeared when Naruto showed the fox the new two pages of text. **Wha, really, are you serious? Show me! **Secretly the Kyubbi had never expected Naruto to show this level of intelligence, but he wasn't about to ruin the young boy's mood now. **Kit, this is great, how many rolls of film you have left?**

Naruto quickly rummaged through his ninja pouch. _Um, one. _

**Damn, I'll have to use that jutsu, I hate that one…Use the last roll to take pictures of the second page, don't save, I'll show you a jutsu when you're out of film.**

Naruto complied, and started to take pictures of the other side, when he was about half way done, the Kyubbi instructed him in a new jutsu.

**Alright kit, the seals for this are horse, dog, ox, horse and dog. Do the seals, and then position your hands so it looks like a picture frame, you know, thumb and forefingers of both hands. Aim so what you want to see is in the picture frame, then focus chakra into an even layer between your fingers, hold the image of the picture with a chakra over layer, and then project it onto another surface. It'll take some chakra control, but what should happen is that it'll make a copy of whatever you want to take a picture at, originally invented to hasten the process of scouting. **

Naruto tried the jutsu a few times, and projected it on the ground to test it. Once the Kyubbi had deemed it clear enough, Naruto took out several blank scrolls, gave a silent prayer to Kami-sama for bringing some, then proceeded to copy the rest of the text.

When he was finished, Naruto quickly put the scrolls together like he had found it, and was mildly surprised to see a flash of blue, then a single scroll, no seams to show where the other scroll had been. Wasting no time, Naruto rolled up his 'picture jutsus' hid them in a tree along with his camera, and then jumped off to where Mizuki had told him to meet. Along the way, he heard lots of shouts and noises, and figured that there must be shinobis after him. Thinking that he would need a good alibi, Naruto quickly grabbed the scroll of his back, and proceeded to memorize the first thing he saw, Kage Bunshin no jutsu. Rolling the scroll back up and sticking it back on his back, Naruto started to practice the art of making solid, shadow clones.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"Alright, you all know Naruto has the forbidden scroll, go find him!"

"HAI!" With a wave of his arm, the Hokage dismissed the ranks of ninjas in front of him. _Naruto…what have you done? If you unleash the Kyubbi…well I hope that genjutsu on him has worn off by now. _Feeling slightly uneasy, the Hokage went back to his office. Opening his desk, he pulled out a secret item of the Hokage, his crystal ball. Using it, he began to search the forest for Naruto's distinctive double chakra signature. He found it, but it looked like it was in a tree or something…sighing, Sarutobi sat back and rubbed his temple; knowing Naruto's abysmal lack of chakra control and knowledge of high-level genjutsu-not even he knew this one!-he could only conclude that the Kyubbi helped him somehow, which meant that he had at least partial control over Naruto's body at the moment. With the seals shown in the forbidden scroll, the Kyubbi could let himself loose again! Sighing, the Hokage was about to get up and order that all shinobis kill Naruto on sight, when he noticed movement. Rushing back to his crystal ball, the Hokage saw that the genjutsu was disappearing, but Naruto's chakra signature was no longer there. Looking around and finding it again, he peered in, and smiled satisfactory, both of Naruto's eyes were their usual blue, his hands didn't have any claws, and none of his limbs were bathed in red chakra. Looks like Naruto was still Naruto. Satisfied, Sarutobi walked out of his office and down to the entrance to wait for Naruto, though in doing so, he missed the part when there were suddenly three Naruto's, then when two of them disappeared into smoke soon after.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

_Naruto, where are you? _This was the thought that kept running through Iruka's head. Ever since he heard the young boy was missing, he had joined the search for him, knowing that the others might not be as kind as him to the poor kid. Spotting orange in a clearing, Iruka changed course and left towards the clearing.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Puffing with exhaustion, Naruto smiled. He was lying on his back in a small clearing, the scroll beside him, and smiling a happy smile. He had finally got it! His early attempts at it were pretty good, if one ignored the fact that they disappeared almost right after he called them, but they had still been a huge drain on his chakra. When he remembered the small footnote at the end though, where it said "Note: Clones need large amounts of chakra, but clones are thereafter self-sustaining." After that, he started to pump massive amounts of chakra into each attempt, and started getting perfect clones. All of that was far from his mind though, when Iruka-sensei suddenly appeared upside-down.

"Hey Naruto, now what have you been up to?"

Pointing at him, "Hey Iruka-sensei! Why are you upside down? Cool jutsu though."

"IDIOT! You're upside down!"

Grinning, Naruto replied, "Oh yeah," getting up, Iruka noticed how dirty Naruto looked. _Was he training here all night…_

"Hey Iruka-sensei! I learned a cool new jutsu! Let me show you…"Everything was interrupted though, as Iruka shoved him out of the way and a barrage of kunai hit him.

Iruka started to yank kunai out of himself, then looked for who threw them, "Ugh, Mizuki!"

Naruto looked at where Iruka was staring, and saw that it was indeed Mizuki-sensei. "Huh? Wha? Hey, what's going on?"

"Hey Naruto!" he called, "why don't you give me that scroll now, eh?"

"No Naruto!" Iruka yelled, "Don't five him that scroll! Protect it with your life!"

Naruto raised an eyebrow, so the scroll was that important huh? Well that just meant there must be something valuable in that scroll. _Yes! I scored big this time! _

"Hey, c'mon Naruto," Wheedled Mizuki, "Give me that scroll, I'm your friend right? Iruka's lying; he hates you like everybody else. _I_ told you about that scroll, _I_ can teach you how to use the techniques it contains." _Yeah right I'm giving you this scroll. _Iruka-sensei always treated everybody fairly, including him, and he always treated Naruto to ramen after he did something well. Mizuki-sen, no, Mizuki, was a bastard, he even smelled like snakes. And he never seemed to be wearing his leaf hitae-ate as much as he should have. He was damned if he was going to give him the scroll.

Frowning at Naruto's resolve, Mizuki played his trump card. "Hey Naruto! You know why everybody hates you so much?"

"Huh?" Distracted, and not used to such abrupt changes in conversation, Naruto responded as best as he could.

Horrified at what Mizuki was going to tell him, Iruka yelled, "Mizuki, don't!"

Taking Naruto's 'huh' as a positive answer, Mizuki continued, "It's because of the Kyubbi. Everybody says that it was destroyed, right? Wrong! The Kyubbi couldn't be defeated, it was too strong. So it was sealed into the body of a newborn child! You! That's why everybody hates you so much! You were the Kyubbi! You destroyed friends and family, even Iruka there hates you if he was truthful enough to admit it!"

Naruto's mind had finally caught up to the conversation, and was slightly amused at Mizuki's ramblings. Ever since he learned that he had the Kyubbi inside of him, he was always careful in making new acquaintances. When Iruka-sensei had first offered him ramen, Naruto was always aware for the first sign of hate. It had never shown on his face. Iruka-sensei had truly wanted to be his friend, he cried when he finally realized it, and was forever grateful to him for it. As such, he now wanted to hurt this man that was standing before him and slandering his first and only human friend.

**Kit, I have an idea. How about…**

Smiling grimly, Naruto started to slowly walk towards Mizuki. Iruka looked on in horror as Mizuki's demented grin got bigger and bigger. Finally, Naruto reached the base of the tree that Mizuki was standing on and turned around to face Iruka, a small frown on his face, and then he grinned. Naruto made the cross seal required for the jutsu he learned, and yelled, "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"

Suddenly there were a hundred clones in the surrounding area, one of them shoved Mizuki off his branch, then the rest started to beat the crap out of him. Silently watching for half a minute, Naruto then canceled his clones, and walked over a highly beaten up Mizuki and smiled at an astounded Iruka. "Heh heh, I guess I overdid it a little."

_He created a hundred solid flesh-and-blood clones. That's the highest caliber ninjutsu. But when did he… _"Hey Naruto."

"Yeah?"

"When did you find out about the Kyubbi?"

"Huh? Oh, at the beginning of the school year. He told me himself, we've been talking for the past nine months."

Smiling at the unsaid statement, Iruka knew that if Naruto had been able to communicate with the Kyubbi, the demon kitsune would have been training Naruto all the time for the past nine months. Saying, "Naruto, come here for a minute, close your eyes, I want to give you something."

Confused, Naruto did what he was told. He felt something come and go, then heard Iruka saying that he could open his eyes now. Staring at Iruka, he saw his smiling face, then his goggles in his hands, "Congratulations Naruto," he was saying, "You pass."

Naruto was at first confused, then quickly asked the Kyubbi, _Can I pass? Can I? Can I?_

The fox was secretly proud at how fast his container had picked up two high-level ninjutsus in one night, so he said, **Ok.**

**"**Alright!" Naruto yelled, "I passed, I passed! Hey Iruka-sensei? Can we get some ramen?"


	6. Iruka's Speech

A/N: Just a little fun.  Tell me if it's any good

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

_Hey Kyubbi!_

**What?**

_When are you gonna teach me that jutsu you said that you would last night?_

**Well, I did teach you _a _high-level jutsu yesterday, so I think never would be a good answer.**

_WHAT! YOU…YOU…JUTSU HOARDER!_ The Kyubbi's raucous laughter echoed through the hallways of Naruto's mind. Muttering about bastard foxes and miserly teachers, Naruto entered the hall where the newly appointed genins met. He met some questioning, but he just pointed to his hiate-ate and was let in, though reluctantly.

Sitting in the back with some other raven-haired kid in a blue shirt, he just mostly ignored everybody, when a girl rudely asked to get past him, he just sighed, stood up, and _accidentally _tripped her with one of his chair legs. He even tried to help her up but she just ignored him and even told him to shove off. _Sigh. _There was just no helping some people was there?

Eventually, his mind started thinking about various pranks that he could pull off on Iruka-sensei, he just sighed and dismissed that thought almost as soon as it came. Iruka-sensei did him a lot of favors over the year, and passing him even after he failed the genin exam twice was kind of him. What would it look like when he, Uzumaki Naruto, future Hokage of Konoha, thanked him for all that hard work by making Iruka-sensei look like a fool one last time? Of course, deciding not to play any pranks meant that there was nothing for his mind to do, even the Kyubbi was asleep at the moment and probably wouldn't like Naruto disturbing his rest for requests for new jutsus.

_Kami-sama…this is so boring, when is Iruka-sensei getting here?_

As if on cue, Iruka just then entered the room with some sheets of paper. He took the center, and started a speech on how important the values of a shinobi. Since he failed last year, Naruto had already heard this speech several times in many different forms, and had pretty much slept through all of them but the first. This time around though, Naruto heard a strain of seriousness in the speech and actually paid attention to the words for the first time in three years. Iruka, of course, noticed Naruto take a sudden interest and automatically exercised his teaching instinct to make sure this wasn't some elaborate going-away prank by him. For the next three minutes that Iruka was speaking, sweat could be seen dotting his temple, as he started to casually sweep his eyes back and forth as far as they would go, and emit a fairly large amount of chakra to surround him entirely so as to get some slight warning if anything went flying at him. He was calm on the outside, but inside, he was panicking, he didn't want to leave a bad impression with his students, and if anything funny happened to him then, in that somber moment, he was going to _kill _Naruto. Unfortunately, his chakra field amplified that panic and slight killing intent until it started to affect some of the students sitting closer to him. Of course, having all this happening while he got through the part of valiant deaths and dying for the mission and the country didn't help the students feel calm very much.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto was confused, why was Iruka-sensei glaring at everybody, and what was with that large, almost sinister, chakra field that he was emitting? Could it be some kind of post-graduation ritual? Having the teachers test the new genins one more time? Wanting to find out what was going on, Naruto redoubled his concentration, staring at Iruka intently.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Why did Naruto look so confused just then? Could it be that his prank wasn't working? Relaxing slightly, Iruka continued on through a small paragraph of rewards and honors for finishing a mission, and didn't notice the small sound of various breaths coming out. It came as quite a surprise then, when Iruka looked up again, and saw Naruto looking back at him with twice the levels of intensity. Iruka redoubled his efforts to be on guard for any pranks coming his way, and started on the next few paragraphs, the ones about how serious a shinobi should take their duties. His chakra field started to almost glow into the visible spectrum; it was filled to the brim with killing intent.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto smiled, he had finally figured it out; Iruka did his scary chakra thing almost every time he came to parts dealing with punishment and disloyalty. Probably one last lesson before the genins were sent into the world as official ninjas. Having satisfied his curiosity, Naruto just sat back, and enjoyed the effects the 'speech' was having on his fellow classmates.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

_WHAT! _Naruto was smiling, and sitting back in a relaxed manner. Was his prank already done? Impossible, Iruka would have felt at least a disturbance in his chakra field. But still…_NARUTO, _was smiling, and relaxed, he usually only did that when a prank that made was done, and the victim was now highly embarrassed and wished that he or she could sink into the ground and stay there, or if the victim was so far into his trap, he couldn't get out. He still didn't feel a thing, so that meant only one thing.

Glaring intently straight ahead at Naruto in the last row, Iruka backed up some until his back was touching the board-it was clean, he was sure it was clean, he saw it when he came in-Iruka assured himself that whatever prank Naruto was going to pull would now miss. He was sure that Naruto hadn't planned for him to back up like that. But just incase…

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto's eyebrow rose, Iruka did the unexpected and stepped back, until he was up against the wall. Well, chakra depletion did make you feel weak, and in doing so, Iruka could now glare at everybody without having to turn his head or eyes. Naruto's smile became a grin. Damn Iruka-sensei was good,it almost seemed that he was staring right at him…

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Why did Naruto just start to grin like that? _Crap, crap, crap! _ Iruka was in for it now, he could almost feel it, a leaden feeling in his bones, becoming tired as his body itself started to accept its eventual fate at being a laughing stock. Well, Naruto wouldn't be able to get off that easily.

Iruka started to grin wildly, he crossed his arms, stood straight as he could, and started to emit killing intent from every pore of his body, which did wonders for his now overwhelming chakra field. He didn't need to read from the page now, his speech was coming to a close, and knowing Naruto, he would be humiliated at the very end, a short two paragraphs away, right after the one about punishments and consequences for becoming missing-nins.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto's respect for Iruka-sensei had risen several notches in the past few minutes. Who knew that he had this in him? For the past five minutes, Iruka-sensei had been giving off, almost continuously, ever-growing amounts of chakra, even now, his killing intent fairly radiated off his body. Even if this was a lesson, it was a damn good one, the best one Naruto had been given all year. It wasn't fair, they gave the best lesson to the ones that had already graduated.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Finishing up, Iruka started to let the chakra and killing intent go, there was no prank, Naruto hadn't embarrassed him in front of all these shinobi-to-be's. Finally starting to feel the effects of using so much chakra, Iruka felt that he was supported only by the board ledge that propping up the bottom of his chunnin vest. Managing to read the lists of team members, he dismissed all of the students while barely looking at him. If he had, he might have noticed that most of them were pale and were slightly puffing. Very few were fully alright, Naruto was one of them, and when passed Iruka, he whispered, "Nice job," Iruka just looked at him like he had no idea what he was talking about, Naruto just grinned back. When the last student had left, though, he allowed himself to slump from exhaustion.

"Damn…" Iruka heard someone. Lifting his head, he saw that the entire teacher faculty was at his door, peering in. Every one of their faces had the exact same mixture of awe and wonder. They were all trying to find the source of that huge chakra, and found themselves listening to the most moving graduation speech they had every felt or heard. Iruka closed his eyes and rested his head back on the wall.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Iruka's Speech, as it was known in later years, eventually became famous among the entire teaching faculty and jounin instructors. It then became a tradition for the Academy to have the current teacher of the graduating year use Iruka's methods to turn the Graduation speech into a last lesson, forever engrained into the ninjas of Konoha. It is generally agreed that the original effect of Iruka's Speech was overwhelming, but Iruka and the other teachers never managed to fully recapture the full effect of the first speech.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

A/N: Hahahahahaha! R&R please!


	7. Teams and Eyes

A/N: Sorry for the long break, to make up for it, I made this one extra long. Well, actually, this one was just a very long one. I still need a Japanese/English translator site though. Please, does anybody know a site?

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto was bored, he was very bored, and he was very irritated as well. He was assigned to Team 7, with that annoying pink-haired kunoichi he met earlier, and that broody raven-haired guy sitting near him. Where was the damn instructor? Naruto really wanted to get his film developed so he could find out what was on it

The kunoichi was nothing but trouble, that was evident from the way she fawned over the other guy and kept trying to start a conversation for the past three hours. The other guy though…Naruto knew he was strong. Mr. Top-of-the-Class had sat for three hours straight through that annoying kunoichi's pleads for conversation, and did nothing more than blink and stare off into space. Naruto was impressed; he was pretty sure that he'd crack after the first thirty minutes and start yelling at what's-her-name to shut up, and that was when he was trying.

Naruto hadn't lost three hours of his life for nothing though; his first hour was spent rigging a chain reaction of pranks and traps for their bastard of a jounin-instructor. Then he had bugged the Kyubbi into teaching him some more jutsus, though he had only gotten two out of him-the stingy jutsu miser that he was-he had to admit, they sounded pretty decent and the effects sounded pretty cool. Now though, Naruto had already gotten all the jutsus out of the Kyubbi for the week, had already practiced them till he could do them in his sleep, and his instructor _still _wasn't here! Sighing, Naruto pulled out a scroll with instructions on the usage of poisons and where they naturally occurred and started studying.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Sasuke was bored, though he didn't show it. In his mind was only two things, how strong his teammates were against him, and how much stronger he needed to get to surpass hi brother. He had already figured the kunoichi to be totally useless, or worse, a hindrance to their group, the other one though…he was interesting. He heard that he was dead last in the class, and that he had failed the genin examination two times, including this year, so how was he here now? He was proficient in traps though, Sasuke had to admit that when he saw the myriad of pain the victim would go through, and that was in a classroom with limited and nonlethal elements, he wondered what he would do in battle situations. No matter, he was good in traps but that seemed all he was good in, he'd seen his results in target practice, his shruiken hit the outer rings sometime, usually they just grazed the target, and his aim with a kunai was abysmal at best. Well, he did have good aim, if he managed to throw correctly, most of the time the kunai hit ring first, sometimes even sideways. Was that even possible? And his outfit…orange jacket, orange pants, and he hadn't even bothered to cover his bright blond hair; any halfway decent shinobi would have spotted him on even the darkest of nights. No, he was definitely weak.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

_Oh Kami-sama…Am I dreaming? I'm actually on a team with _the _Uchiha Sasuke! I can't believe it! I'm with the 'heartthrob' Uchiha! Beat that Ino-pig! _Sakura's thoughts were mostly that for the first five minutes. Afterwards, she focused mainly on trying to pry a discernable sound out of the Uchiha; she had tried for three hours straight and failed to get him to respond with anything more than blinking. Casting her eyes around for more subjects to talk about, no matter how lame, Sakura noticed the traps that her other teammate had built. Of course she had noticed them before, two hours ago while he was building them, but now…Sakura was slightly intrigued, casting her eyes around the room, she noticed other traps and was slightly impressed with the intricacy that they showed. _What was his name again? Naruto!_ _Naruto was definitely a specialist in placing traps; then again, I've heard that he was always the prankster so this probably came from years of practice, usually at the cost of someone else. _Sakura looked over at him, slightly amused as his nonchalant attitude with his feet on his desk and at his face placed in a frown as he studied the scroll that was laid on his lap. His hands held the ends of the scroll so Sakura couldn't read it. Naruto then shifted slightly, allowing Sakura a quick glimpse at the title on the back. She gave a slight gasp, _Is that what I think it is?_ Curiosity got the better of her, and she called out, "Naruto? What's that scroll that you're reading?"

Naruto glanced up, then held up the scroll so she could see the title, "Introduction to Throwing Weaponry" Holding it up for a full three seconds, Naruto stared at her, watching her for any sign of reaction.

Sakura just stared, she could have sworn that she saw a high-level medical scroll on poisons, but he had just held up his scroll for the world to see…and it taught basic abilities that every genin needed! Her face stayed impassive for several moments, then her rage at the impossibility of what she was seeing got loose. "WHAT THE HELL! YOU CAN'T EVEN THROW A KUNAI!"

Secretly, Naruto was relieved, _Whew, I thought she saw what I had here, thank Kami for the Henge. _Out loud, Naruto retorted indignantly , "I can to throw a kunai!" then mumbling a bit, "I just don't always hit the target point first."

"Gah! How did you ever pass the genin exam!" she retorted. She knew she had hit a nerve there when his face twitched slightly, triumphant, she followed up, "I knew it! Iruka-sensei felt sorry for you, so he passed you even after you failed twice!"

Glaring the pink-haired kunoichi, Naruto quickly rolled up his scroll, put it away, then stomped on his desk and spoke, with great menace, "Shut up. I became a genin through hard work, despite my short comings, and Iruka-sensei passed me because he judged me worthy of this hitae-ate."

Retorting, "Oh? Then what did you do to have Iruka-sensei judge you worthy of a leaf hitae-ate?"

Naruto remained silent, his face not moving as his eyes peered into hers-and she could almost feel his ice-blue eyes sizing her up, taking measurements and performing calculations. Finally, his mouth said, "Listen to the rumors, then ask Iruka-sensei." Startled, Sakura looked back at him questionably, while Naruto got off his desk and fell asleep. Shrugging it off as him being dramatic, Sakura went back to fawning over Sasuke.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

A silver-haired jounin stared at the mess in front of him. The Hokage waited silently, his aged face expressionless as he watched the jounin look around the small and shabby apartment. Returning to the table, he picked up a discarded carton of milk, and silently noted that it was expired. Walking into the kitchen, he opened the cabinets, and saw rows upon rows of ramen. Opening the refrigerator, he noted with some surprise that there were some fresh fruit vegetables inside, closing it, and opening the ramen cabinets again, he noticed that a about half of them were green, picking one up, he saw that it was vegetable-flavored. He looked over at the Hokage, a silent statement in his one visible eye. The Hokage nodded and answered, "I know it's weird Kakashi,"

"It kind of goes beyond weird; this kid is a ramen addict, and a slob, which should mean that he's an unhealthy eater, so why does he have fresh fruit and vegetable-flavored ramen?"

The Hokage nodded, "I know, I've been trying for years to get the kid to eat anything _but _ramen, and he just whines and protests as loudly as possible, especially if its healthy. Then something-or more likely, some_one-_just comes along and he suddenly stops by the market every few days to pick up some fruits and veggies." Then the Hokage merely looked at Kakashi, though he felt it more as a glare, "This is why I want you to teach him Kakashi, I want you to find out who is having this much influence over Naruto." Kakashi merely nodded, then disappeared in a poof of ninja smoke.

Naruto had only been napping for ten minutes when he felt his toe twitch a bit. Instantly forgetting about sleep, Naruto bolted upright, the picture of the perfect student, and started staring at the doorway. Both Sasuke and Sakura noticed his sudden movement, and looked at what was getting his utmost attention. The door opened…

Kakashi was sauntering around town, in no hurry at all, his nose buried in his Icha Icha Paradise book and giggling like a young girl. People walking past looked at him strangely, but overall he was paid no special attention to. He walked into the Academy, nose buried into his book, and nonchalantly strolled down the hallways. Finding the room where his students were, he put his book away, after all, first impressions were very important, and opened the door…

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Immediately the eraser held between the doorway and the doorjamb fell, Kakashi stopped short, and caught the eraser in his hands, it was then that he noticed the string tied to it, and jumped forward as he felt something smack onto his back. Hearing something sizzling and thinking it was an explosive tag, Kakashi immediately dropped the eraser as he frantically reached behind him in trying to pull it off. A reddish powder fell around him, and, closing his watering eye, he started sneezing furiously. As he stepped forward a bit, his foot stopped short of the bright-colored gumballs scattered on the floor, and instead stepped onto an empty space large enough for his foot. That turned out to be a huge mistake, as numerous pencils-unsharpened-were suddenly launched from a desk. Kakashi managed to deflect most of them with a kunai, but a lot of them managed to hit his vest and stick there, thanks to the glue that was generously smeared on each of them. The blocked ones fell onto the floor, and hit the bright-colored balls…which turned out to be smoke bombs.

Lots of explosions ensued, and multi-colored smoke could be seen covering half of the room. Naruto had looked on at his pranks with a huge grin plastered all over his face, while Sakura was just stunned at the thought of the trouble that they would get in. Sasuke wore a slight smirk on his face, which immediately changed into a frown as he thought how he might get out of such a trap. If the decoy tag was replaced with a real one, the pepper with poison, and the pencils with knives…Sasuke frowned, it look like that there wasn't any way to get around it; once someone opened the door, they were stuck in the trap and had to face whatever came. _Could the dead last be smarter than me? No, I was top shinobi. If he was really so smart, he would have passed earlier. _Looking over at the said shinobi, he was startled to see him looking at him. As if he read his mind, he grinned. Sasuke was infuriated at such a grin, _How dare a dead-last shinobi think himself to be on par with me!_ Then he noticed Naruto pointing at the smoke and then pointing up, then he started to crouch under his desk. Looking puzzled, Sasuke looked up, and saw it, quickly, he scramble under his desk as well. Sakura, hearing the sudden commotion on her side of the room, turned and saw Naruto the way he was; under a desk and looking ridiculous as he grinned and was pointing at the still smoky side, then at the ceiling. Turning in the towards Sasuke and about to make a comment about how stupid Naruto was, she fell silent as she saw her love in the same position as Naruto, but scowling. Not wanting him to think that she was better than him, sitting while he was crouching on the floor, she scrambled off the desk, and under it, and just in time.

The smoke from the smoke-bombs had finally reached the sensors on the ceiling, and, Fire country being _fire _country, the exquisite sprinklers came on and was localized to just that room, presumably soaking everybody, and hopefully, smothering out the fire.

Safe under the desks, Naruto grinned at his teammates and gave them the double thumb-ups. Sakura was just stunned at how well planned this was, and Sasuke just scowled back at him, until Naruto stared at him with ice-blue eyes for a moment. Sasuke was stunned, he blinked, but he just saw warm sky-blue eyes staring back. Suitably shaken, Sasuke just focused his attention back on their poor jounin instructor while thinking about that cold, calculating look, and wondering whether he had imagined it or not.

After five very long and very wet minutes, the sprinklers shut off, and Team 7 came out from under the desks while a very wet Kakashi stared right back at them. Some how, his white hair was still the way it was, even after the shower, but his eye was bloodshot red, and some of the pepper was still on him, soaked into his vest so there were red patches here and there. About twenty pencils decorated the front of his vest and the shins of his pants were slightly burned from the explosions, with small holes here and there. He looked over each of the members of Team 7: from the nervous Sakura, to the scowling Sasuke, to the grinning Naruto. Holding his elbow in his hand, Kakashi placed his right hand under his chin, and stated, "I would say that my first impression of you, though very impressed, is that I hate you." And so saying, a bucket that was before balanced on the board, was now over filling with liquid and spilled, right onto Kakashi's hair and completely soaking him in pink dye. At this, the gloomy statement was dissolved with Naruto's maniacal laughter.

Ignoring both that fact that Naruto was literally rolling on the ground laughing and that he was completely clothed in items of various shades of pink, Kakashi started sloshing his way towards the door and said, "We'll meet on the roof."

Team 7 just gawked at him for a second, then each broke into their respective reactions. Sasuke just sulked, and headed for the door, Sakura hit Naruto over the head and yelled at him for making the instructor hate them before running after Sasuke. Naruto just nursed the bump on his head before grinning again and going towards the window.

_So what did you think Kyubbi? _In his head, all Naruto could hear was maniacal laughter bouncing in the corridors of his mind as the great Kyubbi was acting just like Naruto was a few moments ago. Grinning, Naruto opened the window, applied chakra to his feet and started walking up the wall. A few feet from the top, Naruto lied down on the wall and started to climb the rest of the way. Trying to pretend that he was worse than he seemed, he made a lot of noise, rattled around, and eventually asked for Kakashi's help.

Kakashi was slightly surprised that a shinobi as reputed as bad as he was could climb a few floors as fast and as silent as he could, but then have to have help for the last few feet. Shrugging, Kakashi pulled Naruto up onto the roof while the door opened. Both Sasuke and Sakura were slightly surprised that Naruto was already on the roof, well, half on, but just chalked it down as trying to make a flashy entrance.

When everybody was seated, Kakashi said, "So, tell us about your self, name, likes, dislikes, hobbies, dreams for the future, stuff like that."

Sakura said, "Well, why don't you start."

"Alright, my name is Hatake Kakashi. I have no desire to tell you guys about my likes and dislikes. Dreams for the future…? Hmm…Well I have lots of hobbies…"

Whispering, Sakura said, "So all we learned was his name?"

"Alright, who's next?"

True to his mask, Naruto raised his hand into the air and yelled, "Oooh, me! Me! Me!"

Ignoring him, Kakashi pointed at Sasuke, "You, guy in the blue. You can start off."

Sasuke just replied, " Uchiha Sasuke, my likes are training, my dislikes are annoying girls and dobes. My hobbies are training and getting stronger. I don't really want to use the word 'dream', but I do have an ambition, to revive my clan and to kill a certain man."

Kakashi though, _Ah, he hasn't changed after all._

Sakura just smiled shyly at him, _That's so cool!_

Naruto just frowned slightly, _Hm, at his level, maybe not for several decades._

Kakashi then pointed to Sakura, "You, Pinky, you're next."

Frowning slightly at the name Pinky, Sakura replied, "Haruno Sakura. My likes are…" here she glanced in Sasuke's direction and squealed, continuing, "My dislikes are idiots, blondes, and especially Naruto! I don't really have any hobbies though, or any goals…"

Kakashi looked slightly bored, _Hm, seems like the female adolescent mind is concentrated around boys rather than getting stronger…_

Naruto was having extreme difficulty refraining himself from rolling his eyes, _No hobbies? Then what the hell do you count being a Sasuke fan-girl? An occupation?_

Kakashi didn't even have to point to Naruto before he started shouting, "My turn! Uzumaki Naruto! I like cup ramen. What I like even more is the restaurant ramen Iruka-sensei buys me. I don't like the three-minute wait for the cup ramen to cook. My hobbies are pranks and eating lots of ramen…

Kakashi was by now slightly cold and irritated, from the all the water soaked into his clothes, _Is all this kid thinks about ramen? Then what the hell are fruit and vegetables doing in his apartment?_

Naruto was finishing, "My goal is to become the greatest Hokage ever!"

Everybody stared at him for a moment, Sakura yelled, "Hokage? Don't be ridiculous, you're still learning how to throw weapons!", Sasuke snorted, then went back to staring off into space, and Kakashi was just looking at him lazily while his mind was running furiously.

Naruto yelled back at Sakura, "I _will_ become Hokage! And then everybody will respect me!"

Kakashi picked up on the second part of that statement, _Could that be a clue to his actions? _

Sasuke commented, "As if anyone would respect you dobe."

Naruto screamed, "Why you…" and was hit back by Sakura as she yelled, "Don't you dare touch Sasuke-kun!"

Kakashi coughed, getting everybody's attention, "Well that's enough of that. We'll start our duties tomorrow."

Naruto yelled, "Alright, what kind of duties?"

"Well, first we'll do something together, just the four of us."

"What? What?"

"Survival training."

Everybody had a puzzled expression on their face, Sakura said, "Survival training? Why is that our duty? Didn't we already do a lot of training at the Academy?"

"This isn't normal training, and I'll be your opponent tomorrow."

Naruto wore a genuine puzzled expression on his face, "Huh? Then what is it?"

At this, Kakashi looked down and his shoulders started to shake. Sakura asked, "Hey, what's so funny sensei?"

Kakashi looked up, "No, it's just that…when I tell you guys this, you'll definitely flip."

Naruto looked at Kakashi funnily, "Huh? Flip? Why's that?"

"Because of the 27 graduates, only 9 of them will stay on as genin. Everybody else will be sent back to the Academy for more training. It's an extremely hard training exercise with a failure rate of over 66!"

Everybody was silent as they silently contemplated their fate tomorrow. Kakashi just laughed and said, "I told you would flip."

Naruto finally shook off his shock to ask, "Then what was the point of graduating?"

"Oh that? That was just so as to weed out the weaklings, and select those that have a _sensible _chance of becoming genin."

Naruto just screamed, "Whaaaaaat!"

Kakashi ignored him, "Tomorrow, you'll be judged on the training field. Bring all your shinobi tools, and don't eat breakfast, unless you enjoy throwing up." Digging into his pouch, he dug out three sheets, and handed them to everybody, "These transcripts tell you everything you need to know. See you there at six tomorrow." And with that, he left in a poof of ninja smoke.

Naruto just barely glanced at the page, before he turned silent again and looked over at what everybody else was doing. Sakura was frantically studying the page while Sasuke had done as he did and was now in deep thought. Stretching as he got up, Naruto said his goodbyes-which were received with silence and glares. Shrugging it off, Naruto started leaping across the roofs towards the photo shop. Once there, he dropped off his rolls of film, was told to come back in a few hours, and started off to Icharaku's.

"Hey old man! Hi Ayame!"

"Hey Naruto!"

"Hi Naruto."

"So what'll be this time?"

The Kyubbi started rumbling in his head, **Kit…**

I know, I know… 

"Um, how bout I start with some of those new veggie ramen you have?"

The ramen vendor was no longer surprised at Naruto's choice, he just shrugged and turned back to the stove.

Fifteen bowls later…

Both the old man and Ayame were still amazed at the amount of ramen the Naruto could pack away. Staring at him, he practically inhaled ramen.

Finishing his bowl, Naruto wiped his mouth, "Thanks old man!" Pulling out his frog purse, he counted, "Here's 30…40…45 ryou!"

Smiling, the ramen vendor took the money then put back three ryou, "Here first was on the house." Suddenly he was gasping for breath as Naruto hugged him tightly and yelled, "Thanks old man!" and ran off down the street.

Running back to the photo shop, he asked if his pictures were done. The clerk politely told him that they would not be done for several hours, and that he should come back at six o' clock to pick them up. Naruto frowned and ran off towards the forest.

Finding his personal training ground in the forest, he started yelling at the Kyubbi. Hey Kyubbi! Training time! 

**mmm…wake me up in an hour…**

_NOW!_

Springing upright in his cell, the Kyubbi growled **Alright kit, since you asked for it, gimmie two hundred push-ups, then the same for sit-ups, and do it on the water!**

Aw man…   
Make that three hundred! 

_Crap… _Naruto ran over the pond until he was in the middle, then started doing push-ups and sit-ups right in the middle. When he was done, **Now give me fifty laps around Konoha! At top speed! And on the walls! I'll know if you're slacking off. And if you do so, **here the Kyubbi grinned nastily, **I'll double it!**

Gulping, Naruto ran up Konoha's outer wall, and started to run as fast as he could. By the time he was done, he was staggering and was barely hanging onto the wall with his chakra. Finishing in a collapse/slide down the wall, Naruto looked at his watch, and found that it was only three. Digging into his pouch for a soldier pill, Naruto dropped it into his mouth and jumped up; instantly refreshed. Going deeper into the forest, Naruto found his 'jutsu arena' as he called it. It was a large flat clearing, and almost entirely devoid of plant life. There was a river running close by, and Naruto had dug a pond in the middle.

Walking over to the pond, Naruto started to perform his warm-up ritual: several doton spike jutsus crisscrossing the entire area, then a variety of basic suiton, ration, fuuton, and katon jutsus, obliterating the spikes completely.

When he was done, he was slightly winded, and his 'arena' looked more like a ninjutsu battlefield. Turning back to the pond, Naruto started to ask the Kyubbi for his performance. _So, how did I do?_

**Pathetic, though not as bad as usual. **Naruto grinned, from the Kyubbi, this was his way of saying good job.

Now get back to working on those bunshins. I want one hundred mizu bunshins, then another hundred kage bunshins, and then I want you to tell each and every one of them to hunt you! And then you hunt them! 

_Aw c'mon, that's too easy. I can do that in half an hour, max._

Wearing a feral grin, **Too easy eh? Fine, I'll teach you a new jutsu right now. Kirigakure no jutsu.**

Yeah! 

**Go over to that pond and do these seals. **Naruto did as he was told and quickly memorized and performed the jutsu. At the end, he yelled, "Kirigakure no jutsu!" The entire area was quickly covered in a fog. Naruto looked down and tried to see his hand, and failed. **This jutsu covers an area in a thick fog so no visibility is possible. Now try to find your bunshins. I'll even set a time limit, two hours. Hahaha.**

_Sadistic fox._

Thank you for the complement. 

Grumbling to himself, Naruto tied his headband around his eyes, then started listening for the slightest movement. The Kyubbi had fallen eerily silent, so Naruto felt completely alone. The Kyubbi was actually very interested in Naruto's progress, as he had a doujutsu he believed was passed onto Naruto, but so far, it hadn't shown any sign of being there. **_Perfect, I won't even have to tell him how do use it._**

Naruto was tiring. It had been over an hour, and he had only found twenty of his army of two hundred. Hearing a slight whistling sound, Naruto ducked, but he felt the shruiken slice off some hair. Cursing, Naruto ran towards where the projectiles had come from and felt a bunshin come into contact with his fist before it melted around his arm. _Mizu bunshin, number twenty-one._ _Shit. _Sitting against a tree, reflex had Naruto looking at his arm to see the time. _Five twenty-one, only another forty minutes to go. Wait a minute…_Doing a double take, Naruto looked back at his watch, and found that he could see it. Looking down, he saw himself. _Damn…I can see even through my headband and the mist. Is this some kind of bloodline I never knew you had?_

**Damn right it is kit. More specifically, it's mine. **Sitting up in surprise, Naruto took off his headband and looked around the area with new eyes.

_What the hell is it?_ Locating a group of bunshins, Naruto sped off towards them.

**What it looks like, a demon bloodline limit doujutsu. Doesn't look very advanced though…oh well, it's a start. **Naruto grew more excited as his vision expanded slightly with every second, and leaped in the middle of the group, surprising his bunshins.

_You mean it can get better than this?_ Naruto performed seals and called out, "Suiton: Daibakufu no Jutsu!" A large cyclone of water appeared around Naruto and ripped apart the entire group.

**Damn straight it can get better. **Naruto started see the location of each and every bunshin he created in the entire clearing, hurling shruiken and kunai, he called out, "Shruiken Kunai Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" and managed to wipe out half of them.

_So what else can it do? _Looking down at his watch, Naruto was shocked to see that he had twenty minutes left to kill about a hundred bunshins. Naruto started to rush after the nearest bunshin, taking him out, then followed up towards the next one.

**There are a total of nine separate abilities. **Three down. **The first one would be what you have now, enhanced vision. Two hundred and seventy degree vision the ability to focus your vision, and the ability to see through objects. **This was true, Naruto could see a lot more than usual, and even through some trees. Thirteen down. **The second would be chakra vision. It's not as accurate as doujutsus like the Byukugan, but when fully mastered, you can see the chakra field all creatures emit, whether their trying to mask it or not. **Twenty-one down. With these words, Naruto recognized the light blue aura that was wrapped around his bunshins. Twenty-two. Naruto picked up the pace once he recognized the blue glows as his bunshins. **Third, you will be able to copy all types of ninjutsu and genjutsu, as long as your opponent does the seals and you see them. Kind of like the Sharingan, except you wont be able to foresee like they can. You can, however, copy certain bloodline limits if the opponent is close enough, though your power is slightly weaker than that of the original. **Thirty-four. **Fourth, you will be able to store jutsus in your eyes, which would mean…**

Naruto actually stopped in surprise at these words and interrupted, _What do you mean I can store jutsus in my eye?_

**Exactly what it sounds like. You can perform jutsus and instead of them appearing as they should, the chakra signature is stored in the eye so you can release them by focusing chakra to your eye without having to perform any hand seals. It's extremely useful for getting the jump on someone. **

****_Cool! Fifty down…thirteen minutes left…_

**Yeah. Fifth, you can control ambient chakra- that's the chakra that's naturally occurring in the world- and shape it as you will.**

_Huh?_

**Alright, in simple terms, you will be able to make weapons and stuff like that out of anything, wood, stone, water, air, you name it, you can make stuff outta it. You can also force it to be weak or strong. How else do you think destroyed mountains and with one flick of my tail? Not even I have that much muscle. **

_Seventy-three…So you're saying that I could have infinite kunai?_

**Something like that, yes.**

_Yeah! Top that Sasuke-bastard! _

The Kyubbi winced at the decibel of Naruto's yelling, **The sixth is local element control, it's kind of like the ambient chakra control ability, but taken to a whole new level. You use a lot more chakra than the last one, and then only to one specific element at a time, but then you're pretty much lord of that element for about a hundred meters all around. The circle of control gets wider as you add more chakra, nice for weather control.**

_Alright! Oh, I'm done. Better pick up the pictures then. And what about the seventh, eighth, and ninth abilities?_

**For the seventh, eighth, and ninth, I'll just tell you the names and basic effect. If you ever get up to them in your lifetime, I'll share the rest of the info with you then. Till then; Fox fire. Summons blue fire. Transformation. Turns you into your 'inner' creature. And Demon change. Basically transformation-mark two.**

Naruto listened to the fox silently as he bounded through the forest, with a large grin on his face that was steadily getting larger. _I have got to use that some day. How do I do it?_

**You can't. **Naruto's grin disappeared

_What! But you said…_

**No, its not like you can never do them, but you have to work your way up the ranks. Most demons have multi-leveled doujutsus, unique to each clan, and everybody, and I mean _everybody, _has to work their way up one by one. **

Naruto sulked.

**That's life kit. Now do you want the good news or the bad news first?**

_About what?_

**My 'gift'.**

_The bad. _

**Alright, this doujutsu will suck up a lot more chakra than human ones, and your chakra system will have long, excruciating jumps of change to accommodate the new way my chakra flows for every ability after the third. Also, your chakra system will also be unstable until you reach mastery of each level. **Naruto's shoulders sagged at the thought of an unstable chakra system.

**Now here's the good news. With me in you, you produce only slightly less chakra than you will use with my doujutsu, so the drain is pretty much about half of human doujutsu standards. Also, as it is now, you can use the first two and probably the third as well, though you still have some ways to go until you master them. Finally, with your Uzumaki blood, the changes will take maybe half as long as usual, and the unstableness will be reduced to just extra chakra wasted with each jutsu you do, though that might be able to be reduced if you practice enough chakra control. **

_That's ok then. Hey I see Konoha! _Naruto started sprint forwards towards the huge wall.

**You might want to turn your eyes off kit.**

_How the hell do I do that?_

**Just don't push as much chakra to your eyes. Try this, stop the chakra flow to your eyes, then let the normal amount flow through. To turn it on again, just push more chakra there. **

_Cool. _Naruto practiced turning his eyes on and off again for a while. He sprinted through the gates and jumped across the rooftops towards the picture place. Then something occurred to him.

_Hey, what do you mean my Uzumaki blood?_

**Oh, your father told me about it, something about a quirk in your chakra systems. Your chakra channels are larger than usual, so you can do higher-level ninjutsu easier than low-level ones. Nice, eh?**

_Yeah. How come we can't do lower level ones though?_

**You aren't incapable of not doing them, you just can't do them as easily. Control problems. Normal shinobis can do techniques like bunshin with some practice since they require about the normal amount of chakra, but the Uzumaki have larger channels, so for them to use the techniques, you need finer chakra control.**

…_Ok, I got about half of what you just said. In regular language please?_

Sighing, **Alright, lets say that chakra is ink and that a low-level jutsu is a small kanji and a high-level one is a large one. Following me so far?**

_Yeah._

**Now regular shinobis would be using normal brushes, while a Uzumaki is stuck with brush bigger than him. For a low-level jutsu, that small brush is easy to control and after few tries, the regular shinobi has completely mastered it. With a huge brush though, it's harder to get the precise control one needs for a small character. Get it?**

_Yeah._

**However, if they are asked to do a high-level technique, say karyuu endan, then that big brush is perfect for the job, whereas your normal shinobi has to struggle with small brush to paint such a larger character. In essence, a Uzumaki has to work backwards, from high-level techniques to low-level ones, because they simply do not have the chakra control for low-level ones at a young age. GET IT?**

_Um, yeah. Thanks Kyubbi._ Naruto jumped down from the roof and rushed into the store. He rushed outside after five minutes, but this time holding a bag in both hands. Rushing off to his apartment, Naruto was too excited to have noticed the silver-haired jounin following him.

Once inside, Naruto shucked off his jacket, paused, picked it up and hung it in his closet, then placed water on the boil, and practically ripped open his pictures with an eagerness rivaling a child's at Christmas. Opening the first packet with trembling hands, he took out the first picture…and saw that it was clear.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Kakashi was barely five blocks away from Naruto's apartment when he heard a wild yell of joy. Shaking his head, he went back to reading his Icha Icha Paradise book.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto cheered for several minutes before he stopped, to turn off the kettle and cook his cup ramen. Then he opened the rest of the packets, making sure to keep each in it's correct order, and his grin grew wider. Almost every single picture Naruto had taken was clear, and he could finally reproduce the Forbidden scrolls! He was then hit with the problem of figuring out how place the pictures into the scroll forms. He mulled it over while he ate his dinner of twenty different cup ramen, and hit upon the perfect solution. After cleaning up, he made many Kage Bunshins, and ordered them to start working on his project. Most of them were taping the pictures together. He even had some cut up his scrolls with the pictures on, and tape those together. Finally, he himself, transcribed what he could see of the scroll onto many small ones. It took only an hour for the taping to be done, and Naruto dismissed most of his bunshins. Those were ordered to copy what he had already wrote down on previous scrolls. The transcribing took up several hours, and it was almost midnight before he finished. Yawning, he dismissed all but one bunshin and had it clean up after him while he himself brushed his teeth. When he left, his bunshin had already finished and was making his bed. Naruto nodded thanks, and dismissed the bunshin. His last thought before sleep overtook him was that he had never got to see what his doujutsu looked like.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

A:N: Sorry you didn't get to find out what it looked like (evil grin) I'm evil aren't I? Still need a Japanese/American translator site.


	8. Be Late, Fight Well

A/N: Thank you for the translation websites. Now I think that my translations might be a bit off, so for those lucky bilingual people who know Japanese, please correct me and I'll change it. Thanks! 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Earlier that day…

Sakura was trembling as she studied the sheet in front of her as if there was going to be a test on it. _I have to pass, so I can stay with my Sasuke-kun! _Finishing her sheet, she looked up and saw that Sasuke was gone. _Probably gone to train, I should go to. _Standing up, she started to leap across the roofs towards her house. She then pulled out extra sets of kunai and shruiken and jumped off to find an empty spot at the throwing range.

She found one, unfortunately it was next to the one person she really didn't want to see at the moment; Ino-pig. Weighing possible retribution to possible loss of Sasuke, she found there was no choice and just boldly walked out next to Ino.

Ino looked up from her throwing as she heard a clink from the empty space next to her, and saw Sakura. "Hey! Forehead girl! Come to lose to me?"

Retorting as she drew kunai and threw, "Hah! In your dreams Ino-pig!"

Frowning as she saw her rival was closer than she was, "Well there's only one thing that matters, Sasuke-kun, and I refuse to loose him to a wide-headed girl like you."

After several hours of bantering as they threw kunai at the target, they had reached a tie, and a slightly unstable truce that neither of them was going to fight with the other at the moment.

Walking over to the target and pulling out her weapons, Sakura asked, "So, anything new happen?"

Wrinkling her brow, Ino replied, "Now that you mention it, I heard that one of our Academy teachers, Mizuki, you know him, he was one of our exam judges. Anyway, I heard that he's in jail right now, for trying to steal a scroll from the Hokage's scroll library. Oh, and the funny thing is, none of the jounins or chuunins have admitted that they caught him. The closest thing to an admission is that he was carried in all beaten up by our other teacher, Iruka-sensei, but he said that he didn't beat him, but that a student of his had. The Hokage himself vouched for it, but nobody would say who the student was…"

Staring at Ino like she was daft, "Well of course its Sasuke-kun! No other genin is strong enough to beat Mizuki! He was a chuunin!"

Ino just shot right back, "Who are you calling Sasuke-kun? He's mine!"

The bickering continued well into the afternoon until both left the range at the same time, neither wanting to seem to the other that she was slacking off.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto woke up to the ringing of his alarm clock. Reaching his hand up and grabbing it, he pulled it in front of his blurry vision. As his vision cleared, he noticed several things, the sun was shining through his window, the birds were chirping, and the time was 6:30.

Naruto's eyes grew wide; he jumped out of bed and quickly assessed the situation. He was in his bedclothes, last nights mess was still here, and he never got together his shinobi tools! Thinking quickly, Naruto struggled to find an answer to his problem, he found one.

"KAGE BUNSHIN NO JUTSU!" Naruto created a bunch of clones. They immediately started to clean up, make breakfast, and put his shinobi tools together. Satisfied, Naruto ran into his bathroom.

He showered.

He brushed his teeth.

He dressed up.

He grabbed his tools and the still cooking ramen cup and raced out the door.

Reaching into his pouch, Naruto ran his eyes over it until he found the exam site. Area 22. Naruto groaned and skidded to a stop. Area 22 was a training ground on the other side of Konoha! Turning around, Naruto ran as fast as he could.

As he ran towards his house, he had an idea. _Hm, maybe I should take a few of the forbidden scrolls. _Creating one Kage Bunshin, Naruto sent it off to his house while he continued on his way, praying that he wouldn't be disqualified.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

15 minutes later…

"YOU"RE LATE!" Naruto winced; Sakura's voice had reached a deafening volume, especially when shouted right into his face. In the background, Sasuke smirked.

Rubbing his ears, Naruto replied, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I slept in. Is Kakashi-sensei here? Did you guys do the test already? Did you pass? Did I fail? How was it?"

Growing angry, Sakura punched him, and was slightly shocked when Naruto flew back into the ground a few feet away. Shoving that aside for later, she seethed, "No, you're lucky. Kakashi-sensei isn't here yet. Why don't you try to be more like Sasuke? I'll bet here was here an hour before the specified time."

Sighing in relief, Naruto let the 'be more like Sasuke' jab slide for the time being. He picked himself up, and ignoring Sakura, moved away from the pair and sat against a tree. Sakura just stared at Naruto for a moment, then she went back to fawning over Sasuke.

Sighing, Naruto stared sadly at what happened to his ramen. It was completely ruined, both from his excessively fast run, and from his kissing the ground. Ah well, burning the cup with a small fire jutsu, Naruto rummaged in his pouch until he found what he was looking for, the scroll of poisons he never finished yesterday. Pulling it out to where he was last, Naruto started reading.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Sasuke looked over to where Naruto was…and blinked. _Was that a fire jutsu I just saw? Naw, couldn't be. They all require seals and I didn't see him perform any._ Sasuke rubbed his eyes, _must have been a trick of the light, and I am very tired._ Stifling a yawn, he went back to just standing, staring, and ignoring Sakura.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto had just finished his scroll when he heard a small "psst" looking at the bushes; he saw two sky-blue eyes and blond hair staring back at him. Grinning, Naruto set aside his scroll, and reached nonchalantly with one hand towards the bush. A bowl was pushed into his hands. Naruto looked back and saw the signature mark of the Ichiraku stand stamped on the side, and the signature wisp of steam from a cooking bowl of ramen. Crying his gratefulness, Naruto grabbed the steaming bowl with both hands and inhaled Ichiraku's heavenly delight that was ramen. About to rip off the top, he paused and looked over at his kage bunshin, he mouthed, 'how long?' His kage bunshin grinned and held up two fingers. Sadly, Naruto set his bowl of ramen off to the side, then pause and set it to his other side, on Sasuke's blind side. He couldn't be too careful after all, Sakura wouldn't notice anything but Sasuke, but Sasuke was sharp, despite his arrogance and inferiority complex. Sighing, Naruto held his hand out again, and received a bundle of scrolls. Thanking his bunshin, Naruto dismissed it, and yanked off the string holding it together. Surprisingly enough, it wasn't just one of the copies of the forbidden scroll, it also had a scroll of suiton jutsus, and one of his previous scrolls of weapon summonings. He had never gotten around to actually opening it and releasing the weapons. Opening his weapons scroll first, he noticed that it contained mostly shruiken, as well as a few of those steel kunai that he had never used. Grinning, Naruto rolled it back up, then tucked it snugly inside his jacket.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

The weapons scroll reminded him of his own weapon status. Opening his bag, he found that there were large packs of kunai a whole pouch of shruiken, and assorted shinobi items such as soldier pills and, his own invention, compressed chakra pills. Naruto grinned as he pulled out a small, light blue pouch, remembering how he had came up for the idea for it.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

…Flashback…

**Stand up kit! I still want another five rounds of jutsus!**

_What! Then I need more chakra, give me some._

**No can do kit, you're body has reached my daily chakra limit.**

_Well since I can't do it, I'm going home._

**Like hell you are! You're staying here until you've done those jutsus!**

Grumbling, Naruto reached into his pocket and pulled out his pouch of soldier pills, upending them over his palm, he was extremely surprised when only three fell out. Staring at them, Naruto raged, _What the hell Kyubbi! This pouch was filled to the brim just two days ago! And soldier pills aren't cheap! These jutsu rounds you're making me do are really eating into my wallet!_

**Not my problem, you want a better soldier pill, fine, go ahead and make one. **The kyubbi hesitated, then grinned, **In fact, let's make a bet. If you can make a better pill by the end of the week, I'll let you off for today, _and _I'll teach you a new jutsu. If you can't…you have to do this exercise a thousand times over. Deal?**

Naruto swallowed, but with blind determination, _Deal!_

So saying, he returned home, and started researching the ingredients in soldier pills before he fell asleep. Over the next three days, he tried various combinations of possible advanced soldier pills, and tested them on himself…with various results. He remembered one particularly memorable combination of powders that turned his skin dark red, and made him hyperactive, even for him, for several hours. Eventually, he had to go stand under a cold shower to make him feel just close to normal.After solving the control problem on that combination, he made a fairly improved pill, though when he infused his chakra into the ingredients, he created a fairly spectacular effect.

…End Flashback…

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto opened the pouch and looked over his slightly large blue pills. Closing it, Naruto pulled out another, even smaller red pouch with a skull on it, frowning as he saw it, he opened it slightly and took out a very small, red pill. And remembered how it came by.

After showing the Kyubbi, the demon fox had become slightly interested, and he had created another batch, this time with Kyubbi chakra and six times the kick. He had tried the first one that he made, and had passed out afterwards. After waking up, he found that he was supercharged with energy, and had immediately raced down to the forest to try out his new power. Doing the Kyubbi's exercise, he had managed it five hundred times easy, and a thousand with a little difficulty. After managing to stagger home though, he was bedridden for three days, as his body tried to fix itself after such a large burst of chakra. When he was back to full health, he recreated the pill, as he figured he might need it some day, but reduced the size so that each was only three times the strength.

Shaking his head at painful memories, Naruto noticed a box on the bottom of his pack. Looking at it, it seemed to be just a plain box, until he pulled it out and noticed the chopsticks taped to the top. Seemed like his kage bunshins decided to pack him a little snack. And speaking of food…

Naruto reached over and pulled his bowl onto his lap. Pulling open the paper cover, he watched with rapt eyes as a bowl of golden, beef ramen appeared before him. Eating slowly, he savored the taste of heaven, and when he was done, he was sorely pressed not to get up and get another bowl. Remembering what Kakashi-sensei said the other day though helped him stay on the training ground. _Don't eat breakfast unless yo enjoy throwing up. _Naruto was sure that a stomach full of fifteen ramen bowls would definitely make him throw up, but afterwards…Naruto's mouth watered at the thought of all the ramen he would eat.

He shoved that thought away for now though. Pulling open the forbidden scroll, he found that it contained technique. Somewhat confused, Naruto looked at the title he wrote, Setsugou Youso no jutsu (Art of the Union of the Elements). Quickly scanning the scroll, Naruto then pulled open the Suiton jutsu scroll, and checked something at the very end. Grinning, Naruto began to learn the Setsugou Youso no jutsu and the Suiton: Suiryuudan no jutsu.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

9:00 AM

"Yo"

"YOU"RE LATE!" Kakashi suppressed a quick grin, not that it could be seen from behind his mask, Naruto and Sakura had both yelled in unison, agreeing with each other for the first time. Looking at Sasuke, he saw that he was just as annoyed, but he just restrained himself to a frown.

Kakashi pulled out an alarm clock and two lunch boxes and set them on the middle stump. Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke just looked at them with puzzled expressions on their faces. This time Kakashi really did grin. He pulled out a pair of bells and dangled them in front of the confused faces. "Ok, you have until noon to take these bells from me. Whoever doesn't get a bell fails and…"

At this point, Sakura interrupted, "Um, Kakashi-sensei, there are only two bells."

Kakashi stared at her, "I know there are two bells, only two of you will pass this test."

At this, Kakashi grinned behind his mask as he saw the conflicting expressions on his student's faces.

Sasuke was frozen, _I have to get a bell, or else I'll never be strong enough to beat _him.

Sakura's face held fear, _If I don't get a bell; I won't be able to stay with my Sasuke-kun! I have to get one if I want any chance of capturing his heart._

Naruto's was strange though, since it held fear with a trace of uncertainty, _I really want to pass, so I have to get a bell. But something's not right here…_

Feeling that he had let them stew in their own emotions for long enough, " Where was I…oh yes. Whoever doesn't get a bell fails, and will be tied to the stump. Then, I will eat lunch in front of you." Sasuke and Sakura groaned as their stomachs rumbled. They simultaneously thought, _So that's why he told us not to eat breakfast. _Naruto just grinned, and thanked whatever was up there for getting his kage bunshins to bring food. Kakashi looked at him for a second, then moved on, "You only need one bell to pass, and eat lunch." Tying the bells to his belt loop, "Let's start!"

There were a couple of blurs and dust clouds as Team 7 went into hiding. Kakashi peered around and thought, _They're good, I can just barely see a trace of the first two and the last one has disappeared altogether._

"C'mon, fight me!"

Sweat dropping, Kakashi stared at the blond as the dust settled, _or not._

Sakura sweat dropped as she saw the blond just standing there, not bothering to make any move at concealing himself. _What is he thinking? Idiot._

Naruto's mind worked furiously as he stood defiantly in front of his teacher. _What is it? What is it? I know something's missing here but what is it? _Out loud, he yelled, "So are you going to fight me or not?" Kakashi stood motionless. "Then I'll start things off!" Yelling, Naruto charged Kakashi, then skidded to a halt as he put a hand in his pouch.

Speaking almost as to the air, "Lesson One: Taijutsu."

Naruto looked genuinely confused, "Huh?" _If he's going to teach me about the arts of the body, the why is he reaching for a weapon?_

Kakashi's hand started to slowly withdraw, Naruto tensed as he waited for what would come out…and face faulted as his sensei drew out an Icha Icha Paradise book. "What the hell is that for?"

"I really want to find out how it ends."

"Fine, don't expect me to go easy on you!" Naruto charged and attacked.

"Against you, it won't make a difference." Kakashi started reading and giggling as he avoided and blocked all of Naruto's attacks. Finally, Naruto decide to give Kakashi some bait, and he overextended his next punch. Like he expected, Kakashi took the bait, and took his back.

"A ninja should always be aware of his back," he said, as he performed the seal of the tiger.

Sakura's eyes widened, _He…he wouldn't use that move on a genin would he?_

"Eh?"

Sakura stood up and yelled, "Naruto! Move! You're going to die!"

Kakashi yelled, "Konoha's Ultimate Secret Taijutsu Move! 1000 Years of Pain!" and shoved his clasped hands straight up towards Naruto's ass. There was a moment of silence, then Naruto's face changed to a grimace, and he flew up and landed in the river. Kakashi stood up and started to read again, completely ignoring Sakura as she tried to find a new place to hide.

Naruto was sinking to the river bottom, "Damn, the boss isn't going to like this. Oh well." Letting loose with two shruiken, he made a quick seal and created another seven of himself. Looking around, _Damn, well I hope eight are enough for the boss's plan. _And with that, he started to swim towards the surface.

Kakashi had just gotten rid of the two shruiken he had caught, and was about to turn around when he heard a gasp. Looking back, he saw a Naruto lying on the riverbank, coughing up water, "Had enough yet?"

"Of _cough_ course n-not! _cough cough_"

"Well do better next time."

"Damn it! I can fight better! If only I weren't so hungry!" Hearing this, both Sasuke and Sakura reflected back on when was the last time they ate, both of their stomachs grumbled.

Kakashi had continued the banter, "Well tough luck, a shinobi should learn to deal with pain." And so saying, he turned around and started to read his book again.

Naruto waited, _A little closer, a littler more…perfect! _Roaring as he stood up with surprising vitality, "I'll show you pain!" He pulled out a kunai as seven more Naruto's jumped out of the water and started charging together.

Sasuke was surprised, looking closer, _I count 1,2, 3…8 real bodies. Not illusion but actual flesh and blood bodies. This guy could be trouble._

Sakura was stunned at the enormity of the jutsu she just saw. _How…how can you do that? A genin shouldn't be able to perform what is definitely a high-level jutsu!_

Kakashi was slightly surprised, but only at the fact that he had decided to pull this out now. From what he had heard, Naruto had used this jutsu to beat Mizuki. He strode up a few steps, and waited for the clones to come.

Naruto grinned; _The boss's plan is working! Great! _"Attack!" All the clones suddenly threw all their easily accessible kunai and shruiken, and followed up with a taijutsu charge.

Kakashi deflected some of the weaponry; most of it was poorly aimed and passed him harmlessly. Then he just stood still, waiting for the clones.

Naruto's grin grew wider, _The boss is in position! Time for phase 3…_

Kakashi was about to deflect and counter the first two clones' attacks, when they suddenly just exploded in their face in poofs of ninja smoke. Kakashi was surprised that Naruto would willingly give up some of his forces. Then he felt something land on his back, and turned his head to see bright blond hair, triumphant sky-blue eyes, and a large grin, and was unable to keep the shock out of his one visible eye.

Naruto snarled, "Nice to see your back sensei, but shouldn't a shinobi always be on the look out for what's behind? Hm?"

Sakura was surprised by what she saw. _He henged himself into a rock while exchanging his position with one of those solid bunshins. Then he waited until his other bunshins were charging Kakashi-sensei and snuck up behind him. He's a lot better than I thought…_then she shook her head, _What am I thinking? Sasuke-kun is the one for me, not that Naruto-baka!_

Kakashi calmed down; after that first shock, his heart rate had accelerated incredibly fast. And started waiting for the next stage to come.

Naruto spoke from his hanging position, "I don't want to pass yet Kakashi-sensei. I just want one good hit!"

One of his kage bunshins yelled as he leapt into the air, arm cocked back into a fist, "THIS IS FOR MY ASS!"

The Kage Bunshin connected with Kakashi's face, and was extremely surprised as Kakashi's face disappeared and a Naruto bunshin was seen instead. Smiling quietly to himself for his thinking ahead, Naruto made all the remaining bunshins jump back into a circle then created a half tiger seal, and yelled to the entire forest, "Hey sensei! I left some presents for you!" He then focused chakra and said one word to himself, "Boom."

A huge explosion as well as a yelling Kakashi shook the air, as said person was launched back into the clearing. Naruto smirked and chuckled, "Explosive note to the back, gotta hurt. The shock one to the ass was just revenge though"

Sakura's eye twitched slightly, _Why the hell would he shock Kakashi's ass? And how the hell did he get them on in the first place…_

Sasuke grunted, impressed against his will _Not bad for a dobe. Three layer attack. He charged with a bunch of bunshins, used those as a distraction so he could latch onto sensei's back, and used the sudden shift of weight as a distraction to place two tags unnoticed. Where did he get that electric one though…_

Kakashi stood up, if slightly wobbly, and dusted himself off, and stared at Naruto with a bored eye, though it now contained a little respect, "I admit, I underestimated you. I didn't expect you to place tags on my back and," here Kakashi grimaced, "my ass. Where did you get that one anyway? Custom made?"

Grinning, Naruto said, "Nope, handmade. Figured it out after using up like a thousand faulty notes. Took me ages to get the characters right."

Standing slightly more steadily, Kakashi got into a Taijutsu position, "Well, are you going to attack or not?"

Surprising everybody, Naruto just sat down and lied on his side, "Nah, I need time to think up of more ideas, and I'll let you recover from my revenge. But I want a clean fight next time, no tricks like that ass poke thing!"

Sasuke almost dropped out of his tree, _What the hell is that dobe thinking? This proves it; he's an idiot. A real shinobi would have followed that up with a nonstop series of jutsus. _Grumbling to himself, he started to grab shruiken and hold them ready in both hands, _well, at least I can benefit from all this._

Relaxing, Kakashi smiled said, "Fine, I'll fight you again, no tricks, no underhanded moves, just a clean fight. Give me an hour to let your teammates try.

Sasuke saw his opening, _NOW! _He threw six projectiles towards an unsuspecting Kakashi, and they all hit dead on.

Naruto smiled as he saw a bloody, smiling figure fall…then turn into an impaled log. Kakashi had looked on from the trees, _There…_

Sasuke had first been surprised, then angry and panicking. Angry at himself for not noticing the potential trap, panic at the thought that Kakashi would be able to find him now. He jumped back as fast as he could, trying to get as far away as possible from the Jounin.

In the clearing, Naruto yawned, and looked around, trying to find something to keep his mind off sleep. He swept his eyes around, then saw some slight motion on the ground. Activating his…he never actually found out what they were called.

_Hey Kyubbi, what's this doujutsu of yours called?_

**Kitsune Shiryoku. **(Fox Vision)

_Cool! Kitsune Shiryoku!_

Naruto focused chakra into his eyes and immediately his vision expanded until he could see the individual creatures responsible for the movement, ants. Naruto stared with his new, improved eyes, and saw that there was an ant struggling to lift large leaf, another ant came to help, and another and another, until there was a whole bunch of ants, all working together to do what one couldn't. Naruto blinked, and his eyes shut off. And then realization came down on him like a ton of bricks. Naruto thought back quickly to all genin teams that he had seen, _three genin, and one jounin_. He thought back to the explanation of the test, _three genin, two bells, one fails. But that couldn't be right…If there are only ever teams of three, then there always have to be total number of genin of multiples of three. So you can't just have extra genin, it's all or nothing, which means that either the entire team passes or fails, no in between. Something is needed…_Naruto thought back to every memory he had of genin teams, _hm, maybe when we were assigned the teams? Iruka said, "We tried to make the teams as equal as possible"…as equal as possible. So that means that all the teams are essentially starting out on an even footing, so what do they need? _Looking back at the ants, _Teamwork! If everything else is roughly the same, then teamwork is the deciding factor! _Naruto was elated at having figured out his sensei's test. Then he groaned, _Crap! If we have to work together to pass, then we might as well all fail right now. I'm the only one so far that knows about the deciding factor, so I'll be willing to work with anybody to pass. Sakura will only work with that Sasuke-bastard though, and Sasuke-bastard himself will try to get the bells himself. Crap! _Naruto moaned, _…we're screwed._

Sighing, _Ah well, you never know until you try, _then he stood up and stretched. He sauntered into the forest, and said to an apparently inconspicuous tree, "Long pink hair is a liability when trying to hide."

Sakura jumped down, her face burning with slight shame as she tried to keep her long hair out of her face. "Have you seen Sasuke-kun?"

Naruto was startled, but he just pointed and said, "Uh yeah, I think he went…that way…" He trailed off as Sakura took off in the direction he pointed. _Damn! Shouldn't have mentioned Sasuke. Stupid crazy fan-girl…_Grumbling, Naruto ran after Sasuke himself.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Sakura ran into a clearing. She heard a rustle of leaves, and paused. Turning, she saw her Kakashi, whom disappeared in a swirl of leaves.

Kakashi crouched in a nearby tree, hands held in a seal, and peered intently at his young student.

Sakura blinked. There was nobody there.

"Sa…ku…ra." She turned, heart leaping to her throat, then froze at what she saw. Sasuke had just come out from behind a bush, there were various shruiken and kunai sticking out of his body. His left arm was missing, and his left leg was dislocated at the knee. Fingers were missing from both his hands. His left eye was bleeding, and frayed optic nerves could be seen straggling from between his eyelids. His once beautiful face was now crisscrossed with cut marks. All in all, she saw a nightmare.

"Help…me…"

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto heard a scream, but dismissed it as he closed on where Sasuke was.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"Lesson Two: Genjutsu," Kakashi murmured to himself as he surveyed his handiwork; Sakura was out cold on the ground, eyes wide open in fright, and froth coming out of her mouth. "Looks like I might have gone a little too far…" Kakashi shrugged, then walked away to find his third student.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Sasuke stared at a clearing. He was standing out in the open. "Dobe! I know you're there!"

Naruto stood somewhat sheepishly, "Heh heh, was I that easy to find?"

"Uh…yeah." Naruto suddenly had an urge to punch the boy several hundred times, but refrained, if only for the fact that doing so would seriously hamper any plans for teamwork.

"Look, Sasuke. We need to work in a team to pass this test…" Naruto stopped at the sudden frown on Sasuke's face.

"Why should I work with you? I'm much stronger, I'll get the bells myself."

Naruto's temper flared, "Hey, I managed to get him, remember?"

Sasuke snorted, "Luck. You managed to catch him off guard, that's all."

The two stared at each other for a while, then Naruto turned, and walked away. Sasuke just stood in the same position, then heard a large _CRACK, _and winced slightly at the thought of Naruto's fist.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

_Damn you Sasuke-bastard! _Naruto's bloody fist was in the middle of a huge depression he had made. _Kami-sama, how the hell are we going to pass now? _Naruto slumped against the tree at the though of having to do _another _year at the Academy. Sighing, he pulled his fist free, now fully healed, thanks to the Kyubbi, and walked off.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Sasuke contemplated the openings in Naruto's attacks, and the ease in how Sakura had been defeated. _Naruto was stupid; you don't have any honor in Shinobi fights. Sakura is stupid as well, to fall for such an obvious genjutsu, but…_ "I'm not like them."

Kakashi pushed himself off the tree, "Prove it when you get the bells."

Sasuke whirled around and sent off several shruiken, Kakashi dived to the side and yelled, "You'll have to better than that!"

Sasuke just smirked, and instinct told Kakashi to jump upwards, which was a very good move in order to avoid the sudden barrage of knives. Sasuke, however, also leapt upwards, and began to trade blows in midair with his sensei. His punches were caught, his kicks blocked, but he did manage to get close enough to touch a bell once.

Kakashi threw him off to the side and started to sweat some. _He's better than I thought; I haven't been able to read Icha Icha Paradise in this entire match. _Sasuke whirled in midair, and managed to land on his feet. Staring up at his sensei, he began seals for a jutsu.

Kakashi's eye widened, _He shouldn't be able to use that jutsu yet! _

"Katon: Housenka no jutsu!" Sasuke puffed up his chest, then blew out four fireballs from between his fingers. Quickly performing a few seals, "Kaze no Yaiba!" Kakashi created several blades of wind that managed to blow away the fireballs. Landing, he froze as he saw Sasuke finish up another technique, "Katon: Goukakyuu no jutsu!"

Sasuke stopped fueling the grand fireball technique after a few seconds as his chakra started to run out. His shock was evident on his face though, as he saw no sign of his sensei as the flame died down. Whirling around, he began to check various hiding places, _Left? Right? Above? Behind? That would just leave…_ "Below!" Kakashi's hand shot out of the ground and grabbed hold of Sasuke's ankle. Kakashi roared, "Doton: Shinjuu Zanshu no jutsu!" and Sasuke felt himself being rapidly dragged down into the ground.

Kakashi squatted before the head of his last student, "Lesson Three: Ninjutsu. Well you were right, you really weren't like any of the others in that aspect." Sasuke started to struggle in his bonds, as Kakashi walked off, _Hmm, I still have a couple of minutes before I have to fight Naruto again, maybe I should catch up on my reading…_

Sasuke struggle to no avail against his earthen bonds, and was now breathing heavily form the exertion. Then his head slumped as it was hit from behind. Knocked out, Sasuke didn't notice as the mysterious person unearthed him and started running off, carrying him on his shoulders.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

A/N: I think I'll end it here, bwahahaha! I'm evil not to write the last fight aren't I? Well, I'll add more jutsu to it to make it more…mouthwatering. And I still haven't told you what Naruto's Kitsune Shriyoku looks like. I'll tell you in the next chapter. Till then, bwahahahahahahaha… ok I'm done now.


	9. Shruiken and Explosions

A/N: Apologies that this took so long, I don't have much time anymore with homework and stuff. Hopefully I'll be able to finish another chapter by the end of the weekend, but no promises. Tell me how bad this was please. 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Kakashi sat on the middle stump, nose buried in his orange, perverted book and occasionally giggling. Naruto grimaced, _Kami-sama I hate perverts._

**You and me both kit. **

Naurto grinned, it looked like he and the Kyubbi had another thing in common. _Ah well, time to start the party I guess. Thank you Kami-sama for letting me discover this technique…Koushou Kage Bunshin no Justu! (Advanced Shadow Clone) Henge! _Naruto created one Kage Bunshin before turning himself into a windmill shruiken. The Kage Bunshin then jumped into the clearing and yelled, "Nyah nyah, Kakashi-sensei!"

Kakashi looked up and raised his one visible eyebrow. _C'mon Naruto, I'm not that dumb, not after what you just did to my ass._ "What is it Naruto?"

'Naruto' grinned, "A fight Kakashi-sensei! A shinobi fight! And no tricks!"

Kakashi's eyebrow went up slightly, _Alright then you want a fight, I'll give you a fight, and I'll make sure that you learn that in a shinobi battle, everything goes. _He pushed himself off the log, put away his book, and went into a Taijutsu stance. "Alright Naruto, lets go!"

'Naruto' grinned, and yelled, "Alright then! I'll start things off! Kage Bunshin No Jutsu!" Putting his hand into the cross seal, he created several dozen bunshins in a loose circle around Kakashi, then each of them pulled out two shruiken, threw it at him, and started another set of seals. Kakashi's eye widened, _He couldn't have learned that yet..._they stopped abruptly, terminating the line, and shouted "KAI!"

The only thought going through Kakashi's head as he heard that was, _Oh shit…_ Each of the once small, almost harmless shruiken had now turned into a large spinning metal windmill of death, and had abruptly sped up, not having any time for jutsus, Kakashi just avoided them all by jumping up. Looking down, he saw that all of them passed each other where he used to be. Surprisingly, only two of them had hit each other and fell to the ground. It was as if they were thrown like that on purpose…

Kakashi looked up suspiciously at the Narutos. Each of them was standing calmly, even as death by shruiken approached them. The shruiken got closer, they just stood there, then they hit them…and all sailed past as smoke indicated them all as Kage Bunshins. Kakashi hurriedly looked down again, just as both of the shruiken disappeared in ninja smoke and two blonds replaced them. They both threw shruiken up, but only one of them was starting seals. Strangely, the other one had both his arms straight out from his sides, and had closed his eyes. Kakashi was forced to ignore him though as the first one shouted, "Shruiken Kage Bunshin no jutsu!"

Not even paying attention to his about-to-be-shredded-sensei, the first Naruto started scanning the trees around him, with his Kitsune Shriyoku and smiled when heard a puff of smoke indicating a successful Kawarimi, and a sudden, subtle shift in the foliage's chakra pattern. Releasing his doujutsu, he turned to his partner, and said calmly, "8 o' clock. Thirty meters." His only response was a grunt, at which Naruto grinned even more.

Kakashi stared at the odd pair in the center of the clearing. The one who had performed the jutsu against him was now just standing next to the other one, his posture was completely relaxed and open, and he had even closed his eyes and looked like he had gone to sleep. The other one had barely moved from his strange position, except for the occasional twitching and manipulating of his fingers. _Hmm, what's going on?_ Suddenly, the second Naruto opened his eyes and brought his hands together right in front of him. Kakashi blinked, he could have sworn that he just saw blurred red and gold where Naruto's blue eyes had just been before they changed back. _Bloodline? Naw, there are only two doujutsu bloodlines in Konoha. I have one of them and the other is pretty obvious. Still…_He was about to ask Naruto what it was when the second Naruto said, very quietly and without turning his head, "Do it, now." The first Naruto immediately snapped out of his relaxed position and started doing a long line of seals.

Kakashi just stared at the long line of seals being preformed, and felt slight disappointment that his Sharingan wasn't exposed to catch this new jutsu. He stared eagerly at the young blonde, trying to find out its effects. He was concentrating so intently on the first Naruto's hands that he didn't notice the growing buzzing, or the subtle twitches of the second Naruto's fingers. "Kaze no Yaiba!" _What?_

Naruto sliced apart all of the trees around Kakashi's for fifty meters. Staring back at the two, Kakashi had the sinking feeling that he was about to get killed. His suspicions were correct when large shruiken surrounded him.

"Oy, Kakashi-sensei!"

That comment made him look back at the pair of Naruto's. "What?"

"I call this one my Fuusha Dohyou! (Windmill Arena)" Kakashi merely looked bored as he tried to find a way out of this. _Hmm, never guessed that Naruto knew how to make chakra strings. This could be interesting._

"Fuusha Dohyou! READY! SET! GO!" With a slight finger twitch, the first of ten shruiken started on its course towards him. Kakashi merely ducked right under it and was about to say that he could do this all day…at least until he felt the heat of the burn mark cascading down his back. _What?_ Looking back at the shruiken, he now noticed faint trails of red on it.

"Oh and Kakashi-sensei!" At that the sensei turned to stare at his student, "Did I forget to mention that each shruiken has an element surrounding it? Like fire?" Kakashi winced and quickly revealed his Sharingan _Shit; I'm going to need every advantage I have to get out of this. Even a near miss can get me, and he can control these damn things! _"Shall we start again sensei? Now that you're ready? GO!"

This time the controlling Naruto twitched two fingers, and sent two shruiken towards Kakashi. Looking closely, with his Sharingan Kakashi noticed a slight trail of white on them. Relaxing slightly with his ability of foresight, he merely jumped to the ground, only to be met with the same pair as they curved down and came right back at him. Glaring daggers at the two, Kakashi threw some shruiken at the two, but never managed to multiply it due to his dance with the metal. Pulling out two kunai, he attempted to block the two, but only managed to have his weapons frozen, the broke as the large shruiken sailed right past him, managing to cut and freeze parts of his vest.

"Oy Sensei!" Turning back at the two and glaring both at a pair of sky-blue eyes and his shruiken on the ground, he tried to think of a way out of this. _Kawarimi? Too far. Katon? Might work on half; probably make the other half stronger. Doton shield? Nah, he'd just freeze it then bust through it. But what about…yeah…that'll work. _Tuning back to the physical world, he just managed to catch, "…so how bout we turn it up a notch?" Looking around frantically, he noticed that all the shruiken had suddenly started to circle around him. Interestingly, the white and red blended together to make a somewhat pinkish color.

Naruto noticed this turn out, _hmm, nice…reminds me of Sakura's hair, maybe I should teach this to her… _"Hey Sensei! I call this Rakka no Sakura (Fall of the Cherry Blossom)!" Then, as one, each of the shruiken curved inwards into various elliptical orbits around Kakashi. Kakashi himself was hard put to keep track of all the flying weaponry, each whirling at such a speed as to blatantly show their element, fire or ice. Kakashi just stood there though, making a line of seals until he placed his hand on the ground and called out, "Doton: Doroutoku Enchou (Earth Shield Dome)!

All of the shruiken hit the dome and broke threw it, but revealed nothing but a hole. The first Naruto slapped his hands on the ground and thought, _Shit. _The second Naruto jumped, just in time to avoid a questing hand thrusting out of the ground. The other managed to grab the ankle of the first Naruto and pulled him down. Kakashi pulled himself out of the ground in front of the one he trapped. Kakashi's eyes widened when 'Naruto' grinned and disappeared in a poof of ninja smoke. The explosive tags he left behind however, didn't disappear, and thus blew up right in front of him, sending him into the air. The real Naruto pulled back his arms, and swung them forward as fast he could, sending the shruiken attached at the end of the chakra strings on a ballistic course with his sensei.

_Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit. _"Katon: Housenka no Jutsu!" Kakashi used the small fireballs move in midair, trying to dodge all the weapons. That was extremely hard as they kept coming back and swirling continuously around him. Naruto had long since landed, but Kakashi was having a hard time since every time he fell, several windmill shruiken came up to meet him, and he had to pull off a jutsu to keep him from getting sliced and diced. Over time though, he managed to pull a Kawarimi with a stone on the ground. Naruto looked over at him and grinned, Kakashi's breathing was getting harder, and he looked a little tired from the midair fight and jutsus. Naruto yelled, "Kakashi-sensei! Try this!" At those words, Naruto pulled back his shruiken to let them fly at him at the same time. Once they were all on a collision course with Kakashi he let the chakra strings go and started doing seals. The shruiken themselves all unhenged themselves into Kage Bunshins, threw kunai at their objective, and performed hand seals, "KUNAI KAGE BUNSHIN NO JUTSU!"

Kakashi started to sweat as he saw death coming. Looking around, he saw a decent rock, and performed Kawarimi. Looking back at the real Naruto, he saw him start doing seals, and instinctively started copying him. Remembering this particular series of seals, his eyes widened slightly even as his mouth shouted in unison with Naruto's "Suiton: Surryuudan no Jutsu."

Both water dragons crashed into each other, soaking the entire area with water. Kakashi smiled, _Not bad Naruto. _Looking at him again, he noticed him grinning and started slowly doing another set of seals. Kakashi naturally copied again, but this time finished a lot faster than Naruto as he knew this sequence, "Katon: Housenka no Jutsu!" and blew out four fireballs.

Naruto jumped across the river behind him, still doing the seals slowly, once he landed on the other side, he finished the rest of the seals rather quickly and blew out four fireballs to match Kakashi's. Seeing them explode over the river, he grinned. As steam started to rise from the heat, Naruto started to do a third set of seals. Sweat started to pour off him as he knew he didn't have much time before his sensei could see him properly, and he _really _wanted to keep this jutsu to himself.

Kakashi squinted at the steam rising from the river, and raised an eyebrow. _Not bad Naruto. So you don't want me to know what's you're doing next huh? _The steam messed up his vision, and didn't give him a clear enough view of Naruto's hands to know what he what jutsu he was doing. It did come as quite a surprise when Naruto's voice rang out, "Setsugou Youso: Doton Suiton: Dororyuuou Endan (Union Element: Earth Water: Mud Dragon Blast)!"

Kakashi did a double take, _What! But element union jutsus are forbidden! Damn, I wish I saw his hands._ Kakashi then had to deal with a large, dripping dragon coming out of the ground in front of him. _So that's why he did Surryuudan in front of me, he didn't want the jutsu damage; he wanted the water! _Jumping back as he had never seen this jutsu before and didn't know what it did, he just waited. Once the dragon was half out of the ground, it opened its jaws and started a rapid-fire barrage of mud balls at Kakashi. Since he had paused to satisfy his curiosity, he couldn't fully dodge all of them and got splashed with mud from the attack's impact on the ground.

After quite a lot of shots, the dragon finally used up all the mud in the immediate area, and fired three last shots made from the mud making up it's body. Kakashi was puffing slightly, and he was completely covered with layers of mud. Staring back at Naruto, he noticed that Naruto was breathing hard as well_, Hm, I'm surprised that Naruto could last this long with so many high level jutsus. Then again he does have Kyubbi_._ But he should be nearing his limits soon._ Wearily, Naruto, put his hands together in a cross seal, he attempted one last jutsu, "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" Kakashi readied himself…and only one bunshin appeared.

Naruto looked at it, "What! I wanted twenty! Not one!"

Kakashi relaxed somewhat, "Naruto, you're almost at your limit."

Glaring back at his sensei, he retorted, "Like hell I'm at my limit!" He reached back into his pouch and pulled out a blue chakra pill.

Kakashi stared at the strange blue pill, _What is that? It looks like one of the Akiminchi special pills, but he couldn't have gotten that. They guard those pills and it's recipe with their lives! _Naruto placed it into his mouth and swallowed, instantly feeling the effects, Naruto brightened up, and Kakashi's mood started to sink, _Does this guy ever get tired?_ "Now, lets try that again. Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" Another four-dozen bunshins appeared, and Kakashi readied himself for combat. Then all the Naruto's closed their eyes and looked to be in really concentrating, Kakashi tensed up even more for whatever Naruto was planning as he saw all the chakra gathering around their eyes. As one, all fifty Naruto's opened their eyes and shouted, "Kitsune Shriyoku!" Kakashi just stared.

Staring at him were fifty Naruto's, with gold eyes and weird shaped pupils. In each eye, Naruto had three pointed, elliptic, tail-like things extending from the middle. By then, a steady chakra flow had been established to his eyes, and the three 'tails'-for lack of a better word- started to slowly spin and Kakashi found himself entranced. The inner parts started moving first, then the outer tips a little later, which gave the effect that there was a three-tailed spiral in each eye. Eventually, the black of the pupil started to change to a crimson red, and it was then that all one hundred eyes started to move, and broke the spell.

Clone after clone came at him, and Kakashi started to feel his body wearing down. After there were only a few clones left, he heard a whistling and jumped to avoid the sudden barrage of weapons. Looking at where they came from, he was surprised to see Sakura crouched on a tree branch. Then he heard a surprisingly familiar voice, "Katon: Gokakyuu no Jutsu!" performing a Kawarimi with a Naruto clone, he looked up at the face of Sasuke performing the jutsu. Feeling a slight breeze, he turned back towards Naruto and stared, Naruto was nowhere to be seen. Looking down and feeling the familiar weight of the bells still tied to his belt loop, Kakashi pulled down his walked over to the stump. Looking down at the clock, he noticed that there were five minutes left. He pulled his Icha Icha Paradise book out again and started reading and giggling like the pervert he was.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto was grinning as he leaped back to the clearing where Sakura passed out. He was holding in his hands the two bells that his bunshin had given him, delighted in the cool metallic nature of his prize. Inside, he could hear the fox laughing, **I can't believe he never noticed the bells not ringing as he walked away!**

Naruto's grin grew wider, _Yeah, I thought we was supposed to "look underneath the underneath". Stupid geniuses think they know everything._

**Yeah kit, but the one fault that most of them have is their mindset! I'll tell you from experience, geniuses are called geniuses because they're good, but a lot of them are set in their ways, and that gets them killed. I got to my strength and position through sweat and blood, and I personally find the word genius slightly insulting.**

_Ah well, they act stupid, the rest of us profit, now if only the other two won't make such a big fuss over this, this will be perfect._

Naruto landed in the clearing, and walked over to his two unconscious teammates. Looking at them, he saw that both of them were still out. Sakura was still frothing at the mouth slightly, and Sasuke was just extremely dirty and out from the hit Naruto gave him. Naruto sighed, spotting a stream nearby, he grinned. _Suiton: Surryuudan no Jutsu!_ A medium-sized dragon of water came up from the stream, and once it hovered over the two unconscious kids, Naruto released the jutsu, causing all that water to fall down on his teammates.

Both of them woke up instantly, coughing and sputtering while Naruto just held his sides and laughed. Sakura woke up, soaked to the bone and saw Naruto, not thinking or seeing anything else, just jumped up and hit Naruto over the head, "What the hell was that for?"

Holding his aching head, "Well you were asleep! How was I supposed to wake you up?"

Screeching, and hitting Naruto again, "I was not asleep! And you didn't have to soak us!" Here, she paused in her beatings as her conscious mind registered the presence of Sasuke. Rushing over, "Sasuke-kun! Are you alright? Are you hurt? You're going to get a cold like this! Naruto, if Sasuke-kun gets a cold, I'll kill you!"

Sasuke just sat there, thinking about how to get the bells the next time he fought. Sakura sat, continually rattling off questions that he didn't really pay attention to, until one got through his head, "…so you did get bells, right Sasuke-kun?"

Looking up at Sakura, he answered "I got pretty close. I'll get them next time" Sasuke's answer unnerved Sakura, _I didn't even get close, even Naruto did better than me! If Sasuke passes and I don't, we'll be separated forever!_ "Um…Sasuke-kun, it's getting pretty late, maybe you should wait for next time."

Sasuke stared at her, "I _will_ get the bells, and I will pass this test. Alone if need be."

Naruto heard Sasuke's answer and started to laugh. Sakura got up, walked over to Naruto, and hit him again on the head, "Baka! What are you laughing at! Sasuke-kun _will _get the bells next time, just you see!"

Naruto just chuckled a bit and said, "You won't get the bells from Kakashi-sensei."

Sakura hit him again and yelled, "BAKA!" At that, the sound of an alarm clock could be heard throughout the woods, and Sasuke's muttered, "Damn…"

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

All three members of Team 7 were tied to the logs. To Kakashi it was surprising that none of them were complaining much. He stood over them and began lecturing them over what went wrong. "What was the objective of this mission?"

Sakura blinked, "To get the bells so we can eat lunch and not fail."

"Wrong! You must learn to read underneath the underneath," Kakashi yelled.

"Teamwork," Naruto said quietly.

Kakashi said, "Ahhh…" _So he understands…_

Sasuke went, "…"

Sakura just turned to look at him and shout, "WHAT?"

"Right in one Naruto." Kakashi verified for the stunned kunoichi.

Sakura stuttered, "But…but why are there only two bells then?"

Both Naruto and Kakashi stared at her then, in perfect unison they said, "Do you…" Both of them stared at each other until Kakashi motioned for Naruto to continue.

"Do you really think that life will be like that? That everybody wins and nobody loses? Sometimes people have to make sacrifices for the team, even if it means themselves."

Kakashi nodded, "True, for instance," Kakashi pulled out a kunai, used it to cut Sakura loose, then held it Sasuke's throat and yelled, "Sakura! Kill Naruto or Sasuke dies!" He let Sakura stew in such a threat before he put away his kunai again.

Naruto continued, "Kakashi-sensei's test was done to see if we would work together or not. They gave us all the clues, we just had to see underneath the underneath. In Iruka-sensei's class, he told us, and I quote, 'your teams were made to be as equal as possible in terms of ability. Not one team will be composed of all good graduates, and not one of them will be made of all bad ones.'"

Sakura just stood there stupidly, staring at Naruto speak more intelligent words in two minutes than he had said all year.

Sighing, Naruto said, "Each genin team is composed of three genin and one jounin instructor, right?" Sakura nodded, "And there's only supposed to be a 33 pass rate, right?" Sakura nodded again, "Then why would give the entire graduating class, a top chance _67_ for graduation?"

Sakura's face just looked blank.

Naruto sighed again, "Geez, and you're supposed to be smart! It means that if you take what Kakashi-sensei said at face value, we could end up with anywhere from zero to eighteen students! If this was truly and individual test and fourteen students passed, then what do you do with the extra two students, huh? Send them back to the Academy? Divide them into quarters for each team? No, that statement is complete, and total, bullshit! The _only _way to make sure that there's at least a number of students each year divisible by three would be to pass them in _groups _of three, hence, each team. Get it now?"

Sakura though about it for a while, then gave an expression of realization, "Oh, and the only way we would be able to test each team would be through teamwork."

Naruto shook his head and mumbled, "Sheesh, how did you ever get the title, 'top kunoichi'?" Unfortunately for him, Sakura heard him and hit him over the head for it.

Kakashi was a little taken aback by Naruto's revealed intelligence, but quickly recovered, "Yes, well now that you know _why_ you failed, I'm going to tell you just how badly you did so." Sakura leaned against the tree and started sliding down, head down, hands covering her face, and mumbling incomprehensibly.

He looked over at Naruto, "Naruto, you're too direct. You stood there in front of me at the beginning and demanded a fight. Even more so, you had a perfect chance to take the bells from me when you were on my back, after you planted the tags and didn't even try to take it."

He looked down at Sakura "Sakura, you're too obsessed with Sasuke. You got knocked out from a simple genjutsu, and I was told that genjutsu was one of your strong points."

He looked back at Sasuke, "Sasuke, you're strong, and you're good, but you're too ambitious and foolhardy. You immediately charged into a fight against a ninja you knew was strong enough without any back up. At least Naruto had the help of his Kage Bunshins."

Sighing, Kakashi started cutting Sasuke's ropes with his kunai, "But…eventually, in the end, you did work as a team, even though you didn't get the bells. So I suppose you guys pass." At this statement, Sasuke's stare intensified just a bit, and Sakura stopped mumbling and stared up at Kakashi. Ignoring them, Kakashi walked over to Naruto and cut his ropes off. Lifting his hands up, Naruto grinned and stretched, then started doing wild cartwheels and jumps and yells, mostly celebrating the fact that they passed.

Kakashi coughed slightly to get their attention, then said, "It's official, we are now Team 7. We start our duties tomorrow, report to that bridge in the mornings and we'll start our first mission." With that, he pulled out his book and left in a poof of ninja smoke.

Sakura stated, "We passed, and it's all thanks to you Sasuke-kun!" Here she tried to give Sasuke a hug, but he just sidestepped and she fell. Naruto chuckled at the scene.

Sasuke's brow was furrowed in concentration, Naruto stared at him for a while, the started chucking again. Sasuke noticed and asked, "What's so funny?"

Naruto replied, "You. I'll bet you're wondering how we passed."

Sakura stood up and yelled Naruto's face, "We passed because of Sasuke-kun's skill!"

Naruto stepped back a few paces, dug a finger in his ear and tried to get his hearing back, "Nope. Remember what he said? Word for word, 'in the end, you did work as a team, even though you didn't get the bells.' Now tell me, how do you think that happened?"

Sasuke stated, "You, you made two Kage Bunshins and had them henge into me and Sakura, didn't you dobe?"

Naruto sighed, " Would you please stop calling me dobe? And yes, I did do so. You two should be thanking me, because of what I did, we passed."

Sasuke snorted, "Yeah right dobe. You only managed to get on Kakashi-sensei's back through luck, and you didn't even take advantage of it. I was merely caught unawares, if we had fought again, I would have gotten a bell."

Sakura chimed in, "Yeah! Sasuke-kun would have! You never managed to get a bell even with Kage Bunshin!"

With an annoyed look on his face, Naruto placed his left hand in his pocket and stated, "Sasuke, if you had fought then and there, you wouldn't have gotten a bell from him."

"Want me to show you how I'll do it dobe?" Sasuke got into a taijutsu stance

Naruto repeated, "I said, you wouldn't have gotten a bell from _him_."

Sakura froze, then she breathed, "You didn't…"

Naruto grinned, "I did." he pulled his left hand out of his pocket, clenched around something. Opening his fingers, he let two bells dangle from his fingers.

Everybody froze in their positions right there and then, different thoughts going through their head.

Sasuke thought, _What! He got both bells? Is he stronger than me? No! He is not better than me? I was top rookie! I need power to beat Itachi! I could not have been beaten by someone whose scores are dead last! HE IS NOT, CANNOT BE, STRONGER THAN ME!_

Sakura's thoughts went, _Wha…what? Sasuke got beaten by Naruto? No this can't be happening! Sasuke is the strongest! Naruto was dead last in the Academy! He can't be stronger than Sasuke._

Naruto just sighed inwardly and smiled bitterly, _They don't believe me. You can see it on their faces. They don't believe that I could have gotten the bells, simply because of my grades and actions in the Academy. _

**Look on the bright side kit, since you're using this lesson yourself, you'll be less taken in with it in the real world, where it'll mean the most. **

_Kyubbi, if we were your kits, what would you have said and done?_

**Truthfully? I would have said that in the real world, the most they would've found of you three would be ashes and blood. That sensei of yours was holding back, trying not to get himself and you guys killed, you do know that right?**

_Yeah!_

**Good, just checking. **

_Hey!_

**What I would have done was beat the crap out of you guys so bad, you wouldn't have been able to sit down for half a year. That dark haired boy is nothing but trouble, and his inferiority complex doesn't help matters much. The girl is almost as bad, incredibly smart, but chooses to let love life and instinct override her common sense. Waste of a good gift. You though, I might have gone slightly easier on you. Even if you were too direct for my taste, you knew his strength, and he acknowledged yours, oh, and you insulted him to boot, even if he doesn't know it yet.**

_Oh yeah, I still have to set off my prank._

**Hehe. I can't wait to see him tomorrow.**

Naruto grinned as Kyubbi's laughter echoed off his mental hallways. Surprising both Sakura and Sasuke, he put his other hand up in a half-tiger seal, applied chakra, and said, "Boom." A faint, muffled explosion echoed, accompanied by a large angry wail of "NARUTO!"

Laughing, Naruto put the bells back in his pocket, and started walking away, leaving behind a very stunned Sakura and a very angry Sasuke.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

A very pissed off Kakashi stalked the streets of Konoha, walking with a furious rage in his stride, and snapping at more than just a few people as he passed by. After walking down several dead ends, doubling back a few times, he started to relax slightly and headed for the roofs. Leaping along to the other side of the village, he suddenly felt a slight shiver, and his anger flared up again. Jumping down to the street, he stopped in front of a very prestigious building, with several floors and a very wide roof, it was one of the most noticeable buildings in Konoha. Ignoring this one, Kakashi turned towards a very old and rundown once-apartment building. Taking out a kunai, he cut himself and smeared some blood on the decrepit door and went inside. The image that greeted him was gratefully, and unexpectedly different then that on the outside; A nice greeting room with plush chairs and a corner bar, and more than just a few semi-drunk jounins. Ignoring them, he went straight to the steel door at the far end and stepped into the elevator. Going all the way up to the top floor, he stepped out into a very sunny room with a skylight as a roof, into a room filled with other jounin instructors. All talk in the room immediately faded as they turned to see the newcomer. Silence reigned as Kakashi strode to the desk and said in a monotone, "Team 7, Haruno Sakura, Uchiha Sasuke, and Uzumaki Naruto. Passed."

A collective sigh swept the room as they all released their breaths. The jounin at the desk registered the new entry and stated, "That's the last team. Only two other teams this year passed, Asuma's and Kurenai's. Congratulations."

Kakashi turned around, and asked, "So, whom do you have?"

Kurenai immediately responded, " Inuzuka Kiba, Abraume Shino, and Hyuuga Hinata."

Asuma just said lazily, "Ino-Shika-Cho team, new generation."

"So, the second-loudest shinobi, a bug-lover, and the shy Hyuuga heir on the same team?" Kakashi shook his head, "Troublesome."

"Kurenai retorted, "Don't disrespect my team! And what about Asuma's? Have you actually seen the three of them together? Even though _they _were a great team doesn't mean that their children will!"

Asuma calmly stated, "And Kakashi, what about your team? You have the last member of the Uchiha clan, a love-struck girl, and-drum roll please-the loudest shinobi, number one prankster, and self-established future Hokage of Konoha. And those are some of the nicer ones that people have called him, most of the ones I've heard are usually attributed to…his burden." Kakashi sighed, it was true that one of his team members was the Kyubbi holder, and the other was a self-attributed avenger. Throwing a love-struck girl into the mix just made it worse.

Kurenai just stared at Kakashi. _What is it? C'mon, something's off about him today, I know it!_ It was just then that Maito Gai crashed through the door. Announcing, "My eternal rival, Kakashi, I heard that your team passed! Congratulations! They are definitely not up to my team of course! We should have them fight some time! And if my team loses, I'll walk around Konoha 500 times on my hands! If I can't do that, I'll do 1000 pushups! And if I can't do that, I'll kick a log until it breaks! And if I can't do that…" Gai trailed off as he saw Kakashi looking at him.

Kakashi noticed this silence and asked, "Hm? What? Don't let me be in your way, continue. I believe that you were at kicking a log until it broke?" Everybody just stared at him, "What?"

Gai suddenly jumped back and shifted into a fighting stance, completely serious, "Who are you? You are not Kakashi!" At those words, everyone in the room suddenly started going for weapons.

Kakashi's eye widened, but his tone still stayed jovial, "What? I am to Kakashi!"

Gai shouted, "Liar! The real Kakashi would have had his face buried in that atrocious orange book by now."

Kakashi suddenly emitted a slight aura of anger, "I would, if for the fact that that book just so happened to have exploded."

Kurenai said quietly, "The Kakashi I knew would have never let anything happen to his book. You're a fake."

Asuma had pulled out his knuckle knives and muttered out of the corner of his mouth, "Kurenai, dispel his genjutsu."

With his enhanced hearing, Kakashi heard this and started panicking. He turned around to Kurenai, waving his hands and shouting, "No! Don't!" It was too late, Kurenai completed her dispel of the genjutsu and stared at Kakashi, expecting the face to change into someone else's. Kakashi winced.

Everyone in the room stared, and stared, and stared some more. The staring went on for a full minute until Kakashi started to get uncomfortable under the many pair of eyes on him.

"AHAHAHAHAHA!" A burst of laughter from Kurenai made everyone look at her in surprise. _Thump. _She had fallen onto the floor and was now laughing so hard she had to hold her gut in one hand. Unfortunately for her, this caused her to overbalance and fall onto her side. She opened her eyes, took another look at Kakashi, and started anew with fresh peals of laughter. The laughter started building up among the other faces as grins replaced grimaces and everyone started laughing. Kakashi sulked as his dispelled genjutsu revealed what he had been trying to hide. The right side of his pants where the bells had hung was gone, destroyed in the explosion and revealing black boxers with a goofy dog face motif. The bottom of his vest had faired slightly better, not being next to the blast, but was still slightly blackened near the bottom. Unfortunately, nobody could really see it that well, as his entire body was splattered with a orange gook and quite a decent amount of feathers was stuck to him as well. To top things off, quite a lot of the orange stuff had gotten in his hair, where it started reactivating the chemical that was poured into his hair the other day, turning his hair into a mess of orange and pink.

To say that Maito Gai was shocked would have been a huge understatement. Once he had gotten his expressions of shock, and not just a few grins, under his control, he lamented, "Oh, my eternal rival! What could have happened to you that did such a horrendous thing?"

Kakashi snarled slightly, "Naruto did this to me!" At these words, most of the jounins, whom had just slightly recovered, dissolved into laughter again.

Tears streaming from her eyes, Kurenai asked, "Na-Naruto? He did this to you?"

Kakashi nodded sullenly. Kurenai's grin widened until she looked like a maniac, "So you're saying that _you_, Copy Ninja Kakashi, Stealer of a Thousand Jutsus, favorite student of the Yondaime Hokage, was beaten by a very loud, noticeable, idiot of a twelve year old whom is just barely a shinobi?" Wincing at the trap he had just fallen into, Kakashi hesitantly nodded again. Kurenai started laughing her head off again.

Gai brightened at a thought, "Hey Kakashi! When you said that your book was blown up, did you actually mean it?" Kakashi's only answer was to toss a heavily burnt, half of a book at the jounin, hitting him in the face with it.

Feeling sullen, Kakashi started performing the seals for his genjutsu again until he felt someone grabbing his wrist. Looking down, he saw Kurenai's hand grabbing his, preventing him from doing any seals. Looking up, he saw Kurenai's face, still filled with mirth, but slightly serious this time. Looking at him, she shook her head and said, "Let me. It's the least I can do after dispelling yours." Smiling gratefully, Kakashi stepped back, and let Kurenai cast her genjutsu. This time, it was perfect, and didn't give anyone who knew him the sense that there was something off about him again. Once he looked normal again, the laughter slowly started to stop. Everybody picked themselves off the floor as they wiped tears from their eyes and clutched their sides. Every time someone looked at him though, they started clutching their sides in silent laughter.

Feeling somewhat foolish, he picked up what remained of his book from Gai's hands, stuffed it back into his supplies pouch, and strode out the door. Asuma was about to ask Kurenai what she thought she thought about a genin beating the crap out of a top level jounin until she turned around, smiled, and shook her head. Holding up her hand, she started counting down on her fingers. _Three. Two One. _Everyone waited in silence, then they heard it, a large amount of laughter coming from downstairs and an anguished cry, "KURENAI!"

Smiling at the look on Asuma's face, she answered his unspoken question, "Timed genjutsu. I made it up a while ago and I've been dying for an excuse to try it out on someone."

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

A/N: Hehehe! I'm so mean to Kakashi aren't I. I also think I made Kakashi slightly weaker than he should have been, and Sakura slightly dumber. Ah well, chalk it up to pretty boy again. Well, see you next chapter!


	10. Senseis and Skills

A/N: There will be no-I repeat-no pairings in this story. PERIOD. So the NaruHina scene is purely speculative, which means that it's supposed to be according to canon, and can go anywhere I want it to go. So, sorry to all naruhina fans, but no such luck right now. Maybe another fanfic…

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Sakura walked home, brow furrowed in concentration as she tried to figure what just happened. _Did Naruto really beat Kakashi? _

Her Inner Sakura yelled, **Idiot! Only Sasuke could beat Kakashi!**

_But what about those bells…and the explosion?_

**Bah! Probably just had a few bells in his pocket at the time and decided to play a little trick on us with some explosive tags.**

_And the yell?_

**Umm…probably a kage bunshin. Yeah! Naruto can do kage bunshins! And he's pretty well known for playing pranks on people! **

_But…it seemed so real…_

**DON'T SAY YOU'RE FALLING FOR HIM!**

_Ugh, hell no! Sasuke is the one and only guy for me!_

**Good so stop doubting him. Bet he'll knock the socks off Kakashi next time!**

…_yeah…_

Looking up, she saw that she had actually passed her home and had walked back to the Academy through sheer habit. About to turn around, she paused as she quickly calculated the time, _hmm, Iruka-sensei should still be here. I think I'll pay him a visit…_Not knowing why; she suddenly had a compelling feeling to talk to her previous sensei. Walking in, she looked around at the empty halls and felt as if she was in a ghost house. Walking down the hall, she stopped by her old classroom. Opening the door, she felt slight surprise at seeing Iruka-sensei sitting at his old desk and reading from a file. He looked up when the door opened and expressed slight surprise at seeing Sakura standing in the doorway. Smiling, he raised an arm and beckoned, "Come in Sakura! Didn't expect to see you here!"

Sakura quietly closed the door behind her, and took the offered seat. Looking down at his desk, he noticed that it was covered with old class files. Curiosity getting the best of her, she started reading the names, and realized that they were all of the students that had passed.

Seeing her interest, Iruka looked down to where her eyes were staring and smiled sadly. _It's always so hard to let go of the graduates, especially this year…_Gathering the files up; he placed them in a neat pile. Then he pulled open one of his drawers and pulled out a bottle of sake and a cup. Sakura stared. Ignoring her, he popped the bottle open, poured himself a measure, drank it, then brought his head down so he stared right into Sakura's eyes and asked, "Is there anything I can do for you?"

Slightly startled at the question, Sakura nevertheless answered, "Um…not really I guess, I just wanted to talk to you about stuff."

"Like what?"

"Well, I passed my genin test today and I'm kind of confused as to what happened…" From there, Sakura broke down and talked animatedly of her exam and what happened in it. Throughout the whole story, Iruka did nothing except stare at her and smile faintly at Naruto's antics. When she finished, Iruka stared at her for a second before breaking into a grin, "You're lucky." Sakura's quizzical face emerged and Iruka started digging in one of his drawers. Pulling out a black book, he opened it to a certain page and handed it over to his once-student saying, "Hokage-sama gave this to me earlier today, and showed me Kakashi's genin team pass/fail records."

While drinking another cup, he noted with interest that Sakura's face draining of color as she turned the page, "He failed them all! All seven!"

Iruka nodded as he took his book back, "You would be the eighth team he took, and the first one to pass his test." Sakura closed her eyes and leaned back in her chair, thinking how close her team had been to becoming failure number eight.

Iruka noticed this and said, "You almost failed didn't you?"

Sakura's head snapped back up, "How'd you know that?"

Iruka chuckled and downed his third cup, "I guessed."

Smiling sadly she replied, "Yeah…we would have if not for Naruto; he made two Kage Bunshins, and had them henge into me and Sasuke I still don't know how he fooled Kakashi-sensei…"

Groaning at the reminder, "Believe me, Naruto has had years of experience in pulling off his pranks and getting away with them. I should know, I was on the receiving end of several of them. I still can't figure out how he got that bull into my house…" Iruka trailed off, eyes glazed over as he went back to some very memorable but not-so-friendly memories of his favorite student. Sakura just stared.

She finally broke the silence; "Naruto put a bull in your house?"

Chuckling Iruka replied, "Yep. Dumped red paint all over me as well, made a huge mess, and quite a large hole in my wall. He apologized, but I still didn't buy him any ramen for a week." Sakura stared at him again.

Sakura exploded, "No…no ramen for a week! What the hell kind of punishment is that!"

Iruka just stared into her eyes until she flushed and sat back down again. Sipping his sake, he replied, "My kind. Since Naruto loves ramen as much as he does, it was a much better punishment then just yelling at him or something. Ever since then, he's hasn't done anything on that level of destruction."

"Iruka-sensei, why are you drinking?"

Snorting, he finished his cup, "I always indulge a little at the end of the school years. To toast those that have passed, to honor that will pass, and to give homage to those that will grow to greatness. Mostly though, I just drink to try and dull the memories. Seeing you kids almost everyday for nine months makes me feel somewhat like a father."

Sakura stared down at her hands, embarrassed. Looking up at the clock, she saw that it was a full two hours since lunch had passed. Starting to stand up, she said, "Thank you for the talk Iruka-sensei. I'm sorry to have bothered you for so long."

Iruka merely dismissed her worry with a wave of his hand and a cheery smile as he poured his fifth cup, "Don't worry about it, these files aren't going anywhere soon, and I have the whole summer to do it. Is there anything else I can do for you though?"

About to leave, Sakura paused as something crossed her mind, she turned around and answered, " Well actually, there's been something I've been meaning to ask you."

Putting his hands behind his head, Iruka leaned back in his chair, closed his eyes and said, "Fire away."

"How did Naruto pass his genin exam?"

Iruka stiffened, he then drawled out, "I take it that you asked Naruto this and he told you to ask me?"

"Yes."

Slowly, Iruka took his hands from his head, brought his chair back to four legs, then opened his eyes and stared intently at Sakura, "Sit down."

"Huh?"

"Sit down." Confused, Sakura nevertheless did what she was asked.

Once she was seated, Iruka finished his cup and immediately poured himself another. Finishing that as well, he drawled in a somewhat slurred voice, "Alright, tell me what you think of Naruto."

"Huh? Why?"

Drinking another cup, "Just tell me."

Looking confused and slightly annoyed she said, "Uh…ok. I thought that he was an idiot; always goofing around, always playing pranks, and just generally being annoying and loud. Not a very good shinobi."

Smiling faintly as he drank another cup, Iruka said, "I didn't ask you for your past opinion. I'm asking you what you think about him now."

Scowling somewhat, she said, "He's an ok shinobi I guess. Though I do agree with Sasuke in that him getting the bells must have been a fluke. There is no way that he could have gotten him on his own, not against a jounin. Now Sasuke though…" Her face took on a dreamy and glazed over expression as she thought about her obsession. Iruka frowned a little at the quick mood change. Letting her stay like that for a while, he continued downing sake like there was no tomorrow.

Shaking herself out of her daydream, she asked, "So, how did Naruto pass?"

When Iruka raised his head to look at her, she sweat dropped. Iruka's face was one of someone who was fully, and irretrievably drunk, "Huh? Wass 'hat? Wha you say?"

Sakura reeled back slightly at the smell of sake on her sensei's breath, she waved her hand to try and clear the air. Right then the sliding door opened, and both occupants looked over to see the new arrival.

Looking over the slightly disgusted Sakura and the drunken Iruka, Sarutobi nodded and said, "Sakura, I think that it's time that you be going, I'll take care of Iruka here."

Sakura nodded and was about to rush out when she paused again. "Um, Hokage-sama? Do you know how Naruto passed the genin exams?"

Sarutobi nodded, and then started pushing her out gently, "Of course."

Sakura walked over the threshold, "Then how?"

Putting on a thinking face, he frowned slightly and said, "Well, there were a few other factors involved, but I believe that the main one was that Naruto beat a weapon-specialist chuunin and managed to teach himself a high-level kinjutsu, Kage Bunshin." Smiling slightly at her startled face, he gently pulled the door closed and locked it. Turning around, he saw Iruka pull his head off the desk and cancel the henge on his face.

Iruka turned to face the Hokage and started to say, "Hokage-" until said person silenced him with a finger to his lips. Sarutobi turned to face the door and started a short line of three seals, once done he turned around and said, "We can speak freely now. Sairensa no Jutsu. (Silence no jutsu)" He rubbed his chin, as his eyes took on a calculating glint, "You know, I've seen you fight seriously before, and with your deception skills, why didn't you ever apply for the Jounin exam?"

Iruka just said respectfully, "Hokage-sama, I didn't want the responsibilities that came with the title, I just wanted to teach."

Groaning, Sarutobi waved his hand and pulled his pipe out from his mouth, "I not here on official business, and I don't want to be, so don't call me by my damn title!"

Startled, Iruka asked, "Er. So what should I call you then? And respectfully, why wouldn't you wanted to be called Hokage-sama?"

Chuckling bitterly, "Sarutobi-san is good for now. And I don't want to be reminded of my successor in anyway, not today. Remember what today is?"

Sagging slightly, Iruka mumbled quietly, "The Yondaime was made Hokage thirteen years ago today." A long silence passed between the two.

"Do you know…" Sarutobi began quietly as he stared at the wall and nothing at all.

"Hmm?"

Slightly louder, Sarutobi repeated, "Do you know why he chose today of all days to hold his ceremony?"

Staring at his leader, Iruka replied honestly, "Actually no. I always assumed that you decided he was fit for the job and just decided to give it to him one day."

Laughing, heartily this time though, the Sandaime replied, "Nah. I had decided to pass on the job somewhere back in mid March, but he managed to convince me to hold on to the job for another three and a half months. When I asked right before the ceremony why he did that, he pulled open the side of the curtain and showed me why." Staring right into Iruka's face, he said, "He wanted it to be on a day when all the Academy students were free and able to come. He said that it wouldn't be fair to not let the future generations of shinobis not to be in on this event."

Smiling, Iruka said, "That sounds like the Yondaime alright. Always caring for the little ones. I have an exceptionally fond memory of when he came by to the park one day and played with us kids."

Staring at the teacher, Sarutobi suddenly gave out a great laugh and said between chuckles, "Haha! So that's where he went! I always wondered where he went every time he disappeared when he was supposed to be doing paperwork. Never could track him with that blasted shunshin no jutsu of his."

Chuckling with him, Iruka suddenly turned serious and asked, "So, what did you really come her for?"

Sarutobi instantly stopped laughing and put on a neutral expression, "Its about Naruto."

Smiling knowingly, Iruka went back to his desk and pulled out a file. "I assume that you want to know the reason behind the sudden change?"

"You're damn right I do. I just watched his test with his sensei and did I get a surprise when he pulled off a high-level jutsu that most chuunins don't even know how to do."

Iruka walked around his desk and gave him the file. When he received it, Sarutobi was fairly shocked at the weight. Pulling up the seat that Sakura had just inhabited, he opened the file and started flipping through it, almost idly at first, then with growing seriousness as he read more and more. Looking up, he glared at the teacher.

Iruka winced, he wasn't used to such a commanding glare from the kind, old Hokage. "Everything there is true. I looked up the old security tapes of my classes' target practice like you said, and you were right, I started finding patterns in his throwing."

Sarutobi just shook his head slightly, slightly shocked as he continued reading, "Yeah, I thought he was holding something back ever since he beat Mizuki, but not this much. He practically invented a new weapon style! Non-lethal hits with lethal weaponry!"

Iruka nodded, "I was particularly impressed with his ability to throw a kunai ring-first. I've talked some with some of the senior weapon-masters, and they told me that its, and I quote, 'Damn hard to impossible. A kunai is a weapon built to kill, not to incapacitate, which is why we make the bloody blade heavier than the handle! So it can be thrown accurately and hard, blade-first! If anyone has ever pulled it off, its either a mistake or a lot of luck.' End quote. After that, I gathered them all, and showed them tapes of Naruto throwing them, one after another, handle-first," Iruka chuckled at the memory, "Naturally, half of them accused me of rigging the tape and left in a furious rage, horribly insulted because a twelve year old boy could do something they couldn't. The other half…" Iruka paused here and started laughing so hard that the Hokage was momentarily concerned until Iruka waved his hand to show that he was alright.

Once he had regained his breath, he continued his story, "The other half demanded the identity of the shinobi, wanting to place themselves under him so they could learn such a revolutionary technique! Imagine it Hokage-sama! Men of great repute and well into their prime…all bowing at the feet of an Academy student!" Here, Iruka started laughing again, and this time, Sarutobi joined in.

Eventually, they sobered up and Iruka started to stand at attention again while Sarutobi flipped through the file again. Eventually he commented, "You mentioned here that his kunai and shruiken aim and distance are much better than the others?"

"Yes, he is."

"How do you know this?"

Iruka started, "Huh? I could have sworn that I put it in the report."

The Sandaime merely shrugged and stated, "I just wanted to hear it coming from your mouth."

Shrugging, Iruka said, "I started to notice that every time Naruto misses, his weapon goes off into the forest, which is fifty meters behind the targets. Once I actually walked out there myself, I saw lots of indents made from kunai and shruiken. As for aim…" Iruka shrugged again, "You notice the pictures of the target he always uses? The edges and sides of them are dented with hundreds of blade marks, not one of them farther than half an inch in. The entire target is ragged at the edges because of that, in fact, aside from the edges and the middle, the entire target is clean, devoid of practice marks. He's also somehow he even managed to get the shruiken and kunai to hit the _sides _of the target. Full aim straight on is hard enough, from a curve… I tried it and couldn't get it to hit after a hundred throws. The only person I know that's better than him is a girl I taught a year ago. She had one hundred percent accuracy, no matter the conditions, and the next best after them is a long step down."

Shaking his head slightly, the Hokage muttered, "You must mean Ten-ten, Ikegata Ten-ten, daughter of the Master of Blades."

Curiously, since there were several blade masters residing in Konoha, Iruka inquired, "Which blade master do you mean?"

The Hokage looked him sharply for a moment before his eyes softened, "Not a blade master, _the _Master of Blades." Iruka's drew in breath sharply at the title, and Sarutobi nodded. It was the usual reaction to the name, as 'The Master of Blades' was a title given to a retired ANBU member for his unfailing accuracy and proficiency in anything and everything with a sharp edge. It was said that he once managed to kill an entire squadron of soldiers with nothing more than a broken beer bottle and shards of glass. Unfortunately, someone managed to cut his eyes, rendering him blind, and therefore useless, since all the accuracy in the world was useless if you didn't know where the enemy was. The Hokage sighed at the loss of such a fine shinobi, and flipped through the pages again, then paused on one of them.

"He can hit the back of the target? How?"

Iruka scratched the back of his head sheepishly, "I really have no idea, all that I know is that a few meters past the target, the shruiken, and its always shruiken for this, suddenly curves around and hits the target in the back. I think it might be wires, but all he does and flex his fingers a bit. Anyway, his aim with that technique is not perfect, but fairly commendable as he's aiming blind."

"Hmm," Sarutobi was thinking hard over this mystery, "It might be chakra strings, like puppeteers use, but I have no idea where he would learn a technique like that…"

Iruka's face lit up with understanding, "Oh yeah, in the jutsu section, I said that Naruto was learning from the Kyubbi."

Sarutobi's head looked up so fast an audible _crick _could be heard, "WHAT!"

Iruka winced as the aged Hokage started massaging his neck, but continued on gamely, "I asked Naruto how he got so strong, and he said that he and the Kyubbi had started talking around the beginning of the school year. I'm guessing that the Kyubbi taught him those jutsus, and had been training him in other areas as well."

Sarutobi studied him critically before he nodded; he closed the file and said, "Well, if the Kyubbi is training him, then we don't have to worry to much. I assume you were one of the kids he showed his other summons?" Iruka nodded. Sarutobi stood up, and handed the file back, "Well I'm glad that jutsu wore off. And since it's Kyubbi, I guess we mortals shall just have to take a step back to demon training, after all," Sarutobi gave a wicked grin, which was answered by confusion of Iruka's face. The Hokage looked slightly shocked. "He never told you?"

Not having any idea what he was talking about, Iruka decided to go down the safe pass and shook his head. Sarutobi's grin widened as he started explaining. "You know that the fox summons was incredibly versatile and strong, right? Well how do you think they got that way? Kyubbi trained his kin to the point of exhaustion and beyond, earning him a fairly infamous name among the foxes, as common knowledge as him being the lord of foxes; he's the Trainer from Hell. I wonder how he'll fare against a student with as much energy as he does?"

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Unbeknownst to the two, Naruto was currently getting his mental ears yelled off him by a very irate demon kitsune. **YOU DAMN BAKA! HOW MANY TIME HAVE I TOLD YOU YOU"RE NOT READY TO USE MULTIPLE-CONTROL TECHNIQUES LIKE THE FUUSHA DOHYOU (Windmill Arena)!**

_WHY THE HELL NOT! IT WORKED PERFECTLY DIDN'T IT?_

Naruto got the distinct feeling that if the Kyubbi had fingers, he would pulling out his hair in frustration. **IT WORKED BECAUSE I WAS MAKING IT WORK! **The Kyubbi sighed, **Baka, the chakra control required for that technique is incredibly high, why do you think most people don't use chakra strings, even though they're incredibly useful? They're either too lazy to train, or they just don't have the natural precise chakra control required to make them. **The Kyubbi snorted **Its also precisely for those reasons why true puppeteers are few and far between, their entire battle style is based around chakra strings and maintaining that control even in stressful conditions. They also need a fairly large chakra reservoir needed for the long battles. **

Fairly confused now, _Then why don't you let me try? It's not like it'll blow up in my face, right?_

The Kyubbi gave a dry laugh at this statement. **It won't blow up in your face, but if you don't control the strings precisely, as well as the jutsus, you can get a lot worse than a simple explosion. For instance, if there isn't enough chakra in the strings, you can't do a thing with the shruiken except send it faster, if there's too much, the shruiken is pulled towards you. Like you know already, less chakra to go faster, more to pull it back, but the overall change in the chakra has to be kept smooth, a sudden jump could have that thing taking your head off before you noticed, and I _really _want to keep you alive for as long as possible.**

Naruto blanched, _So why did you wait until now to tell me that?  
_

**Because I didn't think you would go farther then one. And I exhausted myself trying to save your ass after holding back and regulating your chakra from this cell.**

_Oh, well, thanks, I guess. _Silence ruled as Naruto walked home. _Hey, wait a minute, if you were holding back my chakra, where did the rest go?_

**Oh, that? I still have it. It's just sitting here, now that you don't need it.**

_Well give it back will you? I'm already getting tired, and I don't want to take anymore Uzumaki pills._

**Hold your horses. Just take a few regular soldier pills, this chakra is slightly unstable now that it's been my almighty presence, giving it back might be painful. Besides, I have an idea… just stop by some stores and buy…say a few dozen, second hand kunai and some cloth, preferably silk, but fairly small is ok. Oh and you might as well buy some food while you're at it. Something with vegetables, BUT NO RAMEN!**

Grumbling, but doing as he was told, Naruto walked down to the market district. Finding the kunai and food, he started looking for some silk, but was getting distracted by muttered comments from the Kyubbi that constantly piqued his interest. Not looking where he was going, he bumped into one Hinata Hyuuga.

"Oh! Ko-konnichiha Na-naruto-kun."

"Hey! You're the girl with dog boy and the bug freak, right?" Hinata's head hung at the thought of Naruto only knowing her through her teammates.

**IDIOT KIT! SHE HAS A NAME YOU KNOW!**

"Oh. Sorry Hinata, I just suck with names."

"Th-that's ok Na-naruto-kun." Naruto looked over his shopping list again and frowned. Hinata noticed this and asked, "Wh-what's the ma-matter Naruto-k-kun?"

"Huh? Oh, I just can't find anybody here that sells silk." A thought struck him, "Hey! You're a girl! Do you know where I can find a fabric store?"

Hinata almost fainted. _Did-did Naruto-kun just ask me to help him? YES! _"Um. Yes. F-follow me please."

As Naruto followed a staggering Hinata, she thought, _I can't believe this! I'm helping Naruto-kun! He's following me! YES! _Eventually, they reached quite a worn-down shop, Naruto said his thanks, and went inside. Once he brushed aside the beads, he was immediately set upon by a smallish gray blur, which started running a circle around him. Naruto's shinobi training immediately took effect, and he threw a barrage of punches at the gray mass. He was quite surprised when they were all either blocked or dodged, and even more so when he suddenly found himself flying through the air to hit a conveniently placed pile of clothing.

Moaning, a old lady entered his field of vision upside down and started clucking, "I'll give you points for effort and reflexes, but your speed is sorely lacking and your attacks…pfft, well I just trashed your ass and I'm way into my sunset years."

Naruto was quite surprised at such an astute analysis, and decided to respond with the all-round intelligent answer, "Huh?"

"Lacking in brains too."

An aggrieved, "Mother!" was heard, and Naruto suddenly felt himself lifted up onto his feet. Once up, he saw a young man arguing with the old lady.

"Mother, how many times have I asked you not to attack the shinobi customers?"

"Pfft, you call these pathetic pieces of trash shinobi? Back in my day, the genin were a lot better trained. It's almost painful seeing Konoha's next generation so damn weak."

"Mother, not in front of the customer please!"

"Bah! You're right for once, why should I argue about such a weakling." Saying as such, the old woman walked out the back door.

The young man gave a great sigh, then slapped his forehead, "Oh! I'm sorry! I forgot you were up there."

"Huh?" Looking to his sides, Naruto noticed that he was being held up by several pieces of clothing. They lowered him down to the ground, then went back to the pile and went back to being normal. Looking back at the storekeeper with awe on his face, he burst out, "COOL! How did you do that! Are you a shinobi? Can you teach me?"

Surprised, the man just stared back. He was saved from answering when a young woman came up and just shook him out of his daze. Smiling prettily at Naruto, she said, "His name's Ling. I'm Kaori, his wife. Who are you?"

"Uzumaki Naruto. Hey Ling! Can you teach me those techniques?"

Ling recovered enough to answer, "Sorry. Ok as for your questions before, I used chakra strings, no, I'm not a shinobi," here he muttered under his breath, "least, not anymore," then continued in his normal tone, "and I can't teach you."

Naruto's face fell, "Why not?"

Ling's face turned white as a sheet as he said, "Because my mother said that if I ever taught those techniques to someone, she'd find some way of making the rest of my life hell."

Naruto froze, he had only felt a fraction of the old woman's power, if it was all unleashed at a specific target…he shivered. Kaori noticed this and added, "However…" Naruto looked up.

Kaori continued, "If you can get my mother-in-law to teach her yourself, you could get around her threat."

Naruto brightened at those words. "Hey, thanks!

"You're welcome. Now, why are you here? I highly doubt it's because of my husband's shinobi skills."

"Oh yeah!" Naruto dug into his pocket for his list, "Do you have any silk?"

He was answered by a cry from the back room, "Do we have silk? Of course we have silk! Son, bring this boy back here! He interests me."

Naruto paled as Ling's face looked on sympathetically, then he said, "You might want to hurry up Naruto, it's not a good idea to keep my mother waiting too long."

Naruto started to walk confidently towards the door, but with each step, his knees started to shake some.

**HAHAHA! Is the almighty future Hokage of Konoha scared? Scared of an old woman? HAHAHAHA!**

Hearing the Kyubbi make fun of him strengthened his resolve, and he walked through the doorway muttering, "...baka kitsune…"

Once he saw the back room though, he froze in shock. There must have been some sort of seal placed on this room; because there was no way that there was all this room behind the small store. In the middle of it all, sat the old woman, back to the door, and working over a table. She yelled back at him, "Well hurry up! I haven't got all day you know."

Naruto quickly did as he was told and plopped himself down on the chair in front of her. She had her head down over a large piece of cloth, and was tracing one finger down a line inked into the fabric. He was surprised when the cloth split at the line where she traced her finger, and curious, he paid closer attention. At first he couldn't see anything, but using his Kitsune Shiryoku, he finally saw the faint trace of chakra on the cloth, and the bright, concentrated chakra coming from her finger. Disabling his doujutsu, he stayed silent, not wanting to disturb her work. Things stayed silent for a minute, until she said, "If you don't ask questions, you'll never get answers."

"But I don't want to disturb your work baa-chan."

"Bah, don't call me 'baa-chan' it makes me feel older than I already am. My name's Tsubaki, use it."

_Ooooook…_ "Um, Tsubaki-san, how are you doing that?"

Sounding amused, "You've never seen a chakra scalpel before? Oh yeah, you're too young. Well, here's a free lesson. A chakra scalpel is the main manipulation of chakra that a medic-nin uses, both for battle and for field surgery. It was made to cut through skin and muscle and make the minimum amount of damage, but I adapted it here for tailoring."

Quietly, Naruto said, "You were a medic-nin."

"I was a medic-nin." Silence reigned for a full minute.

Then Naruto asked, "What rank?"

"When I retired, I was jounin."

More silence, finally, Tsubaki finished cutting the fabric, and put it aside, giving her full attention to Naruto, "Ok kid, cards on the table, what do you want?"

Naruto stared back into her eyes, "Chakra control, strings, and scalpel, maybe some basic tailoring if you have time."

Tsubaki had an amused look in her eye, "No medic jutsus?"

"I'm never going to have the control for them, and you know I don't need them anyway."

She nodded, "I approve, straight up and truthful. I'll throw a few of them in anyway, never know when your medic will need a medic."

Naruto was hard-put to keep in his face straight, "So does that mean that you'll teach me?"

"Not so fast young 'un. I approve of your character; I have yet to see if your strength matches it. If you want to win my respect, fight me. Next Saturday, after whatever pishposh genin duties you have, six o 'clock, training field twenty-five. And if you want to win, you better start training now so, and you bring everything you have with you, 'cause I won't go easy." Finishing her sentence, she grinned at him. Naruto grinned confidently right back, then got off his chair and ran back outside, where Ling and Kaori were waiting.

Kaori was the first to ask, "So, what did she say?"

Naruto grinned up at them, "She said that if I win her respect, she'll teach me."

Ling asked, with trepidation, "Just how did she say you were going to earn her respect?"

"A fight! Next Saturday."

Ling and Kaori exchanged glances, then started walking around and picking out certain items of clothing. Naruto was confused as to what was happening, and asked, "Huh? What's going on?"

Ling answered, "That sadistic mother of mine wants to fight you, and you're not ready to fight her yet."

Naruto asked, "Aww, c'mon. How hard can it be to fight an old lady?"

**Baka kit! She threw _you_ halfway across the store, remember?**

Suddenly scared, he asked, "How strong was she?"

In a serious tone of voice, Ling replied, "Jounin at age twenty-five, ANBU at age twenty-eight. Had no more than superficial scratches, and was infamous for her ability to make her kills look as if they were from natural causes. Retired from ANBU after five years and became a general jounin medic-nin for a year. Became Head Medic-nin at the hospital after Tsunade left for sixteen years. Retired at age fifty, thirteen years ago."

Naruto was suddenly nervous at fighting the old lady. _Shit. Ex-ANBU. Can probably heal injuries as fast as I deal 'em. I am so screwed!_

**Damn right you are kit! **

Naruto was shaken out of his shock when a large pile of clothes was suddenly dropped in front of him. Ling brushed the dust of his face, "Ok, that should be it. Now, I can't teach you anything, but I can give you some advice. One, don't try to beat her, because you can't, go for the short wins, and get in as many hits as you can. Two, bulky armor won't help much against the chakra scalpel, but they will prevent it from going as deep. Three, medic-nins are usually the first to be targeted, and they had to get from one patient to another, so they are usually very fast. Unfortunately, medic-taijutsu is very subtle, and extremely hard to counter without sustaining damage, so most people just dodge the attacks. You figure out what you need to concentrate on to stand a chance against her."

Here Kaori stepped in, "Now, these pieces of clothing were made specifically for shinobi use, so if you buy them, they might just come in handy." Naruto looked down at the clothing, there were several shirts and pants, and a few pieces of light armor, he picked up a piece, and was surprised at it's weight; it was heavier than he thought it would be. Kaori continued, "The pants have a lot of hidden pockets, so you can store extra weapons, the shirts are specifically made to hold extra kunai or shruiken up the sleeves, which can also double as extra armor, and they're spring loaded so you can get them in a hurry. These bracers are special though. We got these when a traveler sold them to us; actually, he sold us these clothes as well, now that I think of it… Anyway, we found that if you put a little chakra in, well, you try."

Naruto rolled up one of his sleeves and strapped a bracer on. Then he focused a little chakra out, and was immediately surprised when overlapping, fin-like metal plates snapped out, providing slight armor. Looking at the edge of the armor, he found there was a long razor blade about an inch out on the outer side of his arm. Looking over the other pieces, he found that there were pieces for the entirety of both arms and legs. Looking up, he asked happily, "How much?"

When all had been added up, including his silk, he found it to be slightly on the expensive side, but still within his bank account. Paying for his items, Naruto happily walked out of the store, money pouch lighter, but feeling much richer.

Remembering the odd shopping list he had gotten, Naruto thought-yelled, _Hey Kyubbi-sensei! What's the silk for?_

**I'd explain it, but you'd probably get lost, kit. Just do what I say, and you'll have a new weapon to play with.**

_Oh…ok._

_­_

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto stood in the middle of his training ground.

**Alright kit, in order to make this happen, you need to be able to focus your chakra through the kunai.**

_That's easy!_

**Think so? Try it on one of the old kunai.**

Naruto pulled out one of the kunai he had bought, and forced chakra into it. Immediately, the kunai cracked, then broke into several pieces. Kyubbi's voice took on an amused tone **I said focus, not force. There's a difference you know.**

_So tell me what the hell it is then!_

**When you force chakra into an item, you run the risk of it breaking under the strain. If you focus it though, it'll be like an extension of your own chakra pathways. Forcing it means you're forcing an unknown energy into something that usually doesn't us it. Focusing it means you slide the chakra in, letting it adapt. If done right, you could focus all of your chakra through that kunai and it wouldn't even get warm. Get it?**

In response, Naruto took out another kunai and tried 'sliding' his chakra into it. This time, kunai shattered, but didn't break.

**Less force kit.**

It took Naruto almost two hours, and many broken kunai, to finally perfect the technique, but in the end, _Hey Kyubbi! I finally got it!_

**Eh? What? Oh. Good job. Wake me up in a few hours would you?**

_YOU"RE SLEEPING! NOW! GET THE HELL UP YOU STUPID FOX!_

**YOU STUPID BRAT! YOU NEARLY MADE ME DEAF! HOW WOULD I BE ABLE TO HELP YOU THEN? HUH? YOU TELL ME THAT!**

Naruto grumbled, "…stupid baka of a furball…

**I HEARD THAT!**

_WHO CARES! TELL ME WHAT THE HELL TO DO NEXT!_

**Brat. Do the same thing with each of the steel kunai. I can almost guarantee that it will be harder.**

Muttering many unsavory things about foxes in general and one in particular, Naruto reached into his jacket and pulled out his weapons scroll. Unrolling it, he found the seals he used for the kunai, and unlocked it. Pulling out the six steel kunai he had, he rolled up the scroll, dropped five of the kunai, and started pouring chakra into the sixth.

Six hours later…

Naruto was puffing from chakra depletion. He had already exhausted half of his soldier pills in trying to stay awake, and a good portion of his own Uzumaki pills. Even so, he had a happy smile on his face, and was lying on his back, kunai still held in his hand, staring at the moon, at the stars.

_S-so Kyubbi. Wh-what's next?_

Kyubbi's voice could have almost been described as tender and caring, **Get some sleep kit, you're going to need it tomorrow. I'll take over for a while to get you home.**

_Wha…N-no, I can…still go…on… _Naruto was asleep, and Kyubbi woke up. Looking around, he silently noted the sudden jump in ambient chakra levels in the surroundings. About to pick up Naruto's stuff, he hesitated, then his face broke into a wicked grin. **_Well, I was going to give this to him tomorrow, but hey, what's a few more hours going to do to his body? Well, besides horribly wear it out anyway, and there being lots of labor work tomorrow too…_**

Grinning in a manner that could only be described as diabolical, Naruto/Kyubbi bit his thumb then quickly scribed a quick seal on the back of his left hand. In the end, there was a solid circle drawn on Naruto's left hand, and inscribed inside a was a twelve pointed star, with ten demon numeric symbols placed evenly on the outside of the circle, zero to nine, the zero at the top most point. Outside the numerals, there was a circle of symbols encompassing the first seal, giving the whole appearance somewhat of a clock face. Satisfied with his work, Naruto/Kyubbi concentrated on slightly mixing both Naruto's and his chakra in his hand, then concentrated it all into his fingertip. Biting it, he slowly, carefully, placed one red drop in the middle of the clock. With a quick flash of red light, the whole seal sunk into the skin, and the blood turned black as ink. Slowly, two curving, thick lines emerged from the dot in the middle, like minute and hour hands o a clock. Grinning at a seal well done, Naruto/Kyubbi gathered chakra into his finger, and slowly, meticulously adjusted the 'hour' hand so that it pointed to the demon number two, he immediately felt it's effects, and grinned even wider.

Sighing, Naruto/Kyubbi started to pick up what he had left on the forest floor when he thought of something, thinking some more for a few moments, he quickly drew another circle of seals around the first, insuring that it couldn't be removed so easily. He activated it with Naruto's chakra, resulting in both seals glowing a bright blue for a full minute, then dying down until there remained only a faint outline of the second seal, and a faint blue glow coming from the first. Nodding, he dispelled the chakra gathered into his hand, allowing the seal to fade into the back of his hand. Slinging what Naruto brought with him on his back, Naruto/Kyubbi leaped up onto a tree branch, and left for the village his container called home.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

A/N: Alright, two things. A. You all should know what I'm doing with the seal. If not, too bad, you'll have to wait. And B. If any of you have ever read the Last Rebel, then you know where I got the tailor idea. Now before any of you start flaming me for that, I already got his consent to write this. So, for all of those who want to rip my throat out for that, I'll say this in as a polite as manner as possible, BUG OFF AND DON"T YOU DARE FLAME ME! Thank you. Till next time. 


	11. Missions

A/N: This has absolutely nothing to do with my fanfic, but I've read a great fanfic called Trial and Error. Also, someone asked how Naruto got that bull into Iruka's house, and as I actually pulled it out of thin air, I've been wondering just how he did so myself, so I thought, and thought, and thought, and broke my brains and had to get new ones, and thought some more, and I came up with an answer. Kamiwari. Naruto drags bull up to Iruka's house, Naruto breaks in, Naruto switches places with bull. _Voila! _Instant destruction, and no normal traces of getting a bull in, such as a broken wall or two… Oh, I also added a scene from another fanfic. Before you flame me, I asked him, and he said that it was alright. I think some of you might recognize it…

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

**Hey kit…WAKE UP!**

"Wahaggh!" Naruto quickly sat up in bed. Looking around, he saw that he was back in his apartment, "Huh?" Shrugging it off, Naruto quickly threw himself out of bed…and promptly landed on his face.

"Uhhh…ouch." Naruto soon found it a challenge to even stand up. Trying to get to the bathroom, he started wondering why his body suddenly felt a lot heavier. Brushing his teeth was harder, washing his face was harder, and by the time he managed to get his stuff together, Naruto was starting to feel the strain.

Walking down the street, Naruto decided to take the rooftops, and tried jumping onto one of them. Surprisingly, he could jump about a foot off the ground, but no higher. Trying again, he got the same results. Frowning, he tried to use chakra to enhance his jump, but his grip on it was…unstable, at best. Suddenly the reason why he was so weak dawned on him. He sat down on the street and started crying. _Nooo! I've a regular human! My ninja skills! My chakra! My jutsu! Noooo! Come back!_

Inside, Naruto could hear echoing laughter. **Would you miss me as well?**

His temper flaring, Naruto jumped up…or tried to jump up. Spitting out gravel, Naruto growled as he picked himself off the street amid the laughter. _Never, you stupid furball. _

Since he was in an especially good mood today, the Kyubbi decided to let the 'furball' remark slide. **Ah well. You still can't jump higher than a regular human. **

_You! You had something to do with this! Didn't you!_

**Maybe I did. I'll tell you when I wake up, shouldn't be later than two in the afternoon, maybe three, possibly by five, most definitely by eight. 'Night!**

_What! Wait! You can't leave me like this! BASTARD FOX!_

Naruto got up and started to walk to the bridge where they were supposed to meet, all the way cursing uppity animal spirits. On the way, he suddenly panicked that the thought of no jutsus. Quickly putting his hands together in a seal, he tried a simple bunshin. It failed. He tried again, and it still failed. Panicking slightly, Naruto tried again, but this time shoved a lot more chakra into the jutsu than usual, and was rewarded when it finally worked. Sighing with relief, he tried kamiwari.

The rest of the trip continued like that; with Naruto trying out low-level jutsus and, from whether they worked or not, tried to find out how much more chakra was required now. Through much trial and error, he deduced that the new amount of chakra needed was about ten to twelve times more than usual. Once he figured that out though, he scowled since that meant he was going to tire out in jutsu battles a lot quicker than usual, and he still had that fight coming up.

_Yo fox!_

Silence.

_Oh great and mighty Kyubbi, will you answer this humble landlord?_

Silence.

_STUPID FURBALL!_

Silence.

Naruto grumbled, and kept walking. Apparently his tenant was actually sleeping, though he really needed to have a quick talk with him soon, regarding a certain fight at six o clock, and him getting his face ground into dirt. Turning a corner and spotting his teammates, Naruto quickly shoved aside his complaints and shifted his face into a happy smile, "Sakura-chan! Sasuke-teme!"

Sauske's eyebrow just twitched slightly at his new name, but he just snorted and ignored him. Sakura's response was a little louder.

"DON"T YOU DARE CALL SASUKE-KUN A BASTARD!" Stomping over to Naruto, she drew back her arm and let him have one right in the face. Groaning and picking himself out of the various debris of what had once been part of a wall, Naruto walked back onto the bridge and started reading up on a jutsu in his copy of the Scroll of Forbidden Seals. _Lemme see, what lucky jutsu did I pick today…hey, wait a minute…_ Naruto quickly scanned the rest of the scroll, _What the hell…its an unsealing jutsu, well it _is _the Scroll of Forbidden _Seals. _But this still sucks, and I thought I would be able practice a new jutsu today. _Sighing, Naruto stuck the scroll back into his ninja pouch. Waiting for his incredibly late instructor, he was about to resign himself to a long, long day when he remembered what he did yesterday. Grinning, Naruto found a comfortable place to sit and wait for the spectacle.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Two hours later…

"Yo."

"YOU!" Sakura had spun around, about to yell at her late sensei when she caught sight of him. Even though Kakashi had tried washing his face and hair several time-even once going as far as bleaching it out of desperation-his hair still had spots of orange and pink, and several damp, errant feathers could be seen sticking out of the mess. His chunnin vest still had a slight chunk taken out of it near the bottom, making the edge on that side look tattered and unkempt. Topping it all though, was the variety of red dots showing on Kakashi's face. It was a silent scene; two faces showing shock and surprise, one of slight happiness with a tinge of malevolence, and one with a huge grin on his face, almost bisecting his head.

"AHAHAHAHA!" Naruto's laugh shattered the moment, leaving behind a very shocked Sakura, and a very unhappy Kakashi. Even Sasuke was snickering behind his hand, you could tell by the way his shoulders kept shaking slightly.

Eventually, Sakura found her ability to speak again, and asked, "Wha-what happened to you Kakashi-sensei?"

Sheepishly Kakashi scratched his head and said, "Eh? I was lost on the road of life?"

Scowling, Sakura saw that this had only redoubled Naruto's laughter and Sasuke's snickers, "Your hair is pink and orange and you have chicken pox, literally, because you were lost on the road of life?"

"Ehh…something like that." Coughing several times to get his student's attention, he waited until Sasuke's shoulders stopped shaking and his usual frown was in place and until Naruto's laughter died down to his normal levels of noise. Sakura's frown stayed in place though. "Now. We have a mission…"

"Yay! A mission!" Of course it was Naruto who called out, "So what are we going to do? Huh Kakashi-sensei? Protect a princess? Wipe out an invading army? C'mon, it has to be something impressive, otherwise my all time cool ninja skills will go to waste!"

Sasuke scowled at the noisy blonde, "You mean your nonexistent shinobi skills, dobe?"

In a flash, Naruto was grabbing Sasuke's collar and yelling into his calm face, "YOU WANT SKILLS? I"LL SHOW YOU SKILLS!"

"NARUTO! GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY SASUKE-KUN!" Stomping up to him, Sakura grabbed the back of his jacked and pulled him off Sasuke to yell into his face, "DON'T YOU EVER TOUCH MY SASUKE-KUN!"

Kakashi felt somewhat relieved that his kunoichi was no longer directing her anger at him, but rather at a fellow teammate, and somewhat disturbed since he was supposed to be teaching them teamwork. Taking a mental step back from the situation, and leaving his two students to fight it out, he quickly had a short mental battle over self-preservation of skin vs. pride and respect from a good team reputation, since he was a shinobi, his self-preservation side quickly won and tossed his pride right out the door. About then, Sasuke got tired of the quickly escalating argument and quietly asked, "So what's the mission?"

Immediately these words had a calming effect on his two supposed teammates, Sakura because she didn't want Sasuke to not like her for keeping him from the mission, and Naruto because he also wanted to know what it was.

"A D-rank mission, probably the best one they had too. We get to capture a dangerous felon…" Kakashi rambled on and on about how dangerous and exciting Team 7's first mission was. Sakura and Sasuke just looked dubious, while Naruto acted like he was drinking up all the words and actually believing them, he even fell silent for a while…

"…finally, the descriptions. He has striped red hair, is very fast, but wearing a collar with a bell on it, and he has a red ribbon tied behind his right ear." Satisfied with his mission delivery, he looked at his students quizzical faces, then acted like he forgot something, "Oh yeah, his name's Tora,"

"Tora?"

"Yep, Madame Shijimi's cat."

"WHAT!"…but not for very long. "YOU ME, A MOST EXCELLENT NINJA, TO SPEND MY TIME CATCHING CATS! LIKE HELL I WILL!"

At this, Kakashi's pent-up anger finally broke loose, "Listen you baka, all shinobis have to start with D-class missions. As your rank gets higher, you can take on the more dangerous missions, but in peacetime, genins like yourself have to spend their time doing low D-class missions, so get over it. Besides, to advance to the next level, you have to do a requisite number of a certain type of missions. In your case, you need at least twenty D-class before you can get to chuunin level.'

Grumbling, Naruto eventually accepted the fact that he was going to have to do boring D-class missions, though he wasn't very happy about it. _Damn it! I passed genin level months ago! Stupid low rank, low mission rule…_

As they neared the forest where Tora was last seen though, Naruto perked up a bit. _Hey, isn't that the apothecary's forest…cool, I can pick up a few herbs that I need for my poisons. And the old hag can't run me off either, cause I'm on shinobi duty. _

Sakura also recognized the forest, "Hey Kakashi-sensei?"

"Hm?"

"Isn't that forest off limits to everyone but the old lady that makes potions? Why would Tora be there?"

"First off, yes, normally it is, but I have special permission specifically from that old lady that allows us in, apparently she doesn't like cats poking around her herbs. And second, she mentioned a large field of catnip near the northwest area, I suggest that we start there. Anymore questions?"

"Nope."

"No."

"…"

"Great! Well off we go then! Team 7's first mission starts now!"

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Ninety minutes later…

"ARRGH!"

Kakashi looked up from his book and sighed, then he went to help Naruto out of a trap, again. Reaching the clearing, he saw Sakura and Sasuke already there, standing next to quite a large hole. Looking down, he saw Naruto in the middle of it, wincing and rubbing his backside. Sighing, he called down, "Oy Naruto! When will you stop falling into traps? I thought I told you to look out for them! The old lady who owns this forest is very paranoid, and set traps everywhere! And this is the sixteenth one!"

Making a pained face, Naruto called back up, "I know, I know! But I saw that blasted cat run right across this so I thought it was safe!"

Sakura yelled down, "Again! You've made that excuse so many times I've lost count! And besides, if Tora was seen by you, then me and Sasuke-kun would have seen and caught it already!"

About to make an angry retort, Naruto noticed something, then smirked and retorted, "So you think you and Sasuke-teme are better than I am at finding something that's hiding?"

"Damn right we are! And stop calling Sasuke-kun that!" Picking up a rock, Sakura threw it as hard as she could at Naruto's head.

Wincing, and rubbing two sore spots now, Naruto said, "So how about a bet? Me vs. you and Sasuke. Whichever team finds that cat first wins. Loser has to pay for the winner's ramen for a week!"

"Make it lunch instead!"

"Fine."

"Sasuke-kun?"

Sasuke just snorted and nodded his head, annoyed but intrigued by the deal.

"Sasuke-kun says yes! You're on!"

"Deal! Kakashi-sensei, you're the witness! You make sure that they pay when I get that damn cat!"

Surprised at the quick turn of events, Kakashi reluctantly nodded, but added, "What makes you so sure that you're going to win? If I recall, you're grades were pretty bad back in the Academy, and Sakura and Sasuke here were the top kunoichi and ninja in you class."

Smirking, Naruto said, "I'm the master prankster of Konoha! I've had plenty of practice hiding myself, I just have to think like a cat. Besides," Naruto pulled himself up, and pointed at the shrubs between Sakura and Sasuke and said sardonically, "the damn cat has been hiding in the bush behind you the whole time I've been in this damn hole!"

Surprised, all three shinobis jerked their heads up in surprise, and Sakura and Sasuke both made a leap at the bush, only to crash into each other and fall to the ground, moaning in pain. Said bush gave a yowl at the action, and a red blur raced for the safety of the forest, quickly followed by an orange and yellow one that leapt over Sakura's head and mocked, "I thought shinobis were supposed to look underneath the underneath. How're you going to do that when you can't find something under your nose?" and mocking laughter followed as both cat and annoying shinobi disappeared into the green safety of the forest.

Grimacing, Sasuke pulled himself off of Sakura and ran off into the forest, closely followed by an apologizing Sakura. Kakashi sweat dropped, _This could be more troublesome than I thought._

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto grinned as he followed the running cat, _Damn, it felt good to piss them off like that! I should really do it more often. _Reveling in his thoughts, he didn't notice when his prey suddenly made a sharp turn, and left Naruto to crash into a tree. "Ooof!" Groaning, Naruto shook his head slightly and looked around where he landed. Lots of vegetation, lots of shrubbery, but no movement, sighing, Naruto placed his hands into a cross seal, "Kage Bunshin no jutsu!" and created twenty clones. Smiling, Naruto sent his clones to check the bushes, and was immediately rewarded when a large yowl and a leaping cat emerged from one of the bushes. Racing after it, Naruto managed several near misses with tree branches and had to jump over some high roots several times, but eventually managed to catch it. Waiting for his kage bunshins to catch up, he started to think about what to do with the struggling animal, _Bloody cat, since it's the mission objective, I can't kill it, but I don't want to catch it again either, hmm, I wonder if sleep powder works on animals as well?_ When one of his bunshins reached him, Naruto directed him to his ninja pouch and had him pull out his tiny vial of sleeping powder, _Damn, stuff is so expensive! And I was gonna slip some in Kakashi-sensei's food too. Ah well, the sacrifices made for the sake of progress…_Forcing the cat's mouth open, he tapped in a small amount of powder into the cat's mouth, waiting the requisite two minutes, he found to his gratification that the animal's movements were already starting to seem sluggish. After another minute, the cat was deeply and soundly asleep, and he was looking around for more herbs to stuff into his pockets.

When his pockets were full, he started to stick plants into his ninja pouch, grinning every time he heard Sakura's and Sasuke's yells of frustration. Deciding to have some fun with them, he made two kage bunshins, had them find each of his teammates, then henge into a red cat and run around a bit. Grinning at one of his all time best pranks ever, Naruto finished picking the herbs, picked up Tora, and was about to start walking to the forest's entrance, when he got an incredibly evil idea…

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Sakura leapt after the red cat, all the while thinking, _Yes! I'm going to win the bet for our team! Then Sasuke-kun will finally like me! He might even ask me out on a date! Maybe he'd kiss me…_ Her head filled with thoughts of her dream boy, she never noticed that she was going towards the entrance.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Sasuke ran and dived after a red cat, ad missed as the animal unerringly decided to jump right then, "Kuso…"

Picking himself up, Sasuke felt nothing, nothing but cold rage at feeling so weak. _How the hell am I going to kill HIM, if I can't even catch a damn cat! _Breathing a little hard, Sasuke ran after the cat again, this time it was cleaning itself, but just when he was about to jump, it ran off again into the bushes, and Sasuke hit the dirt again. _That's it, extra training today, have to improve my speed. _He picked himself up and ran after the cat.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Kakashi was standing at the entrance, reading his Icha Icha Paradise book as usual, when he heard a rustling noise, looking up, he saw Naruto stride out of the bushes, a limp cat body under his arm. Mildly, Kakashi remarked, "You know Naruto, you were supposed to catch the cat, not kill it. Madame Shijimi won't be very pleased when her cat comes back in a body bag."

Waving his hand nonchalantly, Naruto replied, "Oh, its not dead, just sleeping. Can we go now? I want to collect on my bet with Sasuke-teme and Sakura-chan."

"We have to wait for your teammates before we can leave."

"Oh, they'll be here soon. Like right about…now."

Before Kakashi could ask how Naruto knew this, he saw two red cats dash out of a bush before they disappeared, and was very surprised when he saw both Sasuke and Sakura leapt over the bush, and crashed in midair for the second time that day. Looking over at Naruto, he saw the orange-clad boy grinning at the scene. Then, to rub salt into their wounds, Naruto strode over to the two entangled, moaning bodies, and squatted down before them. Holding the cat upright, he lifted up one limp paw and said, "Kitty says 'hi'."

At that moment, Kakashi felt quite a few conflicting emotions rush through him; anger, at Naruto having killed his teamwork mission, amusement, at the scene of both Sasuke and Sakura trying to lash out at Naruto, not even noticing the close proximity of the other, and slight depression, at the daunting task of having this 'team' actually work as a team.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto grinned at his memories of the day's morning. So far, he had played several pranks on Sasuke and Sakura, twice of which made them crash into each other, and with one memorable moment when they realized how close they were to each other, Sakura of course immediately grabbed Sasuke tighter while he finally showed some more emotions, such as panic. Afterwards, they brought the cat back, got paid, felt really sorry for the cat once it was back in Madam Shijimi's arms, then went off to eat lunch, or rather, Naruto immediately went to Icharaku's, ordered one bowl after another, and watched Sakura's amazed face as he racked up thirty bowls of ramen. Of course, that amazement quickly turned to fear as she realized the she and Sasuke were going to pay for all of this. Naruto could practically see the moment on her face when she calculated just how much this was going to cost for just today…and just how much was going to be left in her piggy bank at the end of the week. Sasuke just put on his expressionless mask, and silently paid before walking away, Kakashi had disappeared on them long before. Finally, as a very nice bonus, he was carrying on his person a whole bunch of herbs just begging to be distilled into poisons and ninja supplements. Yep, for Naruto, it was a very good day…until he remembered what happened that morning.

Quickly, his mood soured, and he even tried jumping in place a few times as hard as he could, to no avail, as all he managed was a few lowly inches. Trying a quick jutsu, Naruto found that even a simple kamiwari required vast amounts of chakra and control. His happiness ruined, Naruto stomped home, set his herbs to dry, and stomped out again, intent on the training grounds.

Once he reached Team 7's training ground, since there was no point using his own until he got back up to his previous strength, he was slightly surprised to find Sasuke there, running laps around the clearing. Staying hidden, Naruto watched as Sasuke went from laps, to quick sprints across the clearing, to pushups, to sit-ups, then back to laps. Silently, Naruto left his hiding place, and joined his teammate in laps. Sasuke glanced at Naruto slightly and raised his eyebrow, but didn't comment, and Naruto continued to follow Sasuke's example, matching him stride for stride, until they were both like synchronized machines. Naturally, Sasuke tried to push the pace somewhat so he would feel superior to Naruto, and Naruto let him, recognizing a slight comrade in race for acknowledgement, though he knew not what. Him with the villagers, him with his brother, and in thus, the rest of the afternoon passed away in silence

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto laid panting on the ground, tired from his afternoon workout, and calmly watching the slowly darkening sky. His teammate and workout partner had already left, both of them collapsing at the same time on the ground, but where Sasuke had got up and went home, Naruto stayed on the ground, thinking about what had happened to him. _Damn, damn, damn…What the hell is wrong with me today? No chakra control, so ninjutsu, no speed or agility, and barely any taijutsu skills left, not that I had that much in the first place. But still, WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO ALL MY SHINOBI SKILLS!_

**I sealed them, and could you stop yelling please? As amusing as your rants are, if the price is for them to wake me up from my sleep, I prefer you to not have them**

_YOU BASTARD FOX! GIVE ME BACK MY JUTSU!_

**You know, you remind me of a guy that I hate. He was obsessed with collecting jutsu, and if they were sealed, I think he would have come down here and tried to get his jutsu back himself.**

_That's not such a bad idea…_

_**Sucker…**_

****Naruto felt his consciousness recede into the far reaches of his head, and felt his body slip away, not a very uncommon feeling, but not entirely pleasant either. Once his eyes opened again, Naruto was standing in the middle of a very damp and dark hallway, somewhat like a sewer. Turning around the single corner, Naruto walked up to the giant cage that was the fox's seal, and shouted _NOW GET OUT HERE FOX, AND GIVE ME BACK MY SHINOBI SKILLS!_

Slowly, and majestically, the nine-tailed Kyubbi walked out of the darkness at the back of the cage, lied down on the floor and placed his head on his paws, staring down at Naruto's diminutive figure**. You know kit, some redecorating could do this place good. I was thinking of maybe something involving lots of red, lots of fire, maybe an Inferni or two…who knows, I might even bring back the smell of brimstone.**

_THIS IS NO TIME FOR REDECORATION! WHERE THE HELL ARE MY SHINOBI SKILLS!_

**Calm down kit, you're giving me a headache.**

_CALM DOWN! YOU WANT ME TO CALM DOWN! WHY YOU…_

About here, the Kyubbi had had enough with the pleasantries, and shouted**, SHUT UP! **

Cowed, Naruto did so. Calm again, the Kyubbi said, **Now, I want you to concentrate chakra to your left hand. Don't ask why, just do so.**

Puzzled, Naruto did as he asked, and saw nothing. _Yeah? Now what?_

**It's on the back of your hand.**

Turning his hand over, Naruto was fairly surprised at the strange looking seal that he knew wasn't there a few minutes ago. Answering Naruto's unspoken question, the Kyubbi replied, **It's a training seal. A _demon _training seal, so please don't mess around with it. **

_What's it do?_

**Three things. One, it will scramble your chakra flow, sort of what I did during your graduation exam, but on a regular basis, it's supposed to help you increase your chakra control. Second, those ten symbols you see outside the circle are demon numbers, zero through nine, and they're controlled by the shorter hand. They control how much gravity will interact with you, for instance, its currently set to two, so now, you weigh twice as much as you usually do. The zero is just a failsafe, incase you fall into deep water or something, and you need to get out fast, might also have useful battle properties. Dunno, never used it in battle…**

The Kyubbi's voice trailed off as he remembered past battles, and Naruto waited patiently. Eventually, he stopped waiting and asked, _And the third?_

**Huh? Oh. Now this is my personal invention, and it might or might not work, depending on the circumstances. It's supposed to low down your nerve responses, in other words, its supposed to train your reflexes and muscles. The faster your mind can react, the faster you will react, but eventually you'll reach a wall where it's impossible for you to go any further. As some of the things I'll be teaching you are pretty dangerous, you're gonna need fast reflexes and even faster legs to survive. For now it's off, since you don't have even basic responses to danger.**

_Hey!_

**Sorry kit, it's the truth. Alright, two more things. I used my chakra to make the seal, but both ours to adjust it, so you won't be able to change it at will. When I have deemed you ready, you'll go to the next level automatically. Hee hee, I'll change it when you're sleeping as a nice surprise for the morning.**

_Bastard fox…Wait. What if I'm in a fight? Extra weight won't be very helpful then._

**True. If it's a real fight, and only a real fight, not a training one, then you can release the seal in a hurry. Just smear your blood across the seal and it'll automatically deactivate. Is that it…yeah. That's it. Enjoy kit. **Here, the Kyubbi released a great wave of his chakra, forcing Naruto back into consciousness.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Groaning, Naruto returned to consciousness. Blinking and staring at the sky for a while, Naruto slowly got up, and trudged off to his house. As he walked, Naruto stared off into space. _So, a new training device huh? Bloody fox, making my life harder than it already is…_

When he got home, Naruto silently attempted to make a few kage bunshins, forgetting about the seal, and predictably failed. Making a face, he started grumbling and started to grind up some of his fresher herbs into a paste in his kitchen. Pulling open a drawer, he looked at the rolls of scrolls and silently mumbled to himself as he ran his finger along the titles, "Lemme see…_100 New Recipes…Fast Cooking…Meals of Death…Ramen in Two Minutes!_ Hey, I've been looking for that…_Slim Eating. _Ah! Here it is! Shinobi Poisons." Making space on the counter, Naruto quickly scanned the instructions for the first poison, and grinned grimly. _Perfect, nerve drug. 'Places enemy at your mercy for several hours' huh? Fast-acting too. Thank you Kami for this find! _Naruto grinned and spent the next three hours trying to finish his concoction.

When he was done, Naruto looked slightly downcast, but still triumphant. The viscous liquid looked a shade off than the color described, but still looked potent. Covering the jar, Naruto placed it in his refrigerator, then reached for his milk and started drinking. _Aw. Out already? Crap. I'm gonna have to stop by the store tomorrow…_Placing the water on boil, Naruto absently licked his finger before peeling open his ramen. Almost instantly, Naruto felt his body stiffen up, and gave an inward grin of satisfaction. _Alright! It works! Before it's finished curing too…oh…wait…CRAP! The scroll it would last for hours! IM HUNGRY! DAMN! DAMN! DAMN!_

**You know kit, I really don't appreciate you waking me up like this every time. Any chance I could ask for a gentle shake instead? **Sighing as Naruto let loose a particularly long and explicit stream of curses, he said resignedly, **No…didn't think you would. And why are you complaining for anyway? Thanks to me, you're immune to most deadly poisons, and those that do affect you shouldn't last more than a few minutes. Try moving. **Naruto did so, and found with relief that he could move again, although with slightly less coordination and grace than usual. Wobbling to the sink, he washed his hands thoroughly and started undressing while he was waiting for the water to boil. When he took off his belt though, his scroll tumbled out.

"Eh? Oh, its this useless scroll."

**Hold on kit, what's it on?**

_Just an unsealing jutsu. Should have realized that Forbidden Seals meant these as well…_

**Unsealing? You sure? **Naruto could pickup faint traces of excitement in the Kyubbi's voice.

_Yeah. An extremely complicated one, requiring lots of prerequisite conditions. And a shorter version, five-something. _

**Kit. I'm going to give you a direct order, and I expect you to follow it to the letter, ok? Here goes…learn them, both of them.**

_Huh? Why? They're pretty useless, and they both require incredibly precise chakra control! The short one I might get with a _lot _of work, but I might as well become a medic-nin before I'll be able to perform the long version, which you know is almost impossible for me, with you messing up my chakra system._

**Fine, learn the short hand for now then, but don't get rid of that scroll. If it's strong enough, you might be able to let my consciousness out of here for a while. **

…_hmm, I can see where you're going with that, but why the other one?_

**Kit…I could go on all night about various sealing techniques and their layered effects…but for now, just knowing that I told you to learn it should be enough for you. **

Grumbling slightly, Naruto heard the kettle whistling and started to run for the kitchen…when he promptly tripped on his own pants. Hearing the Kyubbi laughing about it didn't make it better while Naruto limped into the kitchen, and ate his dinner.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

One week later…

The dreaded alarm clock rang…and Naruto's hand shot up to grab it. Groaning slightly, Naruto peered up at the clock, the buried his face back into the pillow.

Fifteen minutes later, Naruto was being carried into the bathroom by two kage bunshins, and being ungracefully placed under the shower head and having the water turned on cold full blast.

Later, Naruto would have sworn that the entire village had heard his scream. Certainly the birds nearby had, if the cloud of feathered beings was anything to go by. By the time he got to the bridge, he was thoroughly pissed off, at everything in general, and Kakashi in particular. Not even greeting Sakura, and especially not noticing Sasuke, Naruto sat down against one of the pillars and started stewing in his own anger. _Bloody bastard makes us come at six, then doesn't show up till nine! Man, I want to get him! _Brooding silently, Naruto started to review his past week. So far, nothing much of interest had happened, most days went like this, waking up early, waiting several hours, then doing a D-rank mission, eating lunch, making Sasuke pay up-whether or not it was part of his 'mask' Naruto genuinely hated him-then another few D-rank missions or just general lessons in teamwork. At first, Naruto was grateful for the extra missions, since it meant extra money for bills, and eventually pocket money, but after doing over a dozen boring, menial D-rank missions, Naruto was ready to punch the living daylights out of the next person who mentioned it. Unfortunately, the next person was likely to be his teacher, not to mention the fact that he still had to fight that old lady later this afternoon. All in all, it looked to be a pretty bad day coming up, "DAMN YOU KAKASHI-SENSEI!"

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Four hours later…

"Yo."

"YOU"RE LATE!" Even though this was Naruto's and Sakura's usual greeting, Kakashi was slightly taken aback with the new level of menace. Even Sasuke was showing his anger, with a pulsing tic mark throbbing on his forehead. Desperately, he reached deep into his sac of lies and pulled one out at random, "Sorry, sorry. Kurenai was critically hospitalized and I had to bring her fresh rats." In retrospect, even Kakashi was mentally beating the crap out of himself.

Crossing his arms and talking coldly, so low as to almost physically lower the temperature, Naruto said, "Kurenai-sensei. Kurenai-sensei of team 8? Hinata, Kiba, and Shino?"

"Um, yes?"

"The Kurenai-sensei that just came around that corner?" Voice dripping with sarcasm, Naruto lifted one of his hands and pointed down the street where Kakashi had just came from. Kakashi turned his head to look and sweat dropped, as he saw that Naruto had indeed spoke the truth. Turning around, he saw three identical faces of disgust, and tried to save some face, "Eheheh…" sheepishly Kakashi scratched the back of his head, which only served to provoke the three even more, and suddenly there were three _very _frightening killing intents in front of Kakashi.

Suddenly brightening up, he said, "Well, you'll be pleased to hear that we got a mission!" The tension relaxed slightly as all three showed signs of interest.

"I know it's only a regular D-rank…" The desire to destroy something redoubled, as Naruto and Sakura slowly approached, almost dreamily, hands held out as if to throttle an invisible neck. And while Sasuke didn't take a single step, he looked as if he was seriously considering cremating Kakashi's mortal remains; so eager to do so that he wasn't even going to wait till he was dead before he used a Goukakyuu no jutsu on his body.

"But…umm…it could turn A-rank?…" That statement startled Team seven enough for Kakashi to lead them away from possible sudden death.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"So let me get this straight," Sakura began in a completely deadpan voice, "You want us to go into the bathhouse and replace the old stools and cleaning materials with new stools and cleaning materials."

Kakashi nodded, and added, "In three minutes."

Finally, Naruto couldn't take anymore and yelled, "THAT'S A DAMN D-RANK MISSION!"

Sasuke muttered to himself, "No way it's that easy…"

Slapping Sasuke heartily on the back, Kakashi said cheerfully, "Sasuke is quite right! You each have to go into the side of your opposite gender!"

There was a collective yell of, "WHAT?" before all three genins started making vehement denials, plotting matters of revenge…generally all-round mutiny actions, with each of them agreeing with each other that their teacher had finally crossed the line.

Said teacher was watching the proceedings and finally gave it up, "Fine, fine…meet me back at the bridge."

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"Congratulations, team seven has failed its first mission!" The jounin-instructor's words greeted them as they reached the bridge.

Folding her arms, Sakura frowned, "It was an unreasonable mission." Naruto and Sasuke both nodded accordingly, though both were displeased at messing up their perfect mission record.

Though secretly pleased that he had managed to avoid a beating, Kakashi set his voice to stern and addressed his students, "So, what have we learned today?"

Sasuke said, "A late teacher is untrustable." Normally, he would have just kept his silence, but he just didn't care at the moment.

Sakura replied, "A late teacher is a perverted teacher!" She was really disgusted at the mission even before her instructor's instructions, throwing those in just made it _wrong._

Naruto yelled, "And a perverted teacher tries to turn his students into perverts!" Naruto was just past caring about what the others thought about him, even though he was fairly mature, and had had the _talk_ with Kyubbi a long time ago, he was still annoyed at the perverted nature of is new mission.

Sweat dropping at the answers he received, Kakashi decided that he should give his students a lesson from the real world.

"Well, if you guys want to continue in your careers as ninjas, there will be times when you have to do unsavory things." That caught his student's attention.

"It's not all about rescuing people or guarding a person or taking out traitors…" Kakashi's eye glazed over slightly, this was starting to bring up some old, unwanted memories. "This is especially obvious with ANBU, and even with just jounin work."

Kakashi pointed at Naruto, "Naruto, you're goal is to become Hokage, right? Well, it'll be a long and hard road if you're aiming that far, and along that road is the jounin stage, when you might be asked to do unsavory missions." Holding his hands to his sides, Kakashi continued, "A client might ask us to kill a specific person, or even take out a rival business. These people could be working to restore poor countries, or donating funds from their business to help others, or for any other various reasons that benefit the less fortunate."

Closing his eye, Kakashi gave his students the advice they would always remember, "And we'll kill them, because we're paid to." His student's eye's widened, "That's how life works, its all a big gamble, and it all starts out with the hand you're dealt. Some people are given everything for their entire lives, and others have had everything taken away from them..." Here, both Sasuke and Naruto looked away slightly, "The Leaf can't afford to show weakness to the other Hidden villages, and usually the money we're paid goes to pay for damages we incur on an everyday basis. Training dummies, targets, landscaping the training fields, better facilities, property damage ranging from stray jutsus to everyday rooftop hopping…"

Sakura gasped, "That's horrible."

Sasuke turned his head sharply and shot back, "Its life. Our way of life, and the money we need has to come from somewhere. Look around you," Sasuke gestured with his arms, "All this beauty…all this peace…was bought with the money earned from those missions."

Kakashi nodded, it seemed that his student genius was the first to sensibly accept it. Sasuke continued, "We take jobs because we're assigned them and because we're paid heavily for them…"

"Sasuke, shut up." Naruto's quiet command caused everybody to look at him. Raising his head, unshed tears could be seen in his eyes, "So, we pay for our way of life with money steeped in the blood of others…"

Naruto turned and gave an ironic bow to Sasuke, "You were right Sasuke, I'm sorry." Sasuke was slightly taken aback, Naruto had never sincerely apologized to him, not even for a joke.

Naruto turned around and stared out over the bridge, and continued his speech, sounding as if he was far, far away somewhere, anywhere but the bridge he was standing on, "This truly is the shinobi's way of life. Soaked in blood, leaving nothing but a corpse and broken lives…to become a shadow in the darkness, and leave destruction in your wake…" Naruto suddenly whirled around with that gleam in his eyes, fist raised, "Which is why when I become the Hokage, I'll change all that!"

His audience blinked, and managed to share a blank stare, to which Naruto was completely oblivious to as he rambled on about how he was going to change the Leaf.

"BAKA!" Sakura screamed as she punched him into the river.

"Being a ninja requires a lot of money, dobe," Sasuke stated, he had long ago accepted the bloody life of a ninja, "Where are you going to get that money?"

"Ha!" Naruto shook his fist defiantly at Sasuke, though the effect was ruined with him standing soaked, waist-deep in a river, and looking up six-feet at his rival's face. "When I become Hokage, I'll turn Konoha into the strongest Hidden Village there is, and we'll never have to worry about something like that ever again!"

Kakashi smiled inwardly, they were just words and wishes. Words were words and wishes were wishes, but…somewhere Kakashi got the feeling that if Naruto said that wishes were fishes and money would grow from trees, Kakashi had better start wishing for his dinner and bring farming tools.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Team 7 was standing back in front of the same bathhouse. Naruto strode forward, "Alright! Let's do this mission, and do it right!" Kakashi was the only applauding among Sasuke's grumbles and Sakura's muttered dissents.

Sakura whirled around just before they were about to go in, "Kakashi-sensei, could you at least change the parameters of the mission?" She was still uncomfortable with the original objectives he set.

Both Sasuke and Naruto looked on in anticipation, the kind where you know it's going to turn out bad but there's always that _small _chance that it won't. Kakashi 'hemmed' and 'hawwed' and rubbed his chin for a good minute. On the one hand, this would be a good lesson for his students to learn, on the other hand, his student's fervent stares were really starting to creep him out.

"Fine." Kakashi paused, and watched as his students' expectation's rose, "_One_ person is allowed to enter the bath of their gender at a time…" and watched as they fell again, "You still have to replace the bathing things and the stools in the changing room, and you better do it fast since it's two minutes now." Kakashi could almost hear their moods hit the floor. Shrugging, he finished off, "Do whatever else you want."

Pulling out his book, he started reading again. Sakura turned to her teammates and muttered, "So…we can't wait till it closes, or until it's reliably empty…damn."

Naruto added in a forlorn voice, "And two of us still have to go to the opposite rooms…"

"Only one of us can save face, "Sasuke finished, then his eyes narrowed, "since we can't have only one of us go in there and change everything. We'd waste time and we have little enough of it as it is."

Sakura admitted, "Well, it can't be me, since I'm the only girl and if I went to the female side, then both of you would have to go to the male side, and we'd fail. Even if Sasuke came with me, we'd still fail since we have two people in the baths of their genders."

Sasuke smirked, then spun around on his heel and walked nonchalantly towards an entrance. It was only after he went inside that they realized he went into the males' side.

"Dammit!" Naruto punched a wall in anger, having realized that he would have to enter the female side.

Kakashi and Sakura winced slightly, even though they expected something like this to happen.

All prim and proper, Sakura remarked, "Rule 14, A ninja must always be ready to face the unexpected, whether he wants to or not."

Naruto sighed, then grinned slightly as his head came back up, "Well, be sure to remember that on you way in." Grinning his head off, as Sakura winced slightly and started walking, Naruto gave a jaunty wave and strode into the female side, silently seething. _DAMN HIM! DAMN THIS MISSION! I'M GONNA GET YOU FOR THIS KAKASHI-SENSEI!_

It wasn't long until the sounds of female screaming had started up.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Hearing the screams, Sakura shook her head. Unlike Naruto, she had used henge right before entering, and didn't draw too much attention to herself. All she had to do now was to stop herself from blushing too much and stick to Sasuke without getting too close to the other men.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Sasuke also heard the screams, but he smirked slightly instead. Frankly, he had expected his teammate to do something like that. His amusement didn't last too long however, his discomfort level rose. Sure he was on the males' side, but he didn't think he needed henge, and Sakura was standing too close for comfort. Normally this would have just been tolerated with a stone face and a blank glare, but since Sakura looked male at the moment, the pair of them was starting to get some very weird stares. Sasuke could only pray to whatever god hadn't forsaken him not to let Sakura shout out her love for him at such a time.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Kakashi's head rose slightly from his book as the screams started, but then he shook his head. He was slightly disappointed, but he had honestly expected something like this from the boy, and he also reasoned that if Naruto were any better at tactics, as he should be, he wouldn't have to go and embarrass himself like that.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Only a short time had passed before Sakura and Sasuke emerged from the men's side, amid a few hoots and catcalls, both of them collapsed on the ground, blushing furiously. Sasuke groaned slightly, then placed his face in his hands, and stayed like that. Sakura just blushed even more as she tried to get rid of the images of anatomy that seemed to be imprinted on her retinas. Suddenly, something occurred to her, and she stared up at Kakashi, "So, how did it go?"

Slightly annoyed at having been interrupted from his reading, yet slightly curious as to the meaning of the question, he said, "Um…Naruto's not done yet."

Waving her hand impatiently, Sakura said, "Oh I can see that…I meant the women that were…um, 'displeased' with how your mission was set up.

Kakashi gave a blank stare as his mind processed this new suggestion. _Huh? I never thought of that, and he's been at least a minute since the screams…soooo, say that if the x variable of the cloth weight, and there's a two percent chance of dropping…_his mind rambled on like that as he worked out probabilities and formulae for the amount of time an angry woman needs to dress. His mind quickly came to the conclusion: fast, very fast, and with time to spare.

So there was nothing wrong with his mission.

Which meant that something was definitely wrong.

Before Kakashi could act on this new information, or his mind could think of ways to act on the situation, Naruto walked out of the female side, cheerfully dusting his hands, "Hehehe."

Kakashi's mind feverishly wracked his minds for an explanation. _Naruto is a young boy of twelve. If he got caught, he probably could have explained what happened and gotten out of there in one piece, maybe. But the fact that the fox is inside him would probably work against him, and like Sakura mentioned, I still haven't seen any angry females…_ He nervously asked, "Um, Naruto, I almost hate to ask…but how did you go about your tasks?"

Naruto closed his eyes, grinned and gave a thumbs up, "I looked underneath the underneath, and I had someone help me!" he proudly stated.

And with those words, he promptly used Henge to change his image.

Kakashi stared, the person in front of him looked exactly like him. Down to his facemask and hitai-ate covering his left eye. The only difference was, the Kakashi in front of him had a towel around his waist. This Kakashi raised a hand in greeting while using the other to keep his towel up.

"Yo."

Sakura broke into giggles. Sasuke couldn't help but crack a smile as well. Both of them knew that whatever was coming, it was because their perverted teacher really deserved it.

Kakashi sweat dropped. He had always trusted his gut instinct, and every nerve in him was screaming at him to run.

"And just how did you receive help imitating me…"

"Easy! I went in as you and got everybody real angry, but someone realized I couldn't be you, and told everyone to calm down. Then she took me out and I told her about your training and she decided to help me out!"

"Oh?"

"Yeah! She should be on her way out now."

And out stepped Kurenai. Never before in Kakashi's entire career as a ninja did he really feel the need for the preservation of his skin clashing with the absolution to get what's coming to him as running would _definitely_ make it worse.

"Hello Kakashi." The greeting was given with a transparent smile and the voice was filled with malice.

Kakashi stammered, "Uh…h-hi K-kurenai-san."

"You have a peculiar method of training your students she remarked off-handedly, without a glance at said students.

"Err, I tried to make today's mission less ordinary by turning it into a little espionage mission. You know, a little teamwork, an explanation of the real-world kind of things…" Kakashi's voice trailed off as Kurenai seemed to gloom over him ominously, and his genius thinking warred with survival instincts reserved for indignant women. Looking around frantically, he saw that he wasn't going to receive any help soon from his students, if their wicked grins and gleaming eyes were anything to go by. Looking backup at Kurenai, whom was now cracking her knuckles, survival instincts won, and he backed up into a corner and took a fetal position. "Please don't hurt me."

Kurenai gave a dry laugh, her eyes gleamed in the bright sunlight "Oh I won't…much."

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"So what have we learned from all this?" Kakashi asked his students.

"Guys shouldn't enter the women's side of baths." Sasuke said with conviction.

"Sometimes a ninja has to get their hands dirty." Sakura added, then muttered, "Especially if they want to pound perverts."

Naruto stated sagely, "Guys should never piss off Kurenai-sensei." His eyes were closed and he nodded his head slowly and solemnly.

Kakashi sighed from the confines of his hospital bed. Both his legs were in casts and suspended, along with his left arm. He was also covered almost head to toe with bandages, with quite a few wrapped between his lower torso and his legs.

"Did you learn something today, Kakashi-sensei?" Sakura asked.

"That I well never try to make D-rank missions more interesting for my students." The hospitalized jounin replied glumly.

Naruto grinned, Sasuke smirked, and Sakura giggled, and their instructor set about dismissing them. Before they were out the door though, he called to their backs, "Just don't forget our lesson today," Kakashi reiterated, "Sometimes a ninja must do what they don't want to do. We don't have to like it, but it's a mission and we must try to finish it to the best of our abilities."

Waving his lone hand in dismissal, Team 7 got a brief glimpse of an orange book as the door closed, then heard perverted giggling emanating from the room.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

A/N: Well that's it. I might make some changes to this chapter, depending on how the true author of this scene reacts, but that's it. Sorry for the long wait.

Oh, If you don't at least recognize this…then you've missed out, I'm sorry, but that's the truth. If you do, but you don't remember the author, or at least what the story title was…I should flame you for such blasphemy! Naw, anyway, the guy's name is Arkhe, and the story is Fox Identity, the scene is in the fourth chapter, Testing Waters or something like that, around the middle. And for those of you who think I'm plagiarizing, let me lay the lines down, I asked specifically for that scene, I got permission to do so, and I changed some parts of it. _Comprende?_ Good, just so we're clear on where we stand. And essentially…I'm asking, NO FLAMES! Thanks.


	12. Proving Grounds

A/N: I'm going to keep this short and simple. Read. Enjoy. Review.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

As the afternoon wore on, Naruto was starting to get more and more nervous about his up coming battle. Even after changing his clothes into something more suited for battle, he still felt like he was gambling with fate. _Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap…that old lady's gonna kill me! I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die…_

**Kit…shut up. Your whining is really annoying me. **

_WHY SHOULD I! THAT OLD HAG'S GONNA SLAUGHTER ME!_

**Nah, maybe only rough you up a bit.**

_SHE'S EX-ANBU! I'M STILL GONNA GET MY ASS KICKED ROYALLY! AND THIS IS ALL BECAUSE OF YOUR STUPID SEAL!_

**So? Just adjust it.**

_Huh? I can do that?_

**Uh…yeah. How else did you think I was gonna make your body heavier?**

_Oh yeah…_

**Uh huh…Anyway, just concentrate some of your chakra into one of your right fingers, doesn't matter which one, and I'll take over from there.**

_Uh, alright. _Naruto did as he was asked, and was slightly surprised when red chakra surrounded his right hand. _Hey, what're gonna do with my hand!_

**Shut up kit. Just watch the master at work. **The Kyubbi moved his hand over the other, then used his finger to gently touch the 'hour' hand, and shifted his finger, and, to Naruto's surprise, dragged the hand along with it. Setting it back at normal, the Kyubbi's chakra faded away, leaving Naruto standing the middle of the street.

Immediately, he ran a short distance, and was gratified to find that his former speed had returned. Jumping as hard as he could, Naruto grinned as he soared into the air, landing on the wall, he started running up it, then started roof jumping just for the sheer joy of it.

_HELL YEAH!_

**Kit, shut up before I kill you.**

_Ah, but you can't! HA!_

**Fine, I'll do cruel and unusual things to you.**

_Um, don't, please?_

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Walking up to training field twenty-five, Ling and Kaori were slightly surprised to see Naruto already there, getting in a workout. Shrugging, Ling brushed aside his surprise and called out, "Yo, Naruto!"

"Hm?" Naruto turned and saw the couple entering the field. Stopping, he raised his arm and started waving, "Hey! Ling! Kaori! Where's the baa-chan?"

"The 'baa-chan' is currently behind you." Startled, Naruto tried to quickly turn around, but tripped and fell. Rubbing the back of his head, he looked up…and started sweating at the scary face that Tsubaki was making.

Cracking her knuckles, and wearing and ominous face, she intoned angrily, "What did you call me?"

"Heh heh…WAAAAGH!" Naruto suddenly took off at a dead run, with the old, but still sprightly, tailor quickly following in his footsteps.

After several laps, Tsubaki suddenly slowed down, gasping for breath, "Yo. Could you give me a while to rest before we start our match? My body isn't as young as it once was."

"Eh? Um…ok." _He he! She's tired already? This is gonna be a snap!_

_**He's dead…**_

Tsubaki sat down, still breathing quite heavily. Suddenly she stopped gasping and stood up straight, a small smile on her face, "Alright, I'm done. Let's begin shall we?" Without any warning she started charging towards the surprised Naruto, kunai drawn

"Whoa! Wait! Crap! Crap!" Naruto was having obvious difficulty trying to dodge the slashes the ex-ANBU made. Making a decision, and wincing at the sacrifice, he suddenly stopped jumping backwards and leaped through the slicing blades instead, towards the startled face of Tsubaki.

Landing about ten feet behind the old medic, he winced as cuts and rips from the kunai started appearing all over his body. Knowing that they would heal quickly though, did much to alleviate the worry he had. Looking back at his opponent, he saw the she had stopped moving and was watching him with a calculating stare.

Abruptly she grinned, and half-heartedly tossed both kunai at Naruto before performing a few quick seals and settling into the basic taijutsu stance they taught at the Academy. Grinning, she called out, "Well, look's like I better take this a bit more seriously, eh? Let's knock this up a notch or three."

Naruto just moved out of the way of the thrown kunai, condensation rising from the various cuts as they started to heal. Cautiously, he settled into his default brawler stance, sizing up his enigmatic opponent and trying for the life of him to remember where he had seen those seals before

Flashing a grin, Tsubaki rapidly closed the distance between the two shinobis, stopping Naruto's thought track as he scrambled to react to the attack. He settled for shifting his weight a little, settling into a defensive stance. His whole stance crumbled, however, when the older and much more experienced medic-nin merely hit a glancing blow to his left arm, causing it to suddenly fall limp. Stunned at the outcome of events, Naruto retreated again as he tried to find the problem. Shaking and flapping his arm, he cried out indignantly, "Oy! What did you do to me?"

Grinning in a manner that belied her age, she replied by holding up a hand and allowing the chakra that was being controlled to show, "Chakra Enjintou."

Nodding his head, Naruto grimaced, "…damn it. You used that jutsu last week to cut the cloth, right?"

Impressed that he had remembered such a small detail, Tsubaki replied, "Yep. Only I made sure to control my chakra so that it doesn't show." Staring at her hand, she turned it back and forth, admiring the sight as the chakra twisted this way and that to her command, "Funny. It's a medical ninjutsu, but there's really relatively very little control needed for this jutsu, unlike most other medical jutsu" she grinned as she looked at Naruto's captivated state, "I've heard that you have horrible chakra control, maybe you'll be able to pull it off…if you win that is."

Shaking himself out of the dreams of such a useful jutsu, Naruto grinned as he started to rush forward, then frowned as his arm flapped uselessly by his side. Trying to move it, he started smiling again as he felt his fingers twitch slightly. _Accelerated healing factor, gotta love it. _Looking up, he saw that the old shinobi had suddenly, and drastically decreased the distance between the two of them, chakra-empowered hands ready to do more damage. Surprised, and extremely annoyed, he tried to evade the hands, as even one touch would require time to repair it. Finally, after being hit several times, Naruto got tired and decided to try something else. Reaching into his pouch, he grabbed a handful of homemade explosive tags and bombs, waited until the other ninja was in the middle of a leap, and threw them on the ground in front of him before jumping to safety.

Looking at the small, smoking, and most important, rapidly approaching, pile of paper, her mind told her body to stop moving, but said body was currently flying through the air, and last time she checked, gravity still worked, "Aw damn…"

The explosion ripped forth with surprising consequences. A multi-colored explosion took place where the tags had once been, at once freezing, shocking, burning, blinding, and deafening the opponent. Hidden away in a tree and nursing his wounds, Naruto's eyes' widened at the sight. Grinning, he filed away the interesting reaction and resolved to test it some more later on. At the sight of a silhouette in the smoke though, his mind immediately went back to battle mode, analyzing and evaluating the enemy's condition, and trying to apply those potential weaknesses to possible attack strategies. Or at least, thinking whether throwing jutsu after jutsu would work on her.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

_Dammit! _Tsubaki groaned as she took a quick survey of her status. Her left arm and leg was slightly frozen, her right arm and leg were somewhat charred. She had lost a lot of her hearing and sight, and to top it off, her body still wasn't working properly. _Blasted shock tags. Where did he get those anyway…_

With much difficulty, she raised her arms to perform the seals for a medical jutsu. _Chiyute no Jutsu. _Raising the ball of green chakra, she applied quickly to both her arms, and then started on her legs. She would have finished too if it weren't for the sudden barrage of kunai. Most of them struck, and Naruto had a brief moment of glee before the impaled person was replaced with an impaled log…with a flash bomb attached.

This time, Tsubaki was the one grinning as she heard the explosion. With any luck, the blond shinobi would be too blinded to continue his assault for a while, and she could have time to recover. Sighing slightly, she leaned against the tree, and waited for her senses to clear, and the feeling to come back to her limbs.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

_Damn, damn, damn. _Naruto moaned as he rubbed his eyes frantically, trying, and failing, to get some of his sight back. Finding his efforts dismal and ineffective, he resigned himself to thinking. _Alright, lemme see…the old lady is probably as blind as I am right now, and deaf to boot, so this would be the perfect time to attack! Now if only I weren't blind as well…dammit! A perfect chance to attack and its wasted cause I can't bloody see! Wait a minute…_

"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" Unfortunately for Naruto, he forgot that Kage Bunshin replicated the user _flawlessly, _which meant that they were afflicted by the same things as him. As a result, the clone promptly took a step…and fell to its demise on the forest floor. Naruto cursed, then pulled out the items he needed and started working on his backup plan.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Snapping open her eyes, Tsubaki pulled herself to her feet, then disappeared, a slightly shaking twig the only evidence that she was there at all.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Elsewhere, Naruto was just done cleaning up after himself when he felt, rather than heard the shruiken that flew towards him, and grinned to himself. After the Kawarimi, he contented himself to run away, preferring a spot where he could use his new weapons more effectively.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Tsubaki growled to herself. _Blasted brat! All this running around and nothing to show for it. And I'm not as young as I once was. _All of a sudden she gave a wicked grin, _oh, he is going to HURT after this…_

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Bounding from tree to tree, said orange-clad genin gave a slight shiver. _Old hag must be cooking up something nasty for me._ A small grin worked its way across his face as he contemplated what he was going to do in retaliation.

As the medic nin came into sight, he stopped short. She was standing in the middle of a clearing, with plenty of empty space around her. Naruto was slightly nonplussed as to attack her without revealing his position, until…

"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu." A score of clones popped into existence, and the real Naruto was left panting on the branch he was standing on, silently cursing the training seal with all the profanity he knows…and some that he made up on the spot. In his place at the back of Naruto's mind, the Kyubbi took note of them. _**Hm, there's a good one…and that one…and, oh, isn't that physically impossible? **_He pauses for a moment to think, _**Well, for a human anyway…**_

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Tsubaki stood straight, eyes closed and muscles tense. A slight whistling in the air, and she was moving, dancing lightly as she dodged the flying pieces of metal. A crackling sound, and she calmly, methodically, performed the seals for a jutsu. Slamming her hands on the ground, she calmly stated, as if informing a curious watcher, "Doton: Doroku Gaeshi (Mud Wall)"

The earth rose up in answer to her summons, and the exploding tags did what they were meant to do: explode. However, when the wall crumbled back into dirt, she strode out, apparently unharmed, and eyes open, ready for combat.

Naruto sensed the change, and readied himself for one last fight. Slipping his hands into his pouch, he pulled out a brace of slightly glistening kunai, and leapt off his branch. The various bunshins hidden around the clearing followed suit, and started a barrage of steel.

Tsubaki silently cursed her aged and wizened body; even if countless battles worth of experience was on her side, if her body couldn't keep up, it was all wasted. And if she kept using Kawarimi, her stamina and chakra would eventually be depleted and he would catch up. She had to end this now! Gritting her teeth, she closed her eyes, and started to dance.

Naruto watched, entranced, as the old medic nin literally _danced _around the flying metal. If one looked closely, the sparkle of the sun on the edges of the metal gave her an entrancing aura, like a woman dancing among fireflies. It was magnificent, it was beautiful, and Naruto being Naruto, instantly fell in love with the technique. He engrained the scene into his mind forever. Then the moment was over.

Naruto landed lightly on his feet as Tsubaki came to a stop with a final whirl, and then slumped over in exhaustion. The young genin looked on impassively as the old jounin caught her breath. When she did, she smirked slightly and pulled out a familiar looking pill… She felt the energy course through her veins and settled into a familiar stance. The genin responded in kind, holding a kunai in either hand. There was a charge, a quick exchange of blows, and then…a stalemate.

Both opponents stared at each other. One of them was sprawled out on the ground, bruises on his arms and legs, denoting where a hand charged with a Chakra Enjintou had cut his muscles. The other was frozen where she stood, a cut cheek being the only new wound she sported, aside from the paralyzing venom coursing through her veins. Naruto gave a weak fox grin before passing out from exhaustion.

Seeing that the boy was out cold, Ling suddenly seemed to materialize from the forest shadows. Striding across the weapon-strewn clearing to his mother as if it were an everyday thing, he quietly stood a few feet away from the pair. "So…how was he?" Mirth leaked through his calm demeanor.

Tsubaki couldn't move a single muscle, even though, her eyes expressed her delight at such a fun fight. Ling cracked a small grin, "That good huh?" Using his chakra, he pulled up some of the earth into a small mound to sit on. At his mother's questioning glance, he chuckled and said, "Kaori's not as fast as she was a few months ago, and she knows the medic-nin stuff, unlike me. As you know, I was just a regular shinobi, so for now, you're stuck in that position."

Glare.

Ling chuckled some more as he started binding the various cuts and scrapes that both fighters sported. He was just finishing up when his beloved wife jumped into the clearing, slightly out of breath but still smiling. She walked over to her two supposed patients and immediately her medic-nin training took over as she assessed the pair. One was slightly snoring and sprawled out on the ground, the other was frozen into a half-crouched position. Seeing as the former was sleeping peaceably, the latter's condition seemed to hold more importance, but seeing as the latter was her indestructible, nastily sadistic mother-in-law...

Kaori turned to the sleeping genin. Inspecting the bandaged bruises, she scowled as she ran a diagnostic jutsu over those areas, and was immensely surprised when it revealed nothing but rapidly healing muscles.

Turning to her other patient, with a disapproving look on the face, Kaori ran a quick diagnostic jutsu over Tsubaki's body, and suddenly burst into bright, clear laughter. Looking up, she saw Tsubaki answering glare and Ling's questioning glance. Shaking her head, she double-checked the kunai blade Naruto still clutched in his hand and started laughing again. When Ling asked what was wrong, she answered, still chuckling, "The _snicker _substance that _chuckle _boy used was…" here she broke into a fit of giggles and had to take several deep breaths before she could recompose herself. When she did, she stated calmly, eyes mischievous, "The substance that is currently smeared on those kunai and coursing through your mother's bloodstream…" she turned to the old jounin with a grin on her face, "…was a paralysis salve developed by said mother."

Ling stared for a moment, just a moment, before breaking out into hearty laughter. Tsubaki however, even with her muscles frozen, still managed to flush a slightly red color. Seeing as Kaori wasn't going to be helping anytime soon, and now that she knew that the substance in her blood was one she knew, she concentrated, and started to relax as green healing chakra spread throughout her body, cleansing her blood. When she could move again, the first thing that she did was scowl, even if the effect was slightly ruined with a small uplifting of the corner of her mouth. At this, Ling and Kaori only laughed harder. And even as they moved home, carrying Naruto and following Tsubaki, both of them would still chuckle from time to time. Unknown to both, Tsubaki had a small half-grin on her face as well.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"…mmm…" As the sunlight struck Naruto's eyes, he rolled over on the bed, only to be met with another beam of light to the eyes. Trying to cover himself with the blanket didn't work as it suddenly, mysteriously vanished from his hands. Ditto with the pillow. Finally, when Naruto tried to bury his face into the mattress, Tsubaki twitched and kicked the mattress, as well as all items currently on it, into the air. Yelling, Naruto flailed through the air before sticking to the wall like a spider and cursing furiously at his attacker. He only noticed at mid-curse that the bedroom wasn't his, and he wasn't wearing Gopher-chan. Staring around, his eyes settled on Tsubaki, and he started yelling again. "You old hag! What the hell was that for? Feeble-minded, wrinkled old goat! I was having a nice dream with lots of ramen too! Thanks for nothing you shrunken…"

Tsubaki noticed, amused, that Naruto was delivering these paltry curses from a ninety degrees perspective on the wall, though her eye did twitch somewhat at 'fat sloth of a hag'. When he stopped to take a breath, she moved quickly, punching him in the gut and relieving him of what little breath he had left. With a large _THUMP_, he hit the ground, and stayed there, wheezing for breath as he choked out, "What the hell was that for!"

Leaning over his prone and windless body, she calmly stated, "It's time to train, so clean up and get your ass downstairs." She only got up to the word 'train' before Naruto's jutsu-orientated mind responded and went into overdrive. Tsubaki got to the bottom of the stairs, thought a while, then pulled a pile of clothes over to where she just stood. Ling walked in as she was doing so and asked, "Mother, what are you doing?"

Tsubaki's lips were moving silently as she looked up, and noted where Ling was standing and his proximity to the blast zone. She said, "Son, sometimes you have to listen to your mother…so be a dear and open that door for me will you?"

Puzzled, Ling did as he was bid to, and watched his mother start chanting a quiet countdown. _5…4…3…2…1…NOW! _An orange blur started running down the stairs, tripped, fell the rest of the way into a conveniently placed pile of cloth, and said random cloth/orange clothing/blond hair pileup skidded across the hall until it came to a stop in the middle of the street. For a moment everyone stared, then a hand popped out among the clothes and started waving. A muffled voice emerged, "Hey Ling-san! What's for breakfast?"

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

A very astonished married pair stood before the bottomless pit that was Naruto's stomach. Hiccupping slightly, he moved his latest empty bowl out of the way, and frowned slightly when he couldn't stack it on top of the other…oh, fourteen hefty servings of Icharaku ramen. Shrugging, he turned on his stool with a fox grin to Tsubaki, leaving Ling to look mournfully at the very tall stack of bowls before him.

Naruto didn't even have time to ask the question when he was yanked off of his stool by a somewhat irate and impatient elderly woman. Said elderly woman then proceeded to drag him across town to a secluded training area, all the while ignoring the blond's protests and yelps of pain. Kaori turned her head, looking at her mother-in-law's receding back and her husband's financial dilemma. Eventually, she shrugged, and headed after the two figures, deciding to make sure that the sadistically brutal old lady that was her husband's mother wouldn't kill her latest student before she had a chance to do so. As for Ling…he looked up to the sound-or rather lack thereof- of ramen cooking in the back, and instantly regretted it. Both of the father-daughter pair that ran the ramen house had identical looks on their faces, both of them spelled doom for the nonpayer. Ling walked out of the Icharaku ramen stand five minutes later, slumping, penniless, and asking himself, 'How many deities did I piss off to have deserved the vile punishment named Uzumaki Naruto?' In the back of his head, his subconscious voice helpfully supplied the answer, '_Somewhere along the range of "all of them" to "every last one of them".'_ Ling could practically _hear _the evil grin that his subconscious had plastered on his face; it was almost as evil as the ones plastered on the faces of the pair behind him as they counted their latest earnings.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Tsubaki smiled; it was a scary sight, it promised pain, lots and lots of pain. Naruto gulped. "Alright you little midget, during that entire fight, I noticed that your taijutsu was completely and utterly pathetic. Now, I absolutely refuse to teach my skills to such a weakling body as the example standing before me." Naruto's head hung.

Tsubaki continued, "As such…" Naruto's raised his head, and immediately regretted it; Tsubaki had a strange glint in her eyes, "…I have taken it upon myself to force that stringy cadaver of yours into shape, 'cause until it is, you my little friend, are a walking corpse. As a result, I have one day to cram about a week's worth of exercises into that stunted excuse you call a cranium, so let's get to it."

She immediately started taking him through a repertoire of torturous-no, _warm-up_, exercises designed to break-_stretch_ the body for later punishment. Naruto gritted his teeth as he switched between trying to force his body from one contorting position into another, and a more brutal, bastardized version of the standard Academy warm-up-ANBU Cadet Academy that is. It was especially irritating to do so when both his wizened mentor and Kaori did the same position perfectly-the latter whistling a cheerful tune while she did so, the former with a wicked grin on her face, and a wicked mind for insults.

"C'mon you dim-brained baka! It's not that hard! Look at me! I have at least four times the number of years under my belt than you and I'm still as flexible as the day I was born!"

"Put your back into it you damn lazy, undersized excuse for a shinobi! Is this the best you have! Huh! It is? You horrible, scrawny, brainless, baka!"

"What? Are you worried about getting your lily-white paws dirty? By all that's sacred and holy…if you don't move those arms, I'll move _you _to bitter tears!"

Finally, after having to hold for five minutes a particular position usually designed for contortionists, Naruto was allowed to flop on his face and take stock his injuries. The result he came to wasn't exactly encouraging, especially since he felt that he had pulled muscles he didn't even knew he had. Trying to shift over, he wrenched no less than six separate muscles and two or three joints. He ended up grinding his face even more into the dirt, where only the ground heard his groan.

Feeling somewhat sorry and in a kind mood, Tsubaki not-so-kindly kicked Naruto over so he could breathe. Of course, in doing so, she knocked the breath out of him again, and caused various spikes of pain as his body protested the sudden movement. Blissfully, he slipped into a light sleep as Kaori placed a calming palm charged with green chakra on him. Standing up, she faced her mentor and asked quietly, "Don't you think that was a little much? Even with my pregnancy, I had a little trouble keeping up with you."

Tsubaki raised a shriveled eyebrow. Truth be told, she was very impressed that he had even made it through the whole exercise, of course it was one of her medium-easier ones and he was slightly infamous for his absurdly large amount of stamina…even so, better nins than him had failed to get through. Tsubaki grinned sadistically, and this time it was Kaori whom lifted an eyebrow in silent question. "Think of it like this, if he can go this far now, imagine how far he'll go next week."

Kaori's eyebrow lifted somewhat higher, and Tsubaki knew she had her. _Hook…_

Kaori did state, somewhat regretfully, "Yeah…but you know his body won't be able to take that kind of punishment day after day… It's medically unsafe. I think the limit is about one every two or three days."

Scornfully, "Who said anything about doing an exercise every two or three days?" The eyebrow went higher. _…line…_

Tsubaki said nothing, did nothing, except point to Naruto's body. Kaori looked around; both her eyebrows lifted this time, as a slight film of red chakra covered the sleeping boy's body. She turned around, the question obvious on her face. Tsubaki stated, "The Kyubbi's chakra will heal the damage as soon as we deal it. What we have here, daughter-in-law, is a somewhat mentally deficient twelve-year old student whom has a _very_ good regenerative/healing ability, an incredibly large amount of stamina that will recharge mostly after a nap, and completely after a good night's sleep, and, in his quest to get stronger, will accept some of the more pitiful excuses that we offer to cover up for the more, shall we say, _painful_ workouts." A wicked grin blossomed on Tsubaki's face, "My dear, what we have here is the almost perfect dream student. And I don't plan to take it slow with an exercise every few days either, I'm going more along the lines of two to three _per _day. You in?" The matching grin on Kaori's face was all the answer she needed. _…and sinker…_

When Naruto woke up half an hour later, The first thought that flew through his mind was _mmm…the ground feels good, nice and firm and soft…_. Then he opened his eyes, and the first thing he saw was two matching sadistic grins. The second thing he thought went along the lines of, _Shit…should have stayed asleep…I'm gonna die!_

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

When a worried Ling went to search for the two elusive female members of his family, he kind of wished he never bothered when he did find them. Both of them were standing over a quivering mass of orange clothing and blond hair, getting it to bend _that _way, and do the work out like _this._ Ling sweatdropped as he saw-in his mind's eye- the bullwhips and various torture equipment that both of them were holding. He groaned as he leaned against the trunk of the tree he was in; when the females of his family got roused, they were about as sadistic as the entire torture division, minus Morino Ibiki of course, _no one_ was as sadistic as Morino Ibiki, though Kaori did come a close third, and Tsubaki an even closer second. Ignoring the moans of pain and the ANBU boot-camp orders emanating from the clearing, Ling placed his face in his hands as he mused over the viciousness of the females in his family. _Why was I attracted to such a vicious, bloodthirsty harpy? Why do I love my mother with her pain-fetish?_ The answer came, and he sighed, …_oh yeah, cause my mother's family, and Kaori…_A lecherous grin spread across his face as he recalled their nightly 'playtime', Kaori looked _so_ innocently beautiful in her daily kimono, and _so _sinfully delicious in all that gorgeous black-or lack thereof-underneath… Sometimes it paid to know how to tailor all _sorts_ of materials into all _sorts _of clothing, including using some of the more…_uncommon…_mediums to make some more…_material-economical_…attires.

Ling grinned, then he choked as he remembered the results of said 'playtime', and devoutly hoped and wished and prayed against all odds to the Power(s) That Be that he wouldn't have a girl. Knowing his current relationship with the deities upstairs, though, he would have female twins, they'd both take after his beautiful, sadistic wife in _every_ way, and when they were of age…he would go crazy between his aggressive paternal instincts towards boyfriends, and his masculine feelings of pity and sympathy towards said boyfriends. His moans of anguish towards the _very_ possible future mingled with a particular blond's moan of pain towards the _very_ concrete now.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto groaned and moaned as he dragged his body upstairs to his apartment. With every step, he cursed the fox's training seal, with every other step, he cursed his two new 'trainers' even more. When he finally managed to drag his beaten excuse for a corpse across the threshold, he fell flat on his face. Familiar mocking laughter echoed through the mindscape of his head and he gritted his teeth. A fierce desire to get well enough to shove it into both of his 'senseis' face tomorrow made him struggle to his feet. Pride got him across the room fairly steadily. Stubbornness got him to eat his daily dinner of ramen. Then, having exhausted the more useful emotions, his mind shutdown and he fell asleep, there on the counter, half a strand of a noodle still sticking to the side of his face. A pair of masculine hands wiped his face off, changed him, and stuck him in his bed. After tucking him in, a pair of eyes looked around and saw that everything was right in the world, before he closed the door, Ling murmured, "You better thank me for this Naruto-san." With a final _click_, the door closed, and Ling leapt away, towards his house and his wife's more-than-loving embrace.

Unnoticed by him, Naruto had a smile on his face as he whispered, "Thanks Ling-san." Giggling a bit, he snuggled into his bed to be more comfortable, and let sweet darkness embrace him.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

**Hey kit.**

Naruto looked around him. By now, the night visits to the fox's cell registered nothing more than mild surprise. _Hey furball!_

**Don't call me furball baka!**

Pleasantry rituals finished, Naruto settled down, calling in a sofa to lean back on, hey, it was his mind, his words, and his word was law there. _So…_

**So?**

_So why did you call me here? You usually don't do so to say hi or anything._

**Well…Sorry to burst you bubble kit,** not sounding the least bit sorry at all, **this is gonna be one of those times when I'm just bored so I toy around with your mind a bit.**

_…damn furball…_

**Yeaaaah… Let's begin shall we? If there were twenty nins surrounding you and three others, how many would you be able to kill if the conditions were unknown, the weather was unpredictable, and you, your teammates of three nins, and the twenty enemy nin were chakraless and weaponless? **

_Stupid furball…what the hell does that have to do with anything!_

**It's just me playing head games with you kitling. **The Kyubbi's voice sounded _way_ too cheerful for Naruto's liking.

_…stupid furball…_

**Now, on to business. **The once cheerful voice was now laced with sobriety and seriousness.

Taken somewhat aback, Naruto replied, cautiously, _Alright…so, what is it?_ Then, attempting a joke, _Who do you want me to kill and sacrifice on your altar?_

The demon fox's eyes and face didn't even register the bit of black humor. **Kit. Listen, and listen well. Everything that Tsubaki is teaching you…remember it. Not that much of a problem since you have a photographic memory.**

Naruto snarled at the reminder of one of the greatest banes of his life. Even shinobi generally envied other nins with a photographic memory. Sure he had the ability to remember everything and anything that he saw. Sure he could go over past battles like he was watching a movie, could even use it like a pseudo-Sharingan, to memorize the seals that an enemy used for his jutsu, to memorize the taijutsu moves they used, so he could possibly learn them for himself. Others envied and feared that ability, just like they had envied and feared the Uchiha clan for their doujutsu.

Theydidn't _understand_, couldn't _understand, _the curse that came with such a 'gift'. That those with the 'Sharingan memory' memorized _everything_, from the smallest detail, such as how many keys did so and so have, to the most gruesome of scenes. What they saw, they _remembered, _what they heard, they _remembered, _they remembered everything, and they stayed there; at the surface of the mind, so any subconscious trigger would force them to remember it again. There was a reason why most of the registered nins with photographic memories had gone insane, or went to an early grave. They couldn't handle the memories; a shinobi's lifestyle was never bloodless, eventually, somewhere along the way, he or she would have to kill, and kill, and kill, and they would never forget the look on their targets' faces, never forget the number of people they had to kill. In the end, it was always the same, a choice, a proverbial junction in the mind, to live on, remembering everything, every last _damn_ thing that you had ever done, or to try to forget them, to erase the memories as if they had never existed. In the end…Konoha's history spoke for itself. In the entirety of Konoha's history, there had existed only a dozen and a half nins, including him, with the photographic memory. When the average number of nins a generation came to be somewhere in the range of two hundred shinobi and kunoichi and there had been about five generations worth of shinobi since the first year of the rule of the Shodaime, well…not a very common curse, so not much was known about the mentality of the people whom possessed it. There was, however, in all the research books and ancient dossiers of Konoha nins that the Kyubbi forced him to read, a recurring factor that even he picked up.

Most of them went insane by the time they were twenty-five years of age, and all of them had died by age thirty-five. Usually suicide, mostly by just standing there as an enemy nin jutsu-ed them or barraged them with flying metal. Only three had ever kept their sanity or lived long enough to bear children, two of the three never showed traces of the curse, the third died too early to know whether she bore it or not.

In a twisted way, Naruto was lucky when he was born on the day of the Kyubbi attack. He received so much more ridicule to be sure, but since the majority of his life's memories were so bad, in the end, it was either his psyche or his sanity, and, with some subtle unconscious self-preservation instinct from the Kyubbi-or rather, the Kyubbi's chakra-his psyche bent first, and the result was a somewhat modified photographic memory. He still couldn't forget anything, only lock it away somewhere in his mind, he still knew about them, could bring them to the surface with a moment's notice, he just kept them at bay with willpower alone, so that seeing a familiar object wouldn't trigger them as they used to.

_Flashback…_

**Kit, I have some good news and… **He was interrupted before he even finished the sentence.

_Bad news first._

The Kyubbi looked on with gloomy humor. **How do you know that I don't have any bad news?**

_I don't, but when you start, 'I have some good news…', it usually means that there's something bad coming up. If you just have good news, you usually just act mysteriously stubborn and I usually have to promise you all sorts of things before I get to hear it._ Fox grin.

The Kyubbi snarled half-heartedly at the cheek, he even sounded somewhat melancholy, **Insolent kit. Don't mock the great Kyubbi…** He trailed off into a whisper and stared somewhere long enough for Naruto to feel nervous.

_Er…_

**Oh, oh yeah. **The Kyubbi put on a forced happy expression, and affected a cheery voice, **You know all those nins I've had you read about?**

_What? You mean the ones with the freakishly good brains? Yeah! It's kind of weird that they all died early and went insane and…_

The Kyubbi's voice lanced through his words, **You have one of them.**

Naruto froze in mid rant. He asked cautiously, _I have one of what?_

In the voice of one knowing that what's going to come out of his mouth next would probably damn him forever in the eyes of the person he's saying it too, the Kyubbi said, **A 'freakishly good brain', as you put it. You have one. You have a photographic memory.**

That scared him, scared him good, so he reacted to it like he reacted to everything bad; with his mask on and that small mischievous spark in his eyes, said spark looked somewhat subdued and dead though, _So…you're saying that I can remember all the times that you farted in mid-sentence and all the embarrassing slips that you've made and blackmail you with them?_

The Kyubbi, the almighty nine-tailed demon fox, Lord of the Foxes, and pinnacle of the Fox summons, made a noise somewhere between a squawk and a growl. **You do so kit, and we're gonna find out if these bars really are unbreakable. **Both of them had a good laugh over that, and both of them knew it was black humor; gallows humor, the laughter of the living dead.

Eventually Naruto sobered up enough to ask, _So I'll remember everything that has ever happened to me, and eventually I'm gonna go insane and try to kill my self in…about twenty-three years?_

For the first time in this conversation, the Kyubbi relaxed somewhat, **Well…yes and no. Yes you will remember everything that has ever happened to you, and everything that will happen, but you might not go insane and decide to kill your self.**

_…I don't really like the sound of 'might'._

**Better than the one hundred percent absoluteness that precedent holders have.**

The Kyubbi and Naruto continued chatting for a while, then the fox let Naruto go just as class was ending. The rest of the day was spent in silence, as he tried to contemplate what a lifespan of another twenty-five years was going to do for him. For one thing, he would have to get a great deal stronger, a great deal faster, if he wanted to become acknowledged as the Hokage. For another, he better not have any kids, even if history said that the trait didn't pass on, it was best to be sure. You never know when genetics would throw a wrench into someone's life, he was a walking reminder of that, son of the Yondaime, the greatest Hokage ever, and forced to keep it a secret because he was born at the right place at the wrong time, forced to keep it under wraps because of a damn nine tailed demon fox in his belly. It was the one time that he actually _despised_ the fox; it lasted all of a split second, but still long enough for Naruto to regret it. He was having a _really_ bad day.

Ironically, it was also the only sunny day for weeks after.

…_End Flashback_

**…kit. Oy, kit. LISTEN UP! **The Kyubbi's roar effectively shook him out of his daze. **You know that twenty nin question? At the end of all that lovely sadistic training, I expect you to be able to answer 'all twenty' and actually be able to do it. I can help you with your ninjutsu by just telling you the hand seals, and helping you with what's wrong with your chakra. Genjutsu…well, you're helpless…that's the best you're ever going to get. You just don't have-and probably never will have-the intricate control needed for it, so just remind me to teach you the dispel techniques for it when you ever have the control for even **_**that.**_Naruto winced at the brutal truth, but accepted it without comment.

The Kyubbi continued, **Finally, taijutsu, a skill every nin should be at least adept at. Even summons have to be trained in it, since it's usually what they use to fight with, aside from their bulk and size. Human taijutsu, however, is something I don't know much about. **Naruto replied with an expression that said, 'Huh?'

The Kyubbi sighed, **Put it like this, in a battle, if worse comes to worse, I can simulate the effects of handseals with my chakra, to do certain jutsus. But nothing will help me in learning a skill that's not designed for my body shape. I can describe the moves, and tell you the basic principal and effects behind them, but taijutsu is best learned with someone helping you, correcting your stances, which means a **_**physical **_**partner. As such, taijutsu is something you're better off learning from another human.**

_Than why shouldn't I ask Kakashi-sensei or Iruka-sensei for help?_

**Never gonna help, already did help, in that order.**

_Huh?_

**Like I said, the silver-haired masked bastard isn't going to help, and the scar-faced one has already built you up to where you are today. You won't advance much farther with either of them as your teachers. Besides…**The Kyubbi gave its own version of a fox grin: curled lips, fangs, flared whiskers, incisors, demonic intent, teeth, more teeth, even more teeth… **I need to take notes on the lovely torture work-outs Tsubaki gives you. The pathetic little whimpering noises you make while doing so just adds seasoning.**

_BASTARD FURBALL!_ Naruto made two very succinct gestures with his hands before stomping away. The fox's raucous laughter followed him all way into the real world. As he kicked the covers off, Naruto gave a muttered, "…stupid furball…" before starting on some of the morning workouts Tsubaki showed him.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"NO, NO, AND HELL NO!"

Kakashi sighed before hiding his face behind his Icha Icha Paradise. Naruto could be really annoying at times.

"Naruto!" Iruka sighed as he closed his eyes and prepared to go into 'sensei-mode', "Newly formed genin teams can only take on low-level D-class missions. C-class and higher missions are given out to the more advanced teams and chuunins. Chuunins also take on the lower B-class missions, the higher B-class missions are usually taken on by jounins whom also take on the A-class missions. Get it Naruto? Naruto?"

Iruka's eyebrow twitched as he saw his speech had fallen on deaf ears, "…I had miso ramen yesterday, and beef ramen for breakfast, so...that means shrimp and chicken ramen for lunch. Now for dinner…OW!" Naruto rubbed the spot on his head where the scroll had hit, and reached over to pick up the offending object. Iruka sat down, a whole lot calmer now that he had vented his emotions. "Now, I'm afraid that you're stuck with D-class missions for now Naruto."

"Oh really…" Everybody within earshot shivered at the malevolently cheerful voice. Those whom had the misfortune to hear that particular tune _personally_ dived for cover. The only ones not affected; the Hokage, Iruka, and Team 7, peered around the empty room. Sakura's jaw dropped at the result, Kakashi's single visible eyebrow was raised. Even Sasuke had trouble showing an impassive face. Within record time, the majority of the once semi-full room had departed, or only seemed to have. Multiple quivering knees exposed those trying to hide behind the plants, and toes could be seen protruding from the curtains. A few brave souls peeked from behind the door. Since both the Hokage and Iruka had been on the receiving end of that voice-and the multitude of vengeful pranks that came with it-for quite a number of times, they had developed quite the immunity to it. Even so, the Hokage was impressed against his will at the effect, a low whistle reverberated throughout the room. _Note to self Sarutobi: Get Naruto to produce a recording of that voice, play to Morino Ibiki, document results. _

Another low whistle brought all their attentions back to Naruto. He had opened the scroll, and was now eagerly pouring through the contents and muttering to himself occassionally, "Lemme see…elimination of a group rogue ninjas…capture the bandit king, elimination of bandit gangs _optional, _heheh…save the princess, escort across unknown territory, enemy status unknown…possibility of death: very high, payment…woah!" Naruto's voice had grown in excitement as he went on, Sasuke had wandered over in curiosity"…Rank: A-class! Yeah! I think we'll take this one Iruka-sensei!"

"Wha?" Iruka looked down, sure enough; he was missing an A-class mission scroll, "Baka Naruto! Give me back that mission scroll!"

"Nyah nyah! Catch me if you can Iruka-sensei!" Naruto rolled up the scroll with an expert flip of his wrist and was about to take off with it when he felt something grab his leg. "Huh?" Looking down, he saw that there was a thin wire wrapped around his ankle, the other end led to one Umino Iruka, he had a foot braced on the desk, and a strange look in his eyes.

Reaching out with one hand, he gave a sharp pull, and Naruto went down hard. Everybody winced at the sound. Conversationally, as he was reeling Naruto in, Iruka said, "Now now, it seems that I've caught something. Wonder what fish it's going to be…Hokage-sama, care to guess?" Iruka turned to the Hokage.

Caught somewhere between extreme amusement and extreme disapproval, his mind had a quick tussle, before a sense of revengeful satisfaction swamped both sides, "I don't know Iruka, why don't you reel it in?"

"Gladly." There was a slightly feral smile on his face as he pulled in a struggling, thrashing Naruto. Wrapping the wire around his wrist for a moment, he strung it through two kunai before throwing them in different directions; one straight up, one slightly back and down, then reeled in a good deal more of the wire. In the end, he was holding a coil of wire that ran from his hand, through a kunai imbedded in the floor behind the desk, up, through the kunai in the ceiling, and down to a now sullen, hanging, Naruto's foot. Most of the shinobi in the room had to stifle their laughter at the scene; it looked like Naruto was the 'catch of the day', Sasuke was currently rubbing the back of his hand against his mouth, it didn't quite remove his smile.

Iruka had a quiet smile on his face, "'Catch me if you can', huh? Well, you're caught Naruto, please give me back the scroll." He held out his hand.

"No." With that huff, he-somehow managing this without contact to _anything_-turned his back to Iruka, and tightened his grasp on the scroll and closed his eyes.

Iruka's voice became coaxing, "Naruto…ramen!" Naruto's eyes snapped wide open, Iruka continued, his voice getting deeper, somehow richer, "Icharaku ramen, Naruto…hot…steamy…long…" Within earshot, most of the grown kunoichis and quite a few of the men suddenly started to shift positions uneasily, Iruka's voice grew softer, "…imagine the taste…of the meat, imagine biting down into the flesh…" More shifting, a growing tension about hip-height, a few low moans. "…imagine drinking, from the bowl of desire…the nectar of the gods…the sweetness, the salt, the thick, liquid _heat_ sliding down, down your throat…" Pressure was building up, more than a few red faces, Iruka continued, his voice husky now, "…remember the noodles Naruto…their length…how long they were…as your lips met their body, and let them pass into your mouth…the warmth pooling in your cheeks…" Under the desk, staring upwards at Iruka's legs and torso and everything in between, the poor kunoichi currently hiding there finally couldn't take it anymore, couldn't ignore the growing pressure in her lower belly, and finally broke down. With shaking hands, she completed the seals for the teleportation jutsu, and disappeared with a large poof of smoke, interrupting Iruka in mid-whisper. As if that was a signal, almost everybody else started leaving anyway they could, from teleportation jutsus to good old-fashioned running. Most of them had hands clutched to their groin; more than a few of them had dark spots spreading from where their hands were.

Iruka started as the sudden stampede emptied the room. Shrugging, he turned back to the remaining Team 7, and sweatdropped when he realized he was standing in a puddle of drool. Spinning Naruto around, he stared at the blissful face, the vice-grip on the mission scroll, and the drool running down-well, up from Naruto's point of view-Naruto's face, and dripping from his spiky blond hair. Tentatively, Iruka reached out to grab the scroll that had caused all this, only to find that, somehow, Naruto's fingers tightened even more at the first tug, and his eyes snapped open. "Icharaku's ramen was a cheap and underhanded thing to do Iruka-sensei…I might have actually accepted if you had kept going."

Iruka shrugged, only mildly dejected that it didn't work, "Fine, please, Naruto? I'll treat you after if you give me the scroll."

Naruto's face tightened, "I said no, and I mean no, Iruka-sensei."

Thinking wildly, Iruka blurted out the first thing that came to mind, "The first rule of the Shinobi Code deals with obedience to your superiors."

Naruto frowned slightly, then he dug into his supply pouch. What he pulled out surprised everyone; the latest copy of Konoha's Shinobi rules and guidelines. Still clutching the damn scroll, he licked his finger, and delicately turned page after page, scanning them rather quickly, after which, he chucked said delicate book over his shoulder, coincidently hitting Kakashi in the head with it. Naruto stared-upside down-Iruka in the eyes and stated, quite calmly, "Rule number one in the Shinobi Code is actually to honor Konoha's laws at all times. Rule number two is to protect and serve the inhabitants of Konoha. Rule number _three_ is to obey your superiors."

Iruka blinked, and blinked, and blinked again. "Really?"

"Um…" this time Sakura spoke up, from the rulebook she had buried herself into after it bounced off Kakashi's springy hair, "Actually, Naruto's right, rule three _is_ to obey your superiors."

"Also…" Iruka turned back to Naruto's trademark fox grin, "Rule number 87 states that once a mission has been given, no one but the Hokage or his proxy may give the retraction order necessary to scrap it."

"I didn't give you the mission!"

"Yeah you did Iruka-sensei!" Naruto chirped, "You gave it to me the moment the scroll left your hands and came into mine! So technically…" Naruto grinned, "This is Team 7's next mission, and we're obligated by Konoha law to complete it." That simple statement caused a few violent reactions; the Hokage choking on his pipe, Sakura dropping her precious book in shock, Sasuke's immediate spike of interest, Kakashi looking up from his book, and finally, last but not least, Iruka's face turning blue, whether it was rage or lack of breath, no one knew. Naruto just kept grinning as everyone stared at him in shock.

Sakura was the first one to break the silence, "Naruto no baka! We aren't ready for an A-rank mission yet!"

Naruto just kept grinning as he stared at Iruka's reaction, he didn't do anything that would have said that he acknowledged Sakura's comment, but he said, "We're obligated by Konoha law Sakura-chan. If we break the law, we're resigned to either jail or execution."

"Yes, but…" Sakura cast her eyes around for something to aid her argument, her eyes slid on to the Sandaime, "Hokage-sama, please give the retraction order!"

The Sandaime was about to say that he was just about to do that when Naruto treated him to a death glare and stated, "Old man, if you say _anything_ before this is over…well, you know how I hate perverts?" Sarutobi nodded, and then choked as Naruto dropped the bombshell, "_I know where your stash is!_" Knowing Naruto, he had probably known where it was for a long time, having him telling you so with that malevolent, demonic voice implied a lot of things, very few of them left his precious, precious books untouched.

"But…" Sakura trailed off as she realized that Sasuke was staring at her.

"Sakura-chan, drop it." It was a simple statement, complete with complementary glare and high-level coolness factor, and if not for Sakura's undying love for the raven-haired heartthrob, completely and utterly useless. Sakura fell silent.

Naruto grinned, "Now that we all know where we stand…" Naruto relaxed his grip on the scroll and offered it to Iruka with one hand.

Iruka stared at the proffered scroll like it had just grown fangs, then stared down at Naruto. "What's the catch?"

Naruto grinned slightly wider, "The Code states that shinobi are not allowed to refuse missions, but we _can_ put in for a transfer request.

"You had this planned the whole time," it wasn't a question.

"Yep! So?" Iruka silently took the scroll from Naruto's hands, and replaced it with another. Naruto just clasped his hand around the scroll before tossing it, "Hey Sasuke-teme, hold this for me will you?"

Sasuke scowled as he caught the scroll. _How…he just outwitted both a chuunin and the Hokage! Worse, I'm actually glad for it, since now I can test my skills._ Then his eyes shifted between the stoic Hokage, a chastising Iruka, and the struggling Naruto. He managed to look in Naruto's direction in time to see him pull the kunai out of the ceiling with his movements. "…dobe…" _ I can't believe he stopped! He had the advantage there and he just gave it away! Idiot…gave up the A-rank scroll for a C-rank one…_

Naruto groaned as he propped himself up. Iruka sighed and shook his head before he bent down, unwound the wire around Naruto's leg and started winding it up. "I told you not to do that. You'll have to watch that blonde head of yours for tomorrow's mission."

At these words, Naruto immediately perked up. "Oh yeah…hey Sasuke…HEY WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING SASUKE! THAT'S MY MISSION SCROLL YOU"RE READING THERE!"

Sasuke just looked up from his reading with his trademark scowl. A scowl that quickly changed into a slight smirk when he saw Iruka-already haven forgotten Naruto's head injury, bop him one over the head. "BAKA! THAT'S A TEAM MISSION! SASUKE WOULD HAVE HAD TO READ IT EVENTUALLY!"

"Eh! I thought you only offered _me_ that mission scroll!"

"WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THAT!"

"Well you threw the damn thing at me didn't you?"

"BAKA! EVEN A C-RANK MISSION IS TOO MUCH FOR YOU TO TAKE ON ALONE, LET ALONE AN A-RANK MISSION!"

"Aa…" Kakashi's interruption had both contestants staring at him he sweatdropped as he received a double dose of killing glares. "You might want to know the specifics of your next mission Naruto."

Those words were enough to stop the blonde in mid-retort. He closed his mouth and started looking surly and ready to start a fight. Iruka, with instincts borne from years in the classroom, treated Naruto's hair to a glance of his death-glare. Naruto shivered a bit but still sulked. Iruka stared directly at the back of Naruto's had and turned up the ferocity of the glare, giving Kakashi a hit of it as well. The experienced jounin, with years of war, violence, and bloodshed-laden killing intents, started shivering with no end in sight. Later on, witnesses would swear that there were wisps of smoke coming from Naruto's head, and that Kakashi had bundled himself up with blankets and a stack of his ever-growing Icha Icha Paradise collection. Even without looking at him, Naruto could _feel_ the weight of Iruka-sensei's death-glare; he knew better to argue when Iruka-sensei was like this, so he just gave one final shiver and sulked over to where Sasuke and Sakura were reading the sparse contents of the scroll.

Both of them relinquished the scroll to him without comment, having already finished it while the festivities were going on. He read the mission contents first, it was fairly straightforward; protect client against bandits, thieves and the like until client finished his businesses. Mission time could last anywhere from a week to two months, with overtime pay if it took longer than that, of course. However…Naruto made a face at the payment plan, about five hundred ryo per week. Konoha automatically took off twenty percent for mission expenses, which left four hundred ryo for payment. Split evenly, it meant about a hundred ryo each, weekly, _not _counting expenses and the like. So basically, it meant that they made a little over fifteen ryo a day. A lot of D-rank missions paid better than that! Looking up, he noticed Sasuke and Sakura making faces of their own. He turned over to Kakashi, he shrugged lightly and said, "That's how the shinobi world works Naruto; it's still our mission, and we're obligated by Konoha law to take it…like you so kindly reminded us a few minutes ago." Naruto made another face at the reminder. Looking back down, he finished studying the scroll. It was only after he rolled it up that he realized something was missing. He quickly flipped the scroll open again and scanned the contents before looking up at Kakashi, face accusing, "Oy! Where's the description of the guy we're protecting?"

Kakashi's one visible eye blinked; evidently he had missed that also. He cursed himself for letting such an important thing slip his mind. Luckily for him, the Sandaime came to the rescue, "Oh don't worry Naruto. Come in please!" The last sentence was addressed to someone standing outside the large double doors, said doors opened. "Naruto, let me introduce you to Tazuna-san, a bridge-builder from Wave country. Tazuna-san, let me introduce you to Team Seven, the ninjas whom will be protecting you for the next two months."

Tazuna was about as average as the normal civilians, if Naruto had anything to say about it, though he did seem stronger than your regular off-the-street man. He had a slight ragged straw hat on, and well-made but well-worn clothing, as well as a sturdy backpack that looked like it had seen better days. A traveler's outfit, not flashy or brand new, but rather battered, used well and still usable. The bottle of sake in his hand however, said to Naruto, 'drunk'. The fact that this Tazuna had a flushed face and reeked of sake even from across the room only completed the picture.

Tazuna cast a slightly drunken eye across the room's inhabitants, and immediately focused on the four closest to him. _An open pervert, a brooder, a fangirl, and…what is he wearing? Are shinobis even allowed to be wearing something that bright?_ "They look too much like small-fry for my liking Hokage-sama. Are you sure they can handle the job of protecting me?"

All three 'small-fry' twitched simultaneously, Tazuna continued as he had never saw the three glares aimed at him, "The smallest one looks especially weak."

"Haha! You're right! So who's the smallest one…" Sasuke and Sakura stood closer to Naruto as he finished. The revelation the he was looking _up_ to both of them hit him like a ton of proverbial bricks. His revelation glare at nobody in general and life in particular scared the proverbial crap out of the person he just happened to be looking at, namely Tazuna.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Tazuna shivered at the sudden relapse, when the short blonde had just glared at him, he would have…well, he would have done something his mother had trained him out of doing a long time ago. He shivered again before taking a swig from his sake, and instantly felt _much _better. He let out a noise of approval as he stared at the Konoha-brewed sake with more respect. Guess ninja villages had their uses besides just shinobi after all, maybe he should stock up for the long journey ahead… Tazuna hurried off to the nearest bar to get pleasantly drunk.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"Arrgh! Old bastard! I'll show him! Oh, Itaidaskumo!" Iruka looked on fondly as Naruto proceeded-once again-to clean out his wallet.

Taking a bite of his own ramen, Iruka admonished, "Now now Naruto, it's not nice to say such things about a guy you just met."

"Yeah, whatever…" Naruto proceeded to finish his bowl, "Seconds please. Hey Iruka-sensei?"

"Hm?"

"Where did you learn that wire trick?"

"Oh, _chomp_ that?" Iruka swallowed, "Well…after you graduated I cleaned out my desk and coincidentally found a drawer full of prank items," he wagged his eyebrows conspiratorially at Naruto, whom just grinned, "and I had to do _something_ with them. Wish I learned that earlier though, would have saved me a lot of grief every time you tried to run away from me."

"Ah well. Hey, Iruka-sensei?"

"Hm?"

"Could I get sevenths?" Iruka choked and swallowed as he stared at Naruto holding his empty ramen bowl out, five others stacked beside him, and his fearsome, infamous, Puppy Eyes no Jutsu. _No…must resist…cuteness!_

Iruka held out for a full three seconds before relenting. A deep sigh full of remorse accompanied Naruto's happy cheers. It was going to be a long-not to mention expensive-night for Iruka.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Omake

In one bedroom, "…mmm…yes…yes…"

In another, "…right there…yeah…"

And another, lots of heavy panting and several grunts permeated the air.

Needless to say, there were multiple cries of ecstasy that rang throughout the village that night.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

The next morning, a confused Iruka was enthusiastically thanked by no less than five weary but incredibly happy shinobis enroute to work. During work, he excused himself for sickness after the seventh shinobi thanked him in less than half an hour. He decided to go for a walk instead. However, throughout the entire day, random male shinobis found him, popped up, thanked him whole-heartedly or said that they owed him favors, and leaving with that dammed teleportation jutsu before Iruka could ask what for. Of course the sudden rush of tired/happy shinobis completely blinded him from the hungry eyes of the majority of the kunoichi population.

If one decided to dig through the social layers of Konoha now, one would find that Iruka was, with a complete lack of knowledge from him, unofficially dubbed as having one of Konoha's sexiest voices. If one digs a bit deeper in the kunoichi gossip section, one would find that Iruka was also now one of Konoha's hottest bachelors, ranking up there with Genma, always chewing that senbon that first started attracting the ladies, and Kakashi, though no one had ever bragged to seeing his face, damn that mask! Iruka was a recent addition, previously unnoticed to many a kunoichi's chagrin, they decided to try and make up for lost time.

For the rest of the week, Iruka felt like he was being stalked. Iruka started taking the-shall we say-route less traveled between home and work. He didn't leave his house for more than essentials for the next week after, and even then he was jumpy, do you have any idea how embarrassing it is to flinch randomly in the middle of a sentence while talking to that beautiful college of yours? For months afterwards, Iruka was targeted by a few persistent kunoichis, though he was oblivious to the string of somewhat-obvious hints they gave him. Needless to say, he kept his virginity.

For the rest of the week, the majority of Konoha's kunoichi population stalked Iruka trying to get him into bed with them. Those that were at the 'Incident' apparently told others, and the word was out among kunoichis that Iruka would be _the_ catch of the year, and seduction tactics came into play. They failed miserably, especially when Iruka began to hole himself up in his house, though a few felt they managed to make progress on the cute pony-tailed shinobi. They continued, though they never managed to get to even kissing, which was when they gave up…for now.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

A/N: Ah! 11,000 words! Not quite epic length, but getting there!

Sorry for the long hiatus, schoolwork sucks, and the dry period felt like a cold shower on my idea. Translation: short, sudden visits of inspiration and motivation with LONG bouts of writer's block in between. This is probably going to be my last update for a while, so don't expect anything until summer vacation. Sorry, being sixteen sucks academically. One thing though…I AM NOT ABANDONING THIS FIC, SHORT OF DYING, I WILL FINISH THIS, PROMISE. Though if I do die than I expect my soul to be reincarnated in another body and finish this fic then. Of course, the fact that this just a long proto-prologue to another fic is good motivation…oops, did I just type that? (laughs)

Alright, for those of you that don't know, I believe a generation is essentially the amount of time between the average child getting born, and that child growing up to have children of his own. I think its somewhere between twenty-two and thirty years.

Oh, and tell me how my omake was, it's my first, is it any good?


End file.
